Sunday, September 29, 2024

Poetry Sunday


I don't recall where I ran across this poem, and I don't have any other information about the "Annie" who is credited as the author. Nevertheless, it remains as timely now as it was when I found it in early 2021.

“The Enemy Is Within”
(An Acrostic for Nancy Pelosi)
by Annie

D eep Jan 20 sighs of relief
E dged out by fierce reality;
M adam Speaker does not
O rate with exaggeration.
C haos now
R esides in the People’s House
A s elected terrorists
C ircumvent metal detectors,
Y owling threats at “colleagues.”
N ever do we recall blatant
E nemies of democratic rule
E choing, even exaggerating, a
D efeated president’s worst lies,
S ubmerged in hellish unreality.
U ntil we citizens who
S ee what lies ahead
T urn elections
O n all levels toward
D emands for Truth
A nd Comity,
Y esterday will eclipse tomorrow.


Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, September 28, 2024

Cartoon Saturday


Where do these weeks come from, anyhow?

Hurricane Helen hit Northwestern Florida with 140 mph sustained winds and a storm surge described by NOAA* forecasters as "potentially unsurvivable" before barreling inland and killing at least 45 people across the southeast; federal prosecutors on Thursday announced a five-count indictment of New York City Mayor Eric Adams on charges including conspiracy, wire fraud and bribery; the Israeli military said that it killed Hizballah leader Hassan Nasrallah in an overnight attack that flattened an apartment building in Beirut; at least 46 people, including 37 children, drowned while ritually bathing as part of a Hindu religious festival in eastern Indian rivers and ponds swollen by recent flooding; and in Carlisle, Pennsylvania, police responded to a local supermarket and arrested a man who was throwing jars of salsa at customers and employees - he was charged with a taco with a deadly weapon. 

With the election now only weeks away, it seems appropriate to take a cartoon look at the current environment ...

Sad, but increasingly true ...


Der Furor's debate performance scared me; I can imagine how it would traumatize children ...


I imagine that there are a lot of people who would vote for Der Furor no matter what he did ... 


Depends on the outcome of the election, doesn't it? ...


You have to wonder: if the economy is so terrible that people can't afford eggs or gas and have to eat their pets, how is it that they have money to buy red hats, schlocky NFTs, gold sneakers, pieces of debate suits, etc, etc? ...


I've been looking all over for that hellscape, and haven't managed to find it yet ...


That's why they watch Faux News, OANN, and the other extreme networks ...


I'd be rethinking rescue, too ...


I don't think the deal applies to Supreme Court justices, as the supply is too small to meet the demand ...


This year, I think the choice is much harder for the pols to make ...


And that's it for this week ... hope you enjoyed it. 

Have you checked to make sure your voting registration is up to date? Do you have a plan to either vote in person early, vote by mail, or vote in person on election day? The stakes are high ... do your civic duty.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Poetry Sunday returns. See you then.

Bilbo

* NOAA has been recommended for elimination in the GOP's "Project 2025" report ... see page 664, and note the following comment on page 676: "Data collected by the department should be presented neutrally, without adjustments intended to support any one side in the climate debate."

Friday, September 27, 2024

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


Last collection for September ... get 'em while they're hot!

I can't wait to see the ER report on this one ...


Given the way schools are being militarized and politicized nowadays, I'm not surprised ...


It must be one of those ethnic delicacies ...


It seems pointless to me, but what do I know? ...


If you get your information from Faux News or the like, this is how you view the world ...


Seems legit ...


Meatless turkey ... what'll they think of next? ...


I got this one from Mike ... and from several other contributors as well. I have odd friends ...


I'm sure his parents are proud ...


Well, they're not wrong ...


And that's it for our last collection of Great Moments for September. October ought to be good, too ...

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when Cartoon Saturday returns.

Bilbo

Wednesday, September 25, 2024

Accountability in Counting


I don't know about you, Dear Readers, but I'm sick to death of people who are desperate to solve problems that don't exist. Exhibit A at the moment is the Georgia Election Board's insistence on hand-counting ballots after they've been scanned on election day ... they appear to believe in the fantasy that the optical scanners that record votes somehow don't work properly, and that they have to be double-checked by human counters.

What a crock.

Now, I don't know what the precinct-level procedures are in Georgia, but I know what they are here in Virginia, and I don't imagine Georgia is much different. Here's how we ensure the ballot count is accurate in the Old Dominion:

1. On the morning of Election Day, each precinct receives its blank ballots in one or more sealed boxes. The number delivered is an estimate based on the number of registered voters and the anticipated percentage of those that will probably vote. Let's say, for argument's sake, that the box contains 2,000 ballots. Should we run short, the precinct Chief can order more blank ballots as needed. 

2. The box is opened by two people to reveal those 2,000 ballots in shrink-wrapped packages of 100. Before the polls open, one package is opened and the blank ballots are separately counted by two election officers (EOs). We have never, in all the years I've been working elections, had a package of ballots containing an incorrect number ... if the counts don't match, it's always been because one or the other EO made a mistake in counting. The counts are repeated until we're sure they're accurate.

3. New packages of 100 are opened only when the last package is almost empty, and are counted and verified before they are handed out to voters.

4. Ideally, at the end of the day, all the numbers have to match: the number of blank ballots handed out to voters must equal the number of voters who signed in, which must in turn equal the number of ballots recorded by the optical scanners. That number, added to the number of blank ballots that were not issued, must equal 2,000.

Of course, it's never quite that easy. Here are a few things that can complicate that count*:

1. A voter accidentally marks his ballot incorrectly, and asks for a new ballot. In this case, the original ballot is clearly marked "SPOILED," and placed in a separate envelope for accounting before the voter is issued a new ballot.

2. A voter makes extraneous marks or doodles on the ballot that prevent the scanner from reading it. When the scanner rejects it, the voter brings it to the precinct chief, who marks it "SPOILED" and puts it with the other spoiled ballots before issuing the voter a new ballot. 

3. A voter in a hurry shoves her ballot into the scanner and takes off before the scan is complete. If the ballot is rejected by the scanner and we can't catch the voter before she disappears, the ballot is marked "SPOILED" and put with the other spoiled ballots. 

4. A certain number of voters are issued "provisional" ballots for various reasons, such as: the voter registered on election day; the voter’s registration status could not be verified at the polls; or a voter could not (or refused to) provide a valid photo ID. Provisional ballots are not scanned at the precinct on election day, but are sent to the county Board of Elections for adjudication and counting after Election Day. 

So ...

After the polls close, the number of ballots recorded by the scanner may well not - for any number of perfectly valid reasons - match the number of blank ballots handed out, and a hand count of scanned ballots may not match the number of blank ballots handed out to voters. Adding a superfluous hand count of scanned ballots is a useless waste of time, and only provides fodder for those who are desperately looking for a reason to believe in their fever dream of voter fraud.

Bottom line: quit talking about things you don't understand. Cast your vote and trust** the integrity of your fellow citizens who spent the time and effort to be trained in proper voting procedures ... and who, unlike you, took an oath to do the right thing.

Have a good day. Vote. And shut the hell up unless you know what you're talking about. 


More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* This is not an exhaustive list.

** This is the true damage done to the nation by Der Furor and his relentless refusal to accept rejection - the undermining of trust in our institutions and in each other.

Sunday, September 22, 2024

Musical Sunday


It's time for another great, snark-infused song! This week, Jason Kravits presents "The Project 2025 Song," a parody in the classic "Schoolhouse Rock" style ...


When they tell you what they're going to do, believe them. Vote carefully.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, September 21, 2024

Cartoon Saturday


Have you checked to make sure no one has eaten your pets?

Eight people were killed and nearly 3,000 wounded on Tuesday when hundreds of pagers blew up across Lebanon, followed by another wave of exploding walkie-talkies on Wednesday, apparently as part of a coordinated attack on members of the Islamic militant group Hizbollah; music mogul Sean "Diddy" Combs was arrested this week on charges of racketeering, conspiracy, sex trafficking, and transportation to engage in prostitution; the body of a man suspected in the Kentucky highway shooting spree last week has been found in a remote Kentucky wilderness; the Tupperware Company, which produced plastic storage containers frequently used to protect leftovers while they rot in the back of the refrigerator, has filed for bankruptcy; and in Balch Springs, Texas, three lanes of southbound traffic on Interstate 635 were shut down Wednesday afternoon because of alligator and chicken remnants strewn across the roadway ... in a related development, members of the House Freedom Caucus traveled to Balch Springs to examine new ways of bringing legislative activity to a halt.

This week, a look at how we get (and survive) our news ...

Sometimes the monster under the bed is preferable to the one running for office ... 


The old-fashioned town crier has been replaced by the digital shouter ...


It's interesting that his name rhymes with "insanity" ...


Oui! ...


Not everywhere, but too often ...


It's not easy to cope with the mental whiplash ...


I could OD on this one ...


This is an old one, but it underlies much of the appeal of Der Furor's campaign coverage ...


But it won't sell as much of the sponsors' products ...


I sometimes wonder that, myself ...


And that's the way it is (as the famous Walter Cronkite would have said) for this week ... I hope you enjoyed this little poke at the news media.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Musical Sunday returns.

Bilbo

Friday, September 20, 2024

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for September, 2024


It's always been hard to single out individuals (or discrete groups) to recognize as having risen far enough above the average level of ass-clownery to warrant the distinction of this award. This year, it being an election year, the problem is that much worse. But fear not! There are people out there so bent on demonstrating the superiority of their ass clownery that they literally beg to be cited ... and so it is this week.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, with a louder-than-usual blare of trumpets and the heaving of a deeper-than-usual sigh of disgust, we present the award for

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for September, 2024


to (for the second time in as many months)

Senator JD Vance (R, OH)


It's not easy to out-crazy Der Furor, but Mr Vance has made a heroic effort with his continued harping on the story (debunked by everyone in a position to know) that Haitian immigrants in Springfield, Ohio, were stealing and eating the dogs and cats of the local residents as they continued hell-bent on ruining the city and driving out its god-fearing white "Christian" residents. The false story gained worldwide legs when Der Furor included it in his "debate" with Vice President Harris, leading to widespread ridicule from around the world.

It should be noted that the website of the city of Springfield says that approximately 12,000 to 15,000 legal Haitian immigrants live legally in Clark County, as part of a parole program that allows citizens and lawful residents to apply to have their family members from Haiti come to the United States, and that public officials from the Springfield city government up to the Governor of Ohio have said the story is utter nonsense. While acknowledging that the large influx of immigrants is a challenge for the city, they note that hysterical false stories such as those pushed by Mr Vance are singularly unhelpful.

Rather than backing away from the story, though, both Mr Vance and his boss doubled down, insisting that they were receiving reports from real people (although they provided no evidence or details), and that the local officials and the Governor were cynically ignoring the horrible problem to make him look bad.

But then, this past Sunday when CNN's Dana Bash pushed back on the lack of proof of his story of the dog-eating illegal immigrants (who are, in fact, legal), Mr Vance appeared to admit that he'd made up the story ... 

"If I have to create stories so that the American media actually pays attention to the suffering of the American people, that's what I'm going to do."

It should also be noted that the "suffering" to which Mr Vance refers includes the closing of schools and other public facilities because of bomb threats.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the shameful behavior of the GOP Vice Presidential candidate in slandering an entire category of people and causing danger to the public through his ludicrous and - admittedly - false stories of behavior worse than his own make him a standout candidate for this period's tinfoil and toilet paper crown.

There's not much more to say.

Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday, when we take a cartoon look at the news media. See you then.

Bilbo

Thursday, September 19, 2024

Disclaimers, Updated Again


Back in October of 2016, I wrote a post about the proliferation of disclaimers, the warnings that are attached to everything you use, buy, eat, drink, or otherwise come into contact with. Their purpose, of course, is to avoid the possibility of the inevitable lawsuit by someone who took the advice, ate or drank the product, took the medicine, invested the money, suffered whiny butthurt, or whatever, and claimed compensation for some real or imagined injury.


Since that post, the number of disclaimers out there has expanded exponentially as lawyers seek new horizons for enrichment and skittish businesses seek to avoid ruinous lawsuits and the accompanying huge legal fees. I updated the list in December of last year to add some of the newer disclaimers that have arisen, and now it’s time to update it yet again. As a public service, and to keep anyone from suing me over my humble blog, here is an updated compilation of potentially-applicable disclaimers ...

Do not read this blog if you are allergic to ideas other than your own. Views expressed on this blog may be controversial and cause anxiety or discomfort. Objects may be closer than they appear. Some assembly required. Batteries not included. Ensure your heart is healthy enough for sex. See your doctor if your erection lasts more than four hours. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental*. May contain nuts. Information is provided on an "as is" basis with no guarantees of completeness, accuracy, usefulness or timeliness. Prolonged exposure may cause nausea, vomiting, dizziness, dry mouth, flu-like symptoms, gas, headache, insomnia, inappropriate feelings, itching, loss of appetite, confusion, ear pain, agitation, loss of memory, heart palpitations, sweating, tremors, fever, high blood pressure, low blood pressure, increased appetite, decreased appetite, nervousness, skin irritation, or rash. No purchase necessary to win. You must be present to win. A prize of equal or greater value may be substituted at our discretion. Not intended for use by children under 5, or by people who act like it. Use only in well-ventilated areas. Enjoy responsibly. If conditions persist, consult your physician. Do not use machinery or drive until you know how this product affects you. Call before digging. No smoking, matches, or open lights. Serving suggestion. Best by date on package. Package is sold by weight, not volume. Contents may have settled in transit. Void where prohibited. May cause irritability. Subject to change without notice. Close cover before striking. We do not make any representations regarding the use, validity, accuracy, or reliability of this product. Consult a professional advisor familiar with your personal situation for advice concerning specific matters before making decisions. Driver does not carry cash. In no event shall we be liable for any special, indirect, or consequential damages or any damages whatsoever arising from loss of use or profits, whether in an action, contract, negligence, or other tortuous action, arising out of or in connection with the use of the information/data on this site or any sites linked to this site. Other fees and charges may apply. No animals were harmed in the development of this product. Return for store credit only. Slippery when wet. Do not feed the animals. This product is meant for entertainment purposes only. Do not try this at home. Limit one per customer. Cannot be combined with other offers. May not be redeemed for cash. Do not drink directly from bottle. This message, and any attachments, is for the intended recipient(s) only, may contain information that is privileged, confidential and/or proprietary and is subject to important terms and conditions. Not applicable to prior purchases. Terms of use are subject to binding arbitration and a waiver of class action rights as detailed in the appropriate sections of this contract. You agree not to upload, post or otherwise transmit any User Content that you know to be false, misleading or inaccurate**. Investment products are not FDIC insured, are not bank guaranteed, and may lose value, including your original investment. Investing involves risk of loss. No obligation to buy. This flight may be oversold, and you may be denied boarding even if you have a valid ticket. Past performance does not guarantee future performance. If you are not the intended recipient, please delete this message. Users of this financial statement should recognize that they might reach different conclusions about the financial condition of Der Furor. The information on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV. The expert spokesperson guarantees neither the accuracy nor completeness of his/her advice. Do not use this product if you are allergic to it or to any of its ingredients. You might lose some weight. Safe cannot be opened by employees***. Views expressed are those of the writer and are not necessarily those of the management. The following content has been automatically generated by an AI system and should be used for informational purposes only. Use of gendered pronouns should not be interpreted to limit meaning or applicability to other genders unless specifically noted or obvious from context. All sales are final. No foreign or digital currency accepted.

Etc ... 

Have a good day, unless otherwise prohibited by local laws and regulations. More thoughts coming, unless they aren't.

Bilbo

* Unless it's not.

** Not applicable to right-wing “news” outlets, Der Furor, or any Republican Member of Congress.

*** Thanks, Mike.


Tuesday, September 17, 2024

Bilbo's Squeeze-the-Balloon Theory of Political and Economic Promises


As we endure the blizzard of political promises that buffet us from the right and the left in this election season, I thought I'd resurrect my Squeeze-the-Balloon Theory, which can be compared to the old spiritual "Dem Bones." Stripped of all the diagrams and verbiage, the fundamental point is that

Everything's connected

If you listen to any political speeches or read what the parties dare to put into print*, you'll find that they are simply collections of discrete promises. We will lower taxes (on the rich), raise taxes (on the rich), build factories (or bring them back from overseas), create jobs, rebuild infrastructure, build a wall, get rid of Obamacare (or improve it), round up and deport those in the country illegally, beat cancer, support Israel or the Palestinians (or not), support Ukraine against Russia (or not), impose the "Christian" version of sharia law, go to Mars, fight climate change (or forbid any mention thereof), etc, etc, etc. If you're on the far right, those promises are presented in capital letters with multiple exclamation points.

What all these promises, and the actions needed to fulfill them, have in common is that each one is  presented in a vacuum, without consideration of how it relates to all the others. When you squeeze a partially-inflated balloon in one place, it bulges out in another ... 


... thus, my "Squeeze the Balloon" look at political and economic promises. 

Consider this simplified example: 

Workers demand higher wages, consumers demand lower prices, manufacturers demand maximum profits, and stockholders demand maximum return on their investment.

So ...

1. In order to keep profits and shareholder return high and prices low, manufacturers move their production to other countries where labor is cheaper and cost-imposing legal and safety regulations are less onerous than in the United States. 

2. As manufacturing jobs move overseas, domestic factories close and workers lose their jobs.

3. Because laid-off workers now have no income, they cannot afford to buy the products they once made, even at the lower price they originally demanded.

4. Workers without steady income defer necessary medical care or fail to buy health insurance until their conditions become more difficult and expensive to treat. The medical system, straining to treat patients unable to pay for other than emergency treatment (if they can pay for that at all), compensates by raising prices for those who have insurance or can otherwise afford to pay. Medical insurance companies raise their rates, and consumers see their health care costs go up. Further, ill or injured workers aren't as productive as healthy, well-fed ones, which imposes new, less-obvious production costs on their employers.

5. Workers without jobs can't pay their mortgages, buy new homes, or afford ever-increasing rents, which leads to a homeless problem, which leads to health and public safety issues as cities cope with ever-increasing homeless populations.

6. Voters who now have no jobs, income, health care, or places to live vote for candidates who offer scapegoats and simple, one-size-fits-all solutions to their problems**. 

Here's another way to look at it ...

1. Businesses insist that taxes and regulations strangle their viability and profitability.

2. Seeking campaign contributions, politicians promise to slash taxes on businesses and eliminate or not enforce health, safety, and environmental regulations.

3. Falling tax revenue*** must be made up in one of three ways: increase taxes on individuals; cut spending; or borrow money. Each of these has its own drawbacks:

3a. Increasing taxes on individuals (especially at lower income levels), exacerbates the downward pressure on their purchasing power. A corollary of this is the practice in many cities of piling taxes and fees on transient populations that don't vote there (take a look at how many taxes and fees are heaped on your next hotel bill).

3b. Cutting spending always involves reductions in programs that one constituency or another considers vital and will fight tooth and nail to maintain.

3c. Borrowing pushes the pain into the future, when loans and their attendant interest must be repaid with money that has to be raised by increasing taxes, cutting spending, or ... borrowing more money.

4. Eliminating or failing to enforce regulations leads to more workplace injuries and health issues, which lead to lower productivity and increased medical care costs. Eliminating environmental regulations leads to contaminated ground, air, and water, which leads to health problems for workers and - eventually - huge cleanup costs. A corollary to this is the failure to enforce restrictions on monopolies, which invariably lead industries to bypass market pressures and set prices at whatever level they think they can get away with.

What all this means is that THERE ARE NO SIMPLE ANSWERS TO OUR PROBLEMS. Dem bones are still connected. The balloon bulges out at one end when you squeeze the other. Every action generates a reaction†. 

So ...

When you, as Taylor Swift encourages, do your research and decide for whom you're going to vote, don't vote for simplistic, no-pain, pie-in-the-sky promises. Vote for someone who at least has an understanding of how the world works, and how everything is connected to everything else.

Hint: it ain't Der Furor.

Have a good day. Check your voting registration to make sure it's accurate and up-to-date so that no one can challenge your right to cast a ballot. And be sure to do your research and think it all through before you cast that vote. You only get one, so use it wisely.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

P.S. - We haven't even mentioned the question of who will spend long hours of backbreaking labor under the hot sun to pick the fruits and vegetables if all those immigrants are rounded up and deported, and how much the cost of those fruits and vegetables will go up if the pickers have to be paid real wages and provided minimum benefits. Even if you can afford them, those red hats won't provide a lot of UV protection.

B.

* See "Project 2025."

** See "Der Furor," although he's just the worst example.

*** You still don't believe that "trickle-down economics" bullshit, do you?

Newton's Third Law of Motion applies to economics and politics, too.

Sunday, September 15, 2024

Poetry Sunday


I'm not really a cat person (although I'm very fond of Lucy, Loki, and Mobius, our daughter's cats), but I know that many other people are, and that cats are playing an outsize role in this bizarre election season, whether as the companions of JD Vance's despised childless cat ladies, as the food of Haitian immigrants in Ohio (as Der Furor claimed in his "debate" with Vice President Harris), or as the pet of unlikely political powerhouse Taylor Swift. In that vein, how about a poem about our feline friends?

The Cats
by Ann Iverson

To find such glory in a dehydrated pea
on the tile between the stove and fridge.

To toss the needs of others aside
when you simply aren't in the mood for affection.

To find yourselves so irresistible.

And always in a small spot of sun,
you sprawl and spread out the pleasure of yourselves

never fretting, never wanting to go back
to erase your few decisions.

To find yourself so remarkable
all the day long.


Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. And as Childless Cat Lady Taylor Swift has reminded us, an election is coming and the choice is yours to make. Be sure your voting registration is current, do your research, and plan to vote for the candidate of your choice. Choose well.

Bilbo

Saturday, September 14, 2024

Cartoon Saturday

Our vacation is over, and things are back to as normal as they ever are. This means that Cartoon Saturday is back with its introductory summary of the week's noteworthy news ...

Vice President Kamala Harris decisively defeated* Der Furor in their first (and likely only) "debate" of the election season; the crew of the Polaris Dawn spacecraft successfully carried out the first space walk conducted by a civilian astronaut; hurricane Francine went inland after lashing the Gulf Coast with winds and heavy rain; officials in Ohio spoke out against stories of Haitian migrants stealing and eating cats and dogs, a bizarre rumor given a boost when Der Furor cited it as "fact" in his "debate" with Vice President Harris; and in England, the purse belonging to the Police Minister of Great Britain was stolen while she was delivering a speech to a conference of police officials about an “epidemic of antisocial behavior, theft and shoplifting."

This week, another potpourri collection of cartoons for your entertainment. 

Been there, done that ...


I think this fellow should be running for office as a MAGA Republican ...


Yes ... yes, it is ...


Clever camouflage ...


Guess how he's going to vote ...


I think the cats are generally getting pretty pissed off this election season ...


I've lost track of whether Congress or Der Furor has worse image ...


I assume people are the same everywhere ...


A lot of people in Congress seem to be unfamiliar with the Constitution ...


I wonder if it could have happened that way ...


And that's it for another Cartoon Saturday - I hope it helped you get past the weirdness of the past week in politics, economics, and religion.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts coming tomorrow, when Poetry Sunday returns.

Bilbo

* The word "emasculated" has been used by some commentators.

Friday, September 13, 2024

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


With the new month comes new opportunities to recognize editorial and signage mishaps ... how better to celebrate Friday the 13th?

Aren't there laws against that? ...


I'm not sure I want to eat here ...


I'm glad they clarified that ...


Um ... no, thanks ...


The visual effects will probably be lacking ...


I wonder about "Grand Prix" Enterprises ...


This would be my ideal address ...


I guess they get that way when they're whipped and mashed ...


Too soon? ...


Friends with benefits? ...


That's it for today ... if it's early enough, you may still have time to order that cordless massager. I assume it comes in a plain brown wrapper.

Have a good day, and be sure to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo