Tuesday, August 31, 2021

Guest Post


Hello, there! We haven't met yet, but let me introduce myself - I'm Falcon, Bilbo and Agnes's grandhorse. Nice to meet you.


I realize that, with all the bad stuff going on in the world, you probably don't think much about horses*, but you ought to remember that we are important to you for a lot of reasons. One of these is that we still exemplify that quality you call horse sense ... a quality seen less and less nowadays with the vast growth in the number of people you call horse's asses, who tend to be full of horse ... uh ... caca. 

You humans are just beyond understanding. I don't especially care if you deliberately endanger each other for stupid reasons, like refusing to get vaccinated for deadly diseases, but now a lot of you are stupid enough to endanger me and my animal friends because you ignore your doctors and insist on taking Ivermectin, the medicine vets prescribe for controlling worms and parasites in horses, sheep, and pigs. You seem to be unaware that Ivermectin has not been proven to provide any protection against Covid-19 ... unlike the various vaccines developed and approved for that specific purpose. You are clearly lacking in horse sense. Or any other kind of sense.

The expression horse sense implies that those who possess it are practical, discreet, and down-to-earth ... like us horses. It's our superpower ... our horsepower, as it were. We can't all be like the famous equine hero El Kabong, but we know how to protect each other.



So, saddle up, humans. Get some horse sense. Do the right thing for each other. Stop buying into the herd mentality** of those who wear silly red hats, or who wear huge cowboy hats without ever having dealt with a cow that wasn't portioned and shrink-wrapped. If you're going to pay attention to horse's asses, pay attention to real ones ...


Bilbo will be back with his own thoughts later. Until then, just say neigh to Ivermectin.

Falcon

* Unless you bet on the races, of course.

** Bilbo calls it "ass-clownery," but I think that's an insult to asses, who work a lot harder than most of you do, anyhow.

Sunday, August 29, 2021

Musical Sunday


This has been a bad month for my favorite singers. Two weeks ago on Musical Sunday we celebrated the wonderful Nanci Griffith, who passed away on Friday the 13th (bad luck for lovers of her musical style), and this past week we mourned the loss of the great Tom T. Hall, whose long history of number one hits cemented his reputation as a wonderful storyteller in song. My favorite Tom T. Hall songs are "Old Dogs, Children, and Watermelon Wine" and "Homecoming," but for sheer fun, I'll go with this week's musical offering, in which he tells the story of the week he spent in a county jail ...


When it's my time to go, I hope I'll get to see Tom T. Hall and Nanci Griffith perform again.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, August 28, 2021

Cartoon Saturday


Sigh ...

The evacuation of Americans, allied personnel, and Afghans continued from Afghanistan with more than 109,000 people flown out in a huge airlift, even as an ISIS-affiliated group conducted a suicide bombing at the Kabul airport that murdered 13 American service members and 170 other people; the first nest of giant "murder hornets" found so far this year has been destroyed in Washington state; tropical storm Ida may strike Louisiana this weekend as a category 3 hurricane; the Supreme Court ruled 6-3 along ideological lines to end a Covid-related moratorium on evictions; and in Virginia, Republicans decided to challenge the results of an election that hasn't even happened yet, filing a suit to remove Democratic candidate for governor Terry McAuliffe from the November election ballot because he forgot to sign a form declaring his candidacy.

This week, in honor of the many Americans too ignorant, stupid, or hell-bent on rights over responsibilities to get vaccinated, I thought a collection of cartoons about cavemen* would be appropriate.

I'll bet they were ...  


Oh, I don't know ... I'm sure there are a lot of conspiracy theorists who would ...


No good deed goes unpunished ...


As the new school year begins, so too do the rituals ...


The tradition goes back a long way ...


Artistic license, yes ...


It's scream o'clock ...


The dawn of parking restrictions ...


Now, there's a cave I could get used to living in ...


I'm not sure it really has evolved ...


And so it goes for this week's Cartoon Saturday ... I hope you enjoyed it. Have a good day and a great weekend. Be safe, and come back tomorrow for a Musical Sunday visit with one of the great storytellers, Tom T. Hall. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* Okay, cavepersons. Don't get your kickers in a twist.

Friday, August 27, 2021

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2021


Much of the time it's difficult to select the appropriate recipient of my Ass Clown awards, but every once in a while it's as easy as pie. Without the least doubt or hesitation, I present a group award for

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2021


to

The Anti-Vaxxers


Covid-19 in all its variants is a deadly disease that has killed more than 630,000 Americans and nearly 4,500,000 persons worldwide. In a towering feat of medical science and modern manufacturing and logistics, researchers produced in a matter of months safe, effective, and reliable vaccines that might have taken years to develop previously, and distributed them across the country. 

And yet there are people so ignorant, so blindly stupid or politically headstrong that they refuse to take the free vaccine that could save their lives and the lives of others. Their reasons for opposing vaccination are many and varied: 

"The FDA hasn't approved the vaccine;" (several different vaccines were approved for use under emergency use authorizations, and the Pfizer vaccine has received formal approval)

"Yes, the FDA has approved the vaccine, but I don't trust the government ... they're just saying it's okay for political reasons;"

"Bill Gates has put microchips into the vaccine that will allow the government to track me and control my life;"

"I don't know what's in that vaccine;" (and yet many are willing to take other medicines, including the veterinary deworming drug Ivermectin)

"I alone can decide what goes into my body;"

"The government can't tell me what to do with my own body;" 

"Jesus is my vaccine;" 

Etc.

Vaccines have eliminated or mitigated dozens of deadly diseases through the years, including smallpox, polio, measles, mumps, chicken pox, rubella, tetanus, and whooping cough, among many others. You can read a full list here. Many of you are alive to read this because of vaccinations your parents made sure you had while you were growing up.

The stupidity is beyond astounding, as is the perceived need to coddle the anti-vaxxers by patiently reaching out to them to gently explain why they should do something that will save their lives and the lives of others. To these idiots, their personal freedom to be stupid is far more important than any responsibility to their fellow citizens.


Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Anti-Vaxxers - individually and collectively - are named as the August 2021 Left-Cheek Ass Clown. Because of their reckless selfishness and the danger they pose to themselves and others, they rate a score of 3,000,000 ghm on the Gohmert Stupidity Scale ... they deserve a higher score, but that's where the scale maxes out.

Have a good day, and get the damn shot. More thoughts tomorrow, on Cartoon Saturday.

Bilbo

Tuesday, August 24, 2021

Stupid Questions


I never cease to be amazed at how many news people, regardless of their network or political affiliation, suddenly become experts on the crisis du jour and ask ridiculously stupid questions during news conferences.

The thing that got me riled up on this topic* over the last week or so was the insistence by news reporters during the daily White House press briefings on obtaining an absolute guarantee from the Biden administration that EVERY SINGLE AMERICAN in Afghanistan would be whisked home to safety. This was usually accompanied by the stern outrage of the chattering classes at the realization that our government doesn't actually know how many Americans there are in Afghanistan.

This is an admission of their stupidity, not the government's incompetence.

How many Americans are there in Afghanistan? Let's see ...

The Defense Department knows how many military personnel are there because they sent them there on orders, feed them, house them, and pay them. The State Department knows how many of its personnel are there because they send them there as official representatives of the US government. The CIA knows how many of its personnel are there because they know everything, ha, ha. Civilian firms working for the government under contract know how many people they have in the country because they're billing Uncle Sam (quite exorbitantly, in most cases) for every one. 

But that's not all the Americans in Afghanistan.

There are also unknown numbers of miscellaneous aid workers, NGO** representatives, missionaries, volunteers, news reporters, tourists***, and other such people running around the country. Why are those numbers unknown? Because the State Department recommends, but does not require, unofficial visitors to foreign countries to register with the local embassy in case of emergency ... like, for example, a Taliban takeover that necessitates evacuation of Americans.

But of course, being Americans who value their personal freedoms above all else, many of those people won't register with the embassy, because they're not fearful sheep blindly following the dictates of a tyrannical government. Of course, when they need to be rescued, it's a different story. 

For all the chaos and bungling of the first day or two of the exodus, there is now a highly-professional airlift underway, executed by the world's finest Airmen† and protected by the world's finest military. I doubt that any other nation on earth could have pulled off an operation of this magnitude ... without the loss of a single American life. Indeed, as Matthew Dowd, who was the chief strategist for the Bush-Cheney ticket in 2004, commented earlier this week, more than 20,000 people have been evacuated from Afghanistan without a single loss of an American life, while in the same period of time, 5000 Americans died from Covid-19 and another 500 from gunshots on the streets of the United States.

I wish a lot of media people who like to hear themselves talk, but don't know what they're talking about, would just shut the hell up, starting with everyone at Fox News and OANN and including self-important clowns like Chris Cuomo on CNN.

That's all. I just felt this needed a rant.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* There are a lot of things, actually, this is just the one that has me pissed off at the moment.

** NGO =  "Non-Governmental Organization," such as the Red Cross.

*** Yes, believe it or not there are people stupid enough to travel as thrill-seeking tourists to dangerous regions.

† I have been very proud to be an Air Force veteran this week.

Sunday, August 22, 2021

Poetry Sunday


The world seems increasingly crazy. Governors place political advantage and the lust for power above public health and safety, politicians rewrite history on the fly in order to avoid their share of responsibility for bad outcomes of failed policies, and individuals insist on the primacy of individual freedom over responsibility for the health and safety of others. I wish Leonard Cohen were still with us, because nobody could write a descriptive, cynically poetic summary of things like he could, as in these lyrics from his 1988 hit ...

Everybody Knows
By Leonard Cohen
 
Everybody knows that the dice are loaded
Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed
Everybody knows that the war is over
Everybody knows the good guys lost
Everybody knows the fight was fixed
The poor stay poor, the rich get rich
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows that the boat is leaking
Everybody knows that the captain lied
Everybody got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died

Everybody talking to their pockets
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
And a long stem rose
Everybody knows

Everybody knows that you love me baby
Everybody knows that you really do
Everybody knows that you've been faithful
Give or take a night or two
Everybody knows you've been discreet
But there were so many people you just had to meet
Without your clothes
And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

And everybody knows that it's now or never
Everybody knows that it's me or you
And everybody knows that you live forever
When you've done a line or two
Everybody knows the deal is rotten
Old Black Joe's still pickin' cotton
For your ribbons and your bows
And everybody knows

And everybody knows that the Plague is coming
Everybody knows that it's moving fast
Everybody knows that the naked man and woman
Are just a shining artifact of the past
Everybody knows the scene is dead
But there's gonna be a meter on your bed
That will disclose
What everybody knows

And everybody knows that you're in trouble
Everybody knows what you've been through
From the bloody cross on top of Calvary
To the beach of Malibu
Everybody knows it's coming apart
Take one last look at this Sacred Heart
Before it blows
And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Oh everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows


And now you know, too.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, August 21, 2021

Cartoon Saturday


It's been another wonderful week, hasn't it? ...

Police on Thursday arrested a North Carolina man who claimed to have a bomb in his truck, which he had parked on the sidewalk in front of the Library of Congress; chaos reigned at the airport in Kabul, Afghanistan, where desperate Afghans who had aided US forces and international agencies mobbed the field in an attempt to escape the victorious Taliban; Republicans moved quickly to rewrite the history of their administrations' roles in creating the Afghan mess; amid surging Covid infections and overwhelmed hospitals, Florida's three major school districts are defying Governor Ron DeSantis's absolute ban on mask mandates; and in Tulsa, Oklahoma, police responding to reports of a dead body washed up on a sandbar in the Arkansas River found a man suntanning, albeit in an unusual place.

This week, in honor of the hysterical news coverage of the situation in Afghanistan, I thought a collection of cartoons about the news and news media would be appropriate ...

It's what they tell each other when the cameras are off ...  


Wait a minute ... what was the Focus of Outrage du Jour? ...


Only up 2 and 7/8ths??? ...


Press Secretaries learn News Conference Management in the first year of Spin School ...


Good advice, especially if you get all your "news" from Fox or OANN ...


Not just in election years ...


I think this is where we're headed ...


I've always wondered about the uses of the Seven Deadly Sins ...


I'd bet this is pretty accurate ...


Why, indeed? ...


It's been an awful week, but I've tried to do my part to help get you past it. I hope I've succeeded, if only a little bit.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts coming tomorrow, when Poetry Sunday takes an entry from lyrics by Leonard Cohen. See you then.

Bilbo

Friday, August 20, 2021

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


The news is all bad, so why not let's have something new to laugh at, eh?

The case has been passed on to the Algerian supreme court, which clearly has not enough to do ...


I think this paper needs a new copy editor ...


Don't bother coming by ...


I don't think it makes the appetizer perfect ... I think you just don't care that it isn't perfect ...


Midnight madness? ...


No questions. Right ...


You have to hope they weren't snapping turtles ...


I don't even know what to say ...


This fellow is having a really bad week ...


I'm not sure I'd put it on a sign ...


And that's it for this week's collection of great moments in editing and signage; I hope you enjoyed it.

Come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday ... more thoughts then.

Bilbo

Monday, August 16, 2021

Who Lost Afghanistan?


"Who lost Afghanistan?" is the question on every set of lips in the chattering classes today. Republicans, predictably, blame President Biden*. Democrats, with somewhat more reason, blame Der Furor for the withdrawal agreement he signed with the Taliban in February of 2020. Neither of these is completely accurate, as you can read in this succinct short history of our Afghan mess from historian Heather Cox Richardson.

In my opinion, though, the real answer is: the Afghans.

The original reason for our military presence in Afghanistan was to root out Al Qaeda and kill Osama bin Laden in the aftermath of 9/11. This mission was accomplished when bin Laden was killed (in Pakistan, not Afghanistan) on May 2, 2011. One could persuasively argue that there was no reason for the US and its allies to keep a military presence in Afghanistan after that date.

But, we thought, having defeated the present threat, we could prevent future terrorism by investing in a strong, vibrant, modern Afghanistan.

The new mission, to the extent it was acknowledged, was to train and equip the Afghan forces so that they could defend their government against the Taliban threat, and modernize Afghan society by educating and empowering the country's women. A strong, modern Afghanistan would prevent the Taliban and al Qaeda from regaining power and using the country as a launching point for future attacks against the US and other nations.

Well, we see how well that worked out.

Not for nothing is Afghanistan known as "the graveyard of empires." The British learned it, the Russians learned it, and now we have learned it. To the extent that modern Afghanistan has ever had a functioning national government, it has been imposed and supported by the military force of occupying powers. Actual power in Afghanistan resides not in Kabul, but at the tribal level, and with the warlords who exercise control at the regional and local levels. The "Afghan government" has never had any real authority beyond the borders of Kabul. If you're interested in the absolutely fascinating history of great power attempts to control Afghanistan, read The Great Game: The Struggle for Empire in Central Asia, by Peter Hopkirk. Although Hopkirk's history ends before the arrival on the scene of the United States after 9/11, his depiction of the competition between Russia and Great Britain for control of Afghanistan is well-researched, well-written, and ... for history ... exciting.  


Make no mistake: I am furious at the shabby treatment of those Afghans who assisted our forces over the years and are now desperately trying to escape a vengeful Taliban. I am heartsick for the Afghan women who will, after a brief taste of freedom and modernity, be shoved back by religious bigots into a medieval role in which they will be kept robed, hooded, and uneducated.

But we can't want a modern, democratic Afghanistan any more than the Afghans want it. We spent 20 years and nearly a trillion dollars** under four presidents (two Republicans and two Democrats) to turn Afghanistan into a Central Asian version of the United States, and yet when the reckoning came, the Afghan military on which we spent so much money folded like a cheap card table, the president fled the country, and the Taliban strolled into Kabul virtually unopposed. We are but the latest in a string of empires that thought they could impose their will on Afghan society. It didn't work for Great Britain, it didn't work for the Soviet Union/Russia, and it took 20 years to accept that it won't work for us. Staying another few weeks, months, or years won't change the outcome.

Who lost Afghanistan? The Afghans have both won and lost ... they've won by freeing their country from external occupation and control, but they've also lost by failing to use the opportunity we gave them to build a thriving, modern state.

And we have, after all this time, won ... in a sad, bitter sort of way ... because we have cut our losses and freed up blood and treasure we can better invest at home.

And that's how I see it.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Republicans were perfectly happy to crow about what a grand statesman Der Furor was when he signed his agreement with the Taliban last year. This is a screen capture from the GOP website (since removed, as Republicans try - as is their wont - to rewrite history):


** And how much infrastructure here at home could we have improved with that money, eh?

Sunday, August 15, 2021

Musical Sunday


This past week saw the death of one of my favorite musicians, the wonderful folk singer/songwriter Nanci Griffith. This video is one of my favorite songs, actually written by Richard Thompson but made into a hit by Nanci from her album "Other Voices, Too" ... she sings it here as a duet with Thompson.



The lyrics remind us that life is like a carnival ride:

You're goin' nowhere 
When you ride on the carousel,
And maybe you're strong,
But what's the good of ringin' a bell?
The Switchback will make you crazy,
Beware of the Bearded Lady - 
Oh, let me take my chances
On the Wall of Death!

I'm going to miss Nanci Griffith - the lady who has more songs on my favorites collection than anyone other than Jimmy Buffett.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, August 14, 2021

Cartoon Saturday


Oy, vay ...

Afghanistan continues to go to hell in a very expensive and tragic handbasket; as the nation once again approaches the debt ceiling, Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell has helpfully announced that Congressional Republicans will not support efforts to raise it, although they happily did so during Der Furor's administration; a California man took his two young children to Mexico and killed them with a spearfishing gun after he claimed he had been "enlightened by QAnon and Illuminati conspiracy theories," according to teachers' union officials, four educators in Florida's second largest school district have died from Covid-19 within a day of each other, even as the state's governor continues to forbid actions which could protect students and teachers from the disease; and in Florida, a major insurance company has gone into liquidation, leaving more than 30,000 people without homeowners insurance as the height of hurricane season draws near.

This week, because of the increasingly bad news about Covid-19 and its variants, I thought we could use some laughs at the expense of the medical profession ...

Well, I guess I can see that ...  


Would you use a different glove, please? ...


Well, perhaps it'll help ...


There have been times when I've wished for something like this ...


Makes sense to me ...


Perhaps they should use aliases ...


You have to read the fine print to know what your insurance will cover ...


They're recommending a powerful infusion of cash ...


Even the dogs are getting in on the insurance copay scam ...


I think perhaps I should do the same ...


And that's it for this week's edition of Cartoon Saturday ... I hope it helped distract you from the ugliness of what we've learned about many of our fellow citizens.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Musical Sunday brings back Kid Creole and the Coconuts.

Bilbo

Friday, August 13, 2021

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2021


I've often complained about how difficult it is to select a single recipient for these awards. There are a number of reasons for this, not the least of which is the enormous number of potential awardees contending for dishonor, but fortunately I have no lack of recommendations from my treasured readers. At the urging of several of you, most notably my friend Gail who is a newly-retired nurse, I am presenting - after a long delay occasioned by other awardees marginally more qualified,  

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2021


to

Senator Rand Paul (R, KY)


There must be something in the Kentucky water that breeds foolishness and hypocrisy, as the Commonwealth of Kentucky is already well-represented by its ten-time winner and three-time Ass Clown of the Year, Senator Mitch McConnell. Senator Paul is working hard to cement Kentucky's grip on absolute numbers of awards, though, having "distinguished" himself by his ludicrous public statements, such as an August 8th video in which he said that "no one should follow the CDC's anti-science mask mandates" and "if a school system attempts to keep children from full-time, in-person school, I will hold up every bill with two amendments: one to de-fund them, and another to allow parents the choice of where the money goes for their child's education." 

During a July 20th Congressional hearing, he insinuated that Covid-19 had been created at a Chinese virology laboratory which was partially supported by US funds. This led Dr Anthony Fauci, the nation's leading expert on infectious diseases, to say, “Senator Paul, you do not know what you’re talking about, quite frankly. And I want to say that officially. You do not know what you’re talking about.”

Senator Paul frequently cites his medical background to lend weight to his opinions on Covid-19 and measures to combat it; however, he is an eye surgeon (if, reportedly, a very good one) with no training or experience in virology - a branch of medicine substantially different from ophthalmology. Such is his irresponsible denigration of the protective effects of masks that Twitter suspended his account for a week; he called the suspension "a badge of honor" and blamed "the leftwing cretins at YouTube."

People are entitled to hold their own opinions. People in positions of power and leadership, however, have a special duty to ensure that those opinions - which may affect the lives of millions of people - are based in facts, science, and data, and not on political expediency or advantage. Senator Paul's reckless disregard of science to the detriment of the health and safety of his constituents and all Americans is disgraceful and deserves the condemnation of all well-informed people of good will. 

Oh, and as if all that weren't enough, this past Wednesday Senator Paul revealed that his wife bought stock in Gilead Sciences — which makes the antiviral drug Remdesivir, used to treat Covid-19 — on February 26th ... his announcement coming 16 months after the 45-day reporting deadline mandated in the Stock Act, which is meant to combat insider trading by Members of Congress and others. The senator' spokeswoman said he had completed the required form to report his wife’s investment last year but only learned that it had not actually been submitted while he was preparing his latest annual disclosure.

And if you believe all that, I have some swamp land in Florida and a bridge in New York to sell you.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2021, is Senator Rand Paul of Kentucky. One can only hope that his career as a Senator will be cut short by those voters in Kentucky who survive his poor advice and leadership on the Covid-19 pandemic.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when Cartoon Saturday takes on the medical profession.

Bilbo