Friday, November 05, 2010

On the Legality of Skirt Length and Exposed Cleavage

Since you, Dear Reader, are probably as sick and tired as I am of election-related stuff, I thought I'd dig back into my Blog Fodder file for something else to write about today. Near the top of the pile is this interesting article from the UK's Guardian newspaper: Miniskirts Ban Planned By Italian Resort.

Well, you know the world as we know it is coming to an end when an Italian town decides to ban miniskirts.

It seems that the mayor of the small southern Italian beach town of Castellammare di Stabia has ordered his police officers to help raise the level of decorum of the town by assessing a fine of 300 Euros (about $425) on women who wear skirts that are too short, or who show too much cleavage. The mayor's guidance to the police on what constitutes a skirt that is "too short" is one which does not fully cover the lady's underwear, and he has confidence in the ability of his officers to apply the law properly, telling an Italian newspaper interviewer that: "They won't need to carry out checks up close, one glance will be enough to judge."

I think I know what the most popular class at the Castellammare di Stabia police academy is.

According to the article, the ban on miniskirts is only one of 41 new measures the mayor has instituted to improve public order. Others bans include swearing in public, kicking footballs in the street, lying on benches, climbing trees, walking a dog with a leash more than two meters long, and wandering off the beach in bathing suits.

In the long-standing tradition of Italian anarchy, we can probably expect soon to see the arrest - in the middle of downtown Castellammare di Stabia - of a lady walking her dog on a three-meter leash while wearing a miniskirt over a bikini and cursing as she kicks a football down the street before lying down on a bench for a nap and then climbing a tree to escape the police.

And in defense of the police, it's probably much safer (and more enjoyable) to check skirt length and degree of cleavage than it is to chase criminals.

As for me, since I enjoy observing beautiful scenery when I travel, I think I'll pass on Castellammare di Stabia for the time being.

Have a good day. Support your local miniskirt.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

6 comments:

  1. Thanks for a good laugh this morning!

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  2. I echo what commenter No.1 said...

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  3. Wait, the definition of a mini skirt is one that shows underwear? Gosh. Those are not the miniskirts i remember. I'm not all for fining people for these...but that does seem oddly short. When they sit down..their..uhh...would...well.. touch chairs and stuff. Ew. Germs in ...uhh...places. 'Nuff said

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  4. Come bigotto! (How sanctimonious!), but I certainly enjoyed your post at their expense!

    Comforting to know that 'leering' (only allowed once glance) is forbidden, too

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  5. "does not fully cover the lady's underwear"

    I think the secret agenda is to get the women to stop wearing underwear.

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  6. I support the ban that says men must wear trousers that don't fall down around there ankles just so they can show us their spiffy boxers.

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