Tuesday, April 09, 2013

A Permanent Reminder of a Temporary Feeling


There are a great many things I don't understand, such as color television, Republican economic policies, the mind of Kim Jong-un, and the appeal of the Kardashians. Another is the desire on the part of many otherwise intelligent people to get tattoos.

There are very few tattoos, especially on women, that I find attractive, especially when - after a few years - the colors have faded and the skin has sagged so that what might once have been a work of "art" is now a fadded, blurred smear on the canvas of the body. Most tattoos are, in my humble opinion, hideous, and do nothing to enhance the beauty of a lady or the handsome appearance of a gentleman. On his album Beach House on the Moon, Jimmy Buffett sings a song about tattoos called "A Permanent Reminder of a Temporary Feeling," which pretty much sums it all up.

I thought about the subject of tattoos yesterday when I ran across this article on CNN: "Suffering from 'Tattoo Regret'." The article was written by plastic surgeon Dr Anthony Youn, who has a great deal of experience in removing tattoos from men who finally realized that they really didn't love Annabelle forever, or women who came to understand that the lengthy quotation they had inked on their arm was less intellectual than visually tacky (and, often enough, misspelled*). Dr Youn tells the story of a lady who, when she was a free-spirited young thing in her 20's, got a tattoo on her lower abdomen that she came to regret many years later when she became a grandmother and needed to set a positive example for her grandchildren. ... the tattoo read, "Dinner is served."

A tattoo is one of those things that probably seems like a great idea when one is drunk or stoned, but isn't quite so appealing in the bright light of day. If you need a tattoo, try this one ...


not this one ...


Ladies, please think twice before you get that tacky tattoo**. Invest in some nice clothes instead. You'll thank me later.

Have a good day. More thoughts later.

Bilbo

* In a hilarious skit on the old Smothers Brothers TV show, comic Pat Paulsen was horrified to learn that the huge new tattoo across his chest read "Born too Loose" rather than "Born to Lose."

** Consider what happened to Maud Adams in the 1981 movie Tattoo.

5 comments:

  1. Great advice! I won't have one.

    I get the impression that some people whave drunk way too much before they get theirs.

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  2. Leslie David7:04 AM

    I have a friend whose tattoos really are works of art, but like you I have no desire to be a permanent canvas.

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  3. One of my younger sisters got a tattoo that she regrets terribly.
    I clearly remember my Grandmother asking her where she was putting this flower. She told her just over her right breast. My Grandmother in all seriousness said, "Later in life it will look like that flower has wilted do you really want to do this honey?"

    That made us all laugh about Grandma's concern over gravity. My sister didn't do it because she understood what Grandma was saying. Instead went for a colorful verison of Winnie the Pooh on her ankle which she now regrets as a 39 yr old. She covers it every chance she gets because the cost of removal is the cost of a small car.

    There should be a waiting period like with guns on tattoo's.

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  4. Tattoos are always terrible ideas.

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  5. "Dinner is served" could have just used a sharpy on appropriate nights.

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