I was pretty sure something had gone wrong.
My iMac is now in the hands of the Geniuses (yes, they call them that) at the Pentagon City Apple Store, where they think the problem is that the power supply blew out. I'll know in five to seven days, when they get the new power supply and test it. I hope that's actually the problem, because if it is, it will only cost $106 to fix. That's a lot cheaper than the cost of replacing the computer.
Ugh.
Anyhow, the Genius I dealt with was very professional and gave me credit for being relatively computer-literate and able to describe the problem without hysterical weeping and gnashing of teeth. She did, though, have me do the paperwork ...
COMPUTER PROBLEM REPORT
1. Describe your problem: _________________________________.
2. Now, describe your problem accurately: _____________________.
3. Speculate wildly about the cause of your problem: ______________.
4. Assess the severity of the problem:
Insignificant __
Minor __
Trivial __
5. Is the computer plugged in?
Yes __
No __
6. Is the computer turned on?
6. Is the computer turned on?
No __
Yes __
7. Have you tried to fix it yourself?
7. Have you tried to fix it yourself?
Yes __
No __
8. Have you made the problem worse?
8. Have you made the problem worse?
Yes __
No __
9. Have you read the manual?
9. Have you read the manual?
No __
Yes __
10. Are you sure you’ve read the manual?
10. Are you sure you’ve read the manual?
Yes __
No __
11. Are you absolutely sure you’ve read the manual?
11. Are you absolutely sure you’ve read the manual?
Yes __
No __
12. Did you understand the manual?
12. Did you understand the manual?
No __
No __
13. If you somehow actually managed to understand the manual, why don’t you fix the problem yourself? ____________.
14. How tall are you? Are you above this line? ___________________.
15. What were you doing with your computer when the problem occurred? ____.
16. If you answered “nothing” to question 15, then explain why you were logged on: _____________.
17. Are you sure you are not imagining this problem?
13. If you somehow actually managed to understand the manual, why don’t you fix the problem yourself? ____________.
14. How tall are you? Are you above this line? ___________________.
15. What were you doing with your computer when the problem occurred? ____.
16. If you answered “nothing” to question 15, then explain why you were logged on: _____________.
17. Are you sure you are not imagining this problem?
Yes __
No __
18. Describe how this problem makes you feel. ___________________.
19. Describe your troubled childhood. _________________________.
20. Do you have any independent, reliable witnesses to this problem?
18. Describe how this problem makes you feel. ___________________.
19. Describe your troubled childhood. _________________________.
20. Do you have any independent, reliable witnesses to this problem?
Yes __
No __
21. Can’t you find something else to do besides bothering me?
21. Can’t you find something else to do besides bothering me?
Yes __
No __
22. Attach copies of your most recent pay stub and income tax return (required so that we can determine if you can afford to fix this problem.
22. Attach copies of your most recent pay stub and income tax return (required so that we can determine if you can afford to fix this problem.
Thank you for helping us understand and solve your problem. Now go away. Don't call us, we'll call you.
I'll let you know how it turns out. In the meantime, I'm hugging my laptop.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
I love the questionaire.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laughs this mornin'
I'm so proud of you for not crawling into a fetal position at the Apple Store. Doing that just doesn't evoke the sympathy it used to.
ReplyDeletePS I NEVER read the manual.
'I was pretty sure something had gone wrong.'
ReplyDeleteI don't know. After all it is a mac. You could have done something really good and it was shooting off some fireworks for you.