Saturday, August 31, 2024

Cartoon Saturday


We're on vacation away from wi-fi connections, so there's no news summary for this week. But you need your cartoon fix, and since it can be programmed in advance, you don't need to worry about losing anything. This week, with the election a mere 66 days away, I thought a collection of cartoons about elections would be appropriate ...

This is an increasingly important consideration ...


I wish one were available ...


We're gonna need bigger mirrors, and more of them ...


It's a strong bench ...


They'll find you no matter how you try to hide ...


Machine translation isn't always accurate, but this one's right on the ... money ...


You don't even have to work that hard as long as you've got good super PACs behind you ...


That's just about how the post-Citizens United system works ...


Only the best people ...


A good doctor looks at all the factors contributing to your malaise ...


And that's it for today's election-focused cartoon collection ... I hope you enjoyed it. If you haven't checked your voting registration status lately, I suggest you do it immediately ... with all the proudly-acknowledged chicanery about cleaning up the voter rolls, you don't want to be nefariously dropped before you get to vote.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Poetry Sunday returns.

Bilbo

Friday, August 30, 2024

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


Hey, kids - what time is it? No, it's not Howdy Doody Time, it's time for more great moments in editing and signage ... didn't you read the title of the post?

The adult spouse of a minor ... hmmm ...


I suppose the bone-in neck bone is more expensive ...


Wait, what?? ...


Um ... I'll let Hannibal Lecter know ...


Hmmm ... which restaurant should we choose? ...


Is that higher or lower than 8'-2"? ...


Slow news day ...


"Tinkletorium" ... this should have been at a kindergarten ...


Proofreading is always a good time investment ...


Well, that's a relief! ...


Have a good day and be sure to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday! More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Sunday, August 25, 2024

Musical Sunday


If you're old enough, you may remember the wonderful movie "The Sound of Music," that told the (somewhat embellished) story of the Trapp Family Singers and their leading lady, Maria, who was - to be fair - not quite cut out to be a nun. The sisters at the cloister may not have known how to solve a problem like Maria, but Shirley Şerban wonders how they'd solve a more recent problem ... 


Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. Have you checked to make sure your voting registration is up to date? Do it now!

More thoughts coming. 

Bilbo

Saturday, August 24, 2024

Cartoon Saturday


Excuse me while I try to return this week for a refund. 

Vice President Kamala Harris and Minnesota Governor Tim Walz officially accepted their nominations as the Democratic candidates for President and Vice-President at the Democratic National Convention in Chicago; Der Furor continued to concentrate on personal attacks and invective over policy clarification in his increasingly angry campaign; the FDA has approved two new vaccines targeting the latest variants of Covid-19; Russia continues to reel in the face of an unexpectedly successful Ukrainian attack into Russian territory; and in Kentucky, a man hoping to avoid paying about $116,000 in child support payments has been sentenced to nearly seven years in prison after hacking into state registries to fake his own death, as well as being ordered to pay both the back child support and more than $80,000 to repair damage he caused to the state's death registries. 

It's not that I'm too lazy to do another curated collection, it's just that the no-theme collections seem to be popular ... 

We really did need the Infrastructure Bill ...


Perhaps this is more palatable to the climate-change deniers ...


This is not as funny as it ought to be ...


If FDR only knew ...


This is what drives my wife crazy (other than me, that is) ...


Indeed ...


This also applies to Congressional hearings ...


I wish the "skip ads" button came before the message starts ...


Somehow, I think Der Furor would manage to get away with it ...


Uh, oh ...


And there you go - another collection of cartoons I hope will help you recover from the past week of insanity.

Have a good day and come back tomorrow for some problem solving on Musical Sunday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Friday, August 23, 2024

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2024


August is winding down, the election is drawing closer, and the world teems with ass clowns begging for recognition. Selecting just one for award of the tinfoil and toilet paper crown is a tough and dirty job even a Mike Rowe wouldn't want to take on, but someone has to do it, and so - once again - I have.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, with the usual flatulent blare of trumpets we announce that the title of 

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2024


has been awarded to



The giant aerospace company has suffered a distressingly large number of embarrassing failures in the past few months, from the loss of a door plug on one of its airliners due to failure to install bolts to hold it in place, to the stranding of two astronauts on the International Space Station due to problems with their Starliner spacecraft. Investigations by the NTSB and disclosures from corporate whistleblowers have revealed a culture of emphasis on profits rather than safety, and have led many airline passengers to choose other manufacturers' aircraft because of safety concerns.

The emphasis on profits over other concerns is not limited to Boeing, America's corporate culture being what it is, but the obvious example of an aircraft losing parts in flight sheds a bright and damning light on the profit-at-all-costs motivation. As my wife and I prepare for our upcoming vacation, I'm pleased to note that none of our booked flights involve Boeing aircraft ... although one must wonder how far across the industry the rot may go.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Left-Cheek Ass Clown for August, 2024, is the Boeing Company, the award highlighting not only its own failings but the dangers of corporate greed and arrogance in general.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when Cartoon Saturday returns.

Bilbo

Monday, August 19, 2024

Election Economics for Dummies



There was a time when I might have thought this cartoon was funny. That time has long passed. 

Thanks to Citizens United and other court decisions that have allowed corporations and the wealthy to pour unlimited amounts of money into political campaigns, the old joke about the United States having the best government money can buy is no longer funny, if it ever was. The voices of ordinary citizens are lost, buried under the mountains of money that buy privileged access to lawmakers and make a mockery of the one man, one vote ideal. Do you think that the “$5, $10, or whatever you can afford” you sent in in response to your candidate’s heartfelt plea will buy you the sort of access that an Elon Musk gets? If so, I have a bridge over prime Florida swampland to sell you.

The 2020 election was the most expensive in history, costing an estimated 14.4 billion dollars, with the presidential race costing just under 7 billion and the congressional races making up the remainder. The 2024 election is on track to exceed that obscene amount.

I leave it to your imagination to wonder what that 14.4 billion dollars might have bought for the nation instead of blizzards of simplistic, insulting attack ads and second homes or yachts for political consultants. Education? Health care? Affordable housing? Child care for working families? Dealing with the effects of climate change?* Giving every American their own personal assault rifle** and high-capacity magazine?

My personal opinion is that political campaigns*** at the state and national levels should be funded by the appropriate level of government, through a modest (say, $1 to $5) levy on each taxpayer ... including (at an appropriately higher amount to be determined) the corporations and business entities that our system recognizes as "people" with rights (and responsibilities, but nobody talks about those). Come election time, the available money would be divided up among those candidates who meet basic eligibility criteria (minimum number of signatures on a running petition, for example), to be spent as each candidate wishes. I realize that this is a controversial and complicated issue that will be fought tooth and nail by political parties and those who seek to buy them, but I think it ought to be - at the very least - considered.

American political campaigns are a disgraceful waste of time and of money that could be far better spent improving the lives of our citizens.

But regardless of whether or not you agree with me, make sure you vote - not just in November, but in every election at every level. If you've not done it yet, make sure your voting registration is accurate and up to date so that political lackies can't challenge your rights or arbitrarily remove you from the rolls.

November 3rd is coming. Be ready. And be really, really angry about how much it's costing the nation ... not just in dollars, but in mental anguish.

Have a good day. Vote. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* If you refuse to believe that climate change is real, you can imagine spending the money on something that hidebound conservatives would approve … I suspect, for example, it would buy a lot of Ten Commandments posters and bibles for schoolrooms.

** Yes, yes, I know ... there's no such thing as an "assault rifle" - untwist your knickers. But as a shorthand name for a class of military-grade weapons designed to kill a lot of people quickly and efficiently, it'll do.

*** Not the cost of the administering elections, which would continue to be paid by state and local governments in accordance with the Constitution (Article 1, Section 4, Clause 1). 

† Thanks, Mr Romney. 

Sunday, August 18, 2024

Poetry Sunday


It's autumn, and I'm enjoying the taste of wonderful melons of all kinds. I'm sure, though, that most of us can relate to this cautionary tale of what happens when you forget about that nice melon until it's too late ...

Cantaloupe
by Lee Robinson


Friday I sniffed it
in the grocery store, turned it
in my hands, looking
for bruises
in the rough, webbed rind.
My mother's voice—the one
I carry always in my head—
pronounced it fine. Ripe,
but not too soft.

I bagged and bought it,
would have given it to you
for breakfast—this fruit
first grown in Cantalupo, not far
from Rome. I imagined you,
my sleepy emperor, coming
to the table in your towel toga,
digging into the luscious
orange flesh
with a golden spoon,

and afterwards,
reclining, your smile
satisfied,
imperial.

Now I open the trunk of my car
to find the cantaloupe
still there, flattened, sour,
having baked all weekend
in August's oven.

Grieving is useless,
my mother would say,
Just get another.

But why am I so certain
that no other fruit
will ever be as sweet
as that—

the one
I would have cut in half,
scooped the seeds from,
that one I would have given you
on Saturday morning? 


Have a good day and a great weekend, and don't be ... melon-choly.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, August 17, 2024

Cartoon Saturday


Enough week for you? ... 

The World Health Organization has declared Mopox (formerly known as Monkey Pox) a “public health emergency of international concern;” GOP chair of the House Oversight Committee James Comer has announced that he plans to investigate Minnesota Governor Tim Walz over the Democratic Vice-Presidential candidate's alleged ties to China, hoping to cast doubt on Mr Walz in the service of the flailing Republican ticket; entrepreneur Wally Amos, creator of Famous Amos cookies, has died at the age of 88; in (where else?) Texas, the attorney general has threatened to sue the organizers of the Texas State Fair for banning guns at the event; and in California, the wealthy owner of the Milwaukee Brewers baseball team has been accused of stealing sand from an exclusive beach area in violation of the California Coastal Act to use on a personal construction project at his home, and of “causing a public and private nuisance.”

It's been a while since I cleaned out my box of unsorted and unfiled cartoons, so today seems like a good day to do a no-theme collection. Here we go ... 

Things have changed since I was a Cub Scout ...


It must have been an interesting change of occupations ...


Artists do need to be careful with their work ...


Clerical fears ...


Yes ... yes, it is pretty rare ...


One less thing to be sorrowful about ...


The debate season is coming; here's how to prepare ...  


It's a lesson many nowadays need to learn ...


Parrots have evolved ...


It's good to be the king!


And that's it for another Cartoon Saturday - I hope it helped get you over the trials of the past week. Have a good day and come back tomorrow for Poetry Sunday ... more thoughts then.

Bilbo

Friday, August 16, 2024

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


Ah, yes ... it's that time again, time for more great moments in editing and signage! And awaaaay we go!

A good deal for the man with three feet ...


I predict a rocky future for this marriage ...


I guess it's important to keep the mold up to date ...


Chemical weapons raise the IQ of sheep? Perhaps Der Furor should schedule some rallies near the storage sites ...


It's not the diet I'd have recommended for teenagers, but I guess that nutritional guidelines can change over time ...


I've been going to the wrong barber shop ...


I could use the jacket, but what would I do with three tons of pig starting products? And what are they, anyhow?


I hear they're looking for a proofreader ...


The child (12 and under) is a good choice ... 13 and over tend to be tough ...


I wonder if they have a couch available ...


That's it! Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. See you then with more thoughts.

Bilbo