Some of the answers can be trememdously funny, or can be groaners, or - sometimes - both ... like most of these, which deal with literary and research aspects of light bulb change ...
A: Five. One changes the light bulb while the other four form a committee and write a letter of protest to the Dean, because changing light bulbs is not professional work.
Q: How many reference librarians does it take to change a light-bulb?
A: (delivered with a perky smile) "Well, I don't know right off-hand, but I know where we can look it up!"
Q: How many book publishers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three. One to change it and two to hold down the author.
Q: How many editors does it take to change a light bulb?
A1: Two. One to ask, "Do we have to get author's approval for this?" and one to actually change the bulb.
A2: Two, one to change the bulb and one to write a rejection slip to the old bulb.
Q: How many proofreaders does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Proofreaders don't change light bulbs ... they just note that the bulbs need changing.
Q: How many writers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to change the bulb and one to tell a long story about it.
A1: Two. One to screw it in almost all the way in and the other to give it a suprising twist at the end.
A2: Three. One to screw in the light bulb and two to figure out a clever plot that explains how the lightbulb died in the first place.
Q: How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Six. One to change the bulb and five to make sure the instructions on how to change the bulb are completely incomprehensible.
Q: How many literary critics does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Literary critics don't know how to change light bulbs, but will find something wrong with the way you do it.
Q: How many literary critics does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Literary critics don't know how to change light bulbs, but will find something wrong with the way you do it.
Any others? Leave me a comment.
On a new topic, time is running out for you to cast your vote(s) for your favorite candidate(s) for Ass Clown of the Year. Balloting closes tomorrow night, December 30th, at 11:59 PM, and the result will be announced on Saturday, December 31st. Vote early, vote often, but vote. It'll be more satisfying than the vote you cast next November ... and will probably have just as much impact on government.
Have a good day. Change a light bulb, so you'll have more light to vote by. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Thanks for the great laugh on what should be a hectic day!
ReplyDeleteMay I write-in another candidate for Assclown of the Year? Sinead O'Conner. She recently made the news by getting married; and the marriage lasting 16 days. Making Kim Kardashian seem like old-fashioned values. Oh, she also got some strange large chest tattoo.
How many bloggers does it take to change a light bulb?
ReplyDeleteNone. Bloggers don't have light bulbs. They work from the glow of a CRT.
How many psychotherapists does it take to change a light bulb?
ReplyDeleteOnly one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.
How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
Three, one to hold the bulb and 2 to turn the ladder.
On general principles, please cast 3 more votes for ass clown of the year to the GOP (that's for my wife, our cat, and me).