Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Senior Shortcuts

Last Monday in this space I groused about the proliferation of letters, numbers, and combinations of the two as shortcuts for what we used to call "speech" and "thought." I suppose that, as a linguist, I should be excited about the emergence of a new form of communication, but I just can't get too excited about communicating in shortcuts.

Nevertheless, as people like Mike, John, and I view the onrushing advent of geezerhood, I can see that there's something to be said for those shortcuts. After all, if your short-term memory is shot and you can't concentrate on things for very long, there's an advantage in the ability to send short, yet meaningful messages. And - as luck would have it - my old friend Devin yesterday sent me a list of texting abbreviations for senior citizens. Just in time, too! Here's his list:

BTW - Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
DWI - Driving While Incontinent
FWB - Friend With Betablockers
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
FYI - For Your Indigestion
GOML - Get Off My Lawn
GTG - Gotta Groan
IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
JK - Just Kvetching
LOL - Living On Lipitor
LWO - Lawrence Welk's On
OMG - Ouch, My Groin!
ROFL - CGU - Rolling On The Floor Laughing - Can't Get Up
RULKM - Are You Leaving Kids Money?
SUS - Speak Up, Sonny
TGIF - Thank Goodness It's Four (Four O'Clock - Early Bird Special)
WIWYA - When I Was Your Age
WTB - Where's the Bathroom?
WTF - What's Today's Fish?
YYY - Yadda, yadda, yadda

Don't thank me ... it's all part of my ongoing efforts to make life easier and more entertaining for you.

What was I talking about, again?

Have a good day. If you haven't bought my Christmas gift yet, there's still time!

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

6 comments:

  1. LOL! These are too too TOO funny!!!

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  2. GOML...the hallmark of geezerhood!

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  3. Bandit9:19 AM

    There is a similar list going around here and Mike has it. And, thanks for not putting me on your geezerhood list

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  4. The list Bandit sent me similar. I ALMOST posted it last night. Great minds were almost thinking alike.

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