Yes, you already know that machines hate me, for I have bitched and complained endlessly about it here. But their campaign is relentless, and their attempts to screw up my life are neverending.
It wasn't enough that my car left me stranded in the center of three lanes at a major intersection earlier this week, or that my computer occasionally simply decides to do something wacky that will eliminate hours of work (regardless of how often I've saved or backed up).
This morning, my alarm didn't go off.
Actually, it did go off, but I didn't hear it because the problem is not with the alarm per se, but with the volume control on the clock radio. The volume is controlled by a slider, which has two settings - off and way-too-loud - separated by the tiniest and most fragile of margins. If the control is set to way-too-loud (as it must be) and, for instance, Amanda slams a door in Palembang, the control slips to off.
Amanda slammed the door this morning.
Agnes shook me awake at 4:30 (my usual alarm time is 4:10), sweetly and urgently asking me if I knew what time it was. Now, since I am a creature of habit who depends upon my morning rituals to ease into the working day, my whole morning schedule is fried and the rest of the day is in question. AARRGGHH!!
Today is payday. Tomorrow, I'm buying a new clock radio. And I'm going to make sure the new clock radio doesn't have a chance to meet the old one before I install it.
But it won't matter, because they're all linked on some unknown level of mechanical consciousness.
And they're all out to get me.
Watch out for your own machines...when they get tired of screwing around with me, they may turn on you.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.