Sunday, December 01, 2013

How to Tell Where a Driver Is From


This is an old piece, but it keeps showing up in new versions with new drivers added. Thanks to my friend Bob for sending this latest version of the chart which allows you to tell, at a glance, the place of origin of a driver ...

One hand on wheel, one hand on horn - Chicago.

One hand on wheel, one finger out window - New York.

One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic - New Jersey.

One hand on wheel, one hand paging through newspaper, foot solidly on the accelerator - Boston.

One hand on wheel, one hand gripping nonfat double decaf cappuccino, cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator, and gun in lap - Los Angeles (male).

Steering with knees, one hand gripping nonfat double decaf cappuccino, one hand applying makeup, cradling cell phone, both feet on accelerator, and tiny dog in lap - Los Angeles (female).

Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror - Ohio, but driving in Los Angeles.

Both hands gesticulating wildly in the air, both feet on the accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in back seat - Italy.

One hand on latte, one knee on wheel, foot on brake, playing video game on cell phone - Seattle. 

One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet on the accelerator and both feet on brake, throwing McDonald's bag out the window - Texas.

Four-wheel drive pick-up truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer cans on floor, squirrel tails attached to antenna - West Virginia.

Two white-knuckled hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above dashboard, driving 35 in the left lane on the Interstate with the left blinker on - Florida.


Steering with left knee, right foot keeping accelerator fully depressed, texting with both hands, shouting into cell phone cradled on one shoulder - Washington, DC.

Left lane, 250 mph, headlights flashing to clear oncoming traffic - Germany.

Any other ideas? Leave a comment.


Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

5 comments:

  1. Florence, AL: Two cars approach from opposite directions, stop in middle of street to have a conversation, act annoyed if you come from behind and want the one in your lane to move.

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  2. I really enjoyed those!

    Mostly, people here drive while using cell phones.

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  3. I loved the cartoon at the end!!

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  4. Just a few days ago I was driving next to a woman that was looking at her lap more than the road.

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