Great Moments in Editing and Signage

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, today is the last collection of Great Moments for 2025! I know this will be unwelcome news for those of you who look forward to these posts, but such is the arrangement of the calendar, so let's dry those tears and get on with it ... and look at the end for the first report of results from the Ass Clown of the Year competition!

If you're still looking for a gift for that hard-to-please person who can't make ends meet ...

Such a deal! Stock up now ...

For that vocal supporter of Der Furor on your list ...

If it's a Florida avocado but it comes from Canada, do the tariffs still apply? ...

The very soul of Christian charity ...

I guess foot long yogurt hot dogs are a thing in Greece ...

Why pay more? ...

Anyone looking for a job as a copy editor at a newspaper, apply below ...

I'm sure the price is right, though ...

Please be sure your dog carries enough bags ...

And that's it for Great Moments in Editing and Signage for December AND for 2025 ... I hope we've managed to give you a chuckle. Don't be too sad ... we'll be back on January 2nd with a new collection to start out 2026.

But before we go, here are the standings for the top three vote-getters in the 2025 Ass Clown of the Year competition:

In third place with 3.14159 votes (yes, you read that right - pi - votes) - Kristi Noem's Dog;

In second place, tied with 100 votes each - The Congressional GOP, Der Furor's Enablers, and House Speaker Mike Johnson; and,

In first place with 300 votes each, a tie between Der Furor and Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth.

Voting for the Ass Clown of the Year continues until 11:59 PM on Wednesday, December 31st - make sure your voice is heard by voting early and often! Check here for the full list of rules and the Ass Clowns that have been selected through the year.

Have a good day and be sure to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday - more thoughts then.

Bilbo

Voting Is Now Open for the 2025 Ass Clown of the Year!

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, today is the start of the two-week period in which you can cast your votes for the individual or group that best exemplifies the year's supreme achievement in ass clownery, and (possibly) unseats the 2024 winner, The American Electorate. It's time to vote for

The 2025 Ass Clown of the Year

By Friday, December 26th (the announcement of the final awardee for the year, the Left-Cheek Ass Clown for December), I will have named 33 awardees in 2025, all of whom are eligible for the annual award. Of course, if there's someone I missed or someone you like better, you are free to vote for the write-in candidate of your choice. Here are the ground rules for Ass Clown of the Year voting, unchanged from previous years except as noted:

- Chicago Rules apply: you may vote as many times as you want, for as many candidates as you want. You may cast votes on behalf of yourself, your family members, your friends, your family members' friends, your pets, your friends' and family members' pets, or anyone else, living or dead. In the interest of fairness, I ask only that you not cast more than 100 votes at a time for any one candidate (same as last year) ... just vote more often if you want to stuff the digital ballot box. 

- You may vote for any of this year's 33 award winners (the first 32 are listed below, and the last will be announced on December 26th), or for anyone else you wish. 

- You need not be legally authorized to vote in the United States. Republicans view voting laws with a great deal of flexibility to their advantage, so why should you not follow their example?

- No ID is required and there is no minimum age to vote. If you are concerned that the Russians (or Elon Musk, or the Chinese, or the Venezuelans, or the Italians (via satellite), or the Martians or one or the other political party, or the "Deep State") will manipulate the results to undermine the integrity of the award without such identification, consider that the fanatical supporters of Der Furor are already convinced that elections they don't win are rigged and will assume that any IDs presented will be phony, anyhow. And in any case, integrity is a quaintly outdated concept in today's political world in which "facts" require no proof or connection to reality. I worry more about my fellow citizens than I do about any external actors.

- Finally, you again have the option to vote for ALL OF THE ABOVE, rather than a single winner.

- Votes will be accepted from now until 11:59 PM on Wednesday, December 31st. You may vote by leaving a comment on this or any blog post between now and then; by sending me a PM or leaving a comment on Facebook or Bluesky if we are connected there; by e-mail if you have my personal address; by text message if you have my phone number; or in person if we should happen to meet and you are unarmed and properly vaccinated. If you choose to cast your votes in person, be advised that your candidate's chances of winning are enhanced if the votes are accompanied by adult beverages, desirable snacks (list available on request), cash, or any combination thereof. Yes, it's bribery, but if Elon Musk and all those other billionaires slurping at the government trough can do it, so can you.

I will provide periodic updates on the balloting, and will announce the 2025 Ass Clown of the Year in this space on Thursday, January 1st, 2026.

To help you make your choice, here are links to the first 32 Ass Clown awardees for 2025*, in case you want to go back and review their qualifications to assist in making your choice:

January Right-Cheek: America's Billionaire Class

January Left-Cheek: Elon Musk

February Right-Cheek: The Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE)

February Left-Cheek: "Vice President" JD Vance

February Special Award: The Republican and Democratic Parties

March Right-Cheek: Secretary of State Marco Rubio

March Left-Cheek: Joaquin Garcia

March Special Award: The "National Security Establishment" of Der Furor's Administration

April Right-Cheek: Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth

April Special Award: Der Furor and His Economic Advisors

April Left-Cheek: The American Legal Profession

April Special Award: Der Furor's Obsequious Cabinet

May Right-Cheek: Attorney General Pam Bondi

May Left-Cheek: DHS Secretary Kristi Noem

May On-Crack: White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt

June Right-Cheek: Attorney General Pam Bondi (second award this year)

June Left-Cheek: Emil Bove

July Right-Cheek: Speaker of the House Mike Johnson (R, LA-4)

July Left-Cheek: The Republican Regrets Coalition

August Right-Cheek: Christopher Robertson

August Left-Cheek: Nick "alpha male" Adams

September Right-Cheek: Robert F. Kennedy, Jr

September Left-Cheek: Laura Loomer

September Special Award: Der Furor and Pete Hegseth (second award this year for both individuals)

October Right-Cheek: "Border Czar" Tom Homan

October Special Award: Attorney General Pam Bondi (third award this year)

October Left-Cheek: Ten Violent and Racist "Young" Republicans and Vice President JD Vance (second            award this year for Vance)

October On-Crack: Newt Gingrich, Kevin McCarthy, Mike Johnson, and Mitch McConnell (second award         this year for Johnson)

November Right-Cheek: The US Department of Agriculture

November Left-Cheek: Der Furor's Governmental Clown Car

December Right-Cheek: The Federation Internationale de Football Association (FIFA)

December Left-Cheek: to be announced on December 26th - check this site then!

These are your candidates! It's up to you, now ... vote early, vote often, and make sure your voice is heard and your chosen ass clown is recognized for appropriate ridicule and receipt of the Tinfoil and Toilet Paper Crown**, which has been presented to each ass clown awardee since the 2022 annual winner - 

Although the run on tinfoil hats by the MAGA crowd and the panic-buying of toilet paper ahead of winter storms may lead to temporary shortages of raw materials, I'll make it work. 

Have a good day, vote early, and vote often. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Some of the individual recipients have won the award multiple times by being part of group awards. I have not detailed individual membership in group awards during the year in the interest of space.

** A far more prestigious award than the silly FIFA/Temu Peace Prize gifted to Der Furor earlier this month.

Woke Fonts

You probably don't think very often about the art of typography, which deals with the style and appearance of printed matter. For someone like me, who appreciates the appearance and legibility of the printed word, it's very interesting, but not something I'd normally associate with the silly culture wars fanned by Der Furor and his followers ... but such is the time in which we live. 

Last week the State Department changed its policy on printed material to mandate use of the Times New Roman font for official documents. Times New Roman was the standard font used by the State Department from 2004* to 2023, when then-Secretary of State Antony Blinken directed a change to Calibri, considered more user-friendly for people with reading challenges and those who read documents online, thanks to its simpler shapes and wider spacing. Here's a side-by-side comparison of the two fonts:

I, myself, prefer Times New Roman as more official and elegant looking, and it's the font I use for documents I create myself, although I can see that Calibri could be easier for some people to read. 

As you might suspect, the change back to Times New Roman was couched in terms of the administration's rejection of what it believes are wasteful and inappropriate "DEIA" (Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Accessibility) influences and initiatives across government. This is, in my opinion, a silly reason to change fonts. If the goal is an official-looking font that's more legible and less simplistic than Calibri, perhaps Garamond might have been a better choice ...

Then again, given the frequently childish and silly actions of Der Furor and his administration, a change to Comic Sans might have been more appropriate ...

Another possible choice for an official font for this administration might have been Fraktur, which would excite the Neo-Nazi fever dreams of the farthest-right wing of the MAGA movement ...

Or, given the leanings of the recently-released National Security Strategy, we could just go directly to the Cyrillic font used for Russian -

Petulantly changing typefaces. The silliest manifestation of the culture wars to date. Sigh.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Before 2004, the standard font for the State Department was Courier New.

The GOP Replacement for Obamacare, 2025*

You will recall that Der Furor and the Republican Party have for years been desperate to get rid of the imperfect, but reasonably successful and popular Affordable Care Act (also known as Obamacare). Der Furor was famous during his first term for repeatedly saying that a better, cheaper alternative was just two weeks away, and during the last presidential campaign he memorably claimed not that he had a replacement plan, but rather "concepts of a plan."

Now, as you no doubt know, the GOP's "One Big Beautiful Bill Act**," signed into law by Der Furor on July 4, 2025, has eliminated the tax credits for health insurance premiums, meaning that in a matter of weeks, those premiums will go through the roof - anywhere from double their current cost to ... well ... you didn't need to eat and live indoors, anyhow. Congressional Republicans had carefully planned to let this bad news surface after they'd prevailed in next year's midterm elections, but they realized too late that voters were going to learn the unpleasant truth inconveniently early.

Oops. 

Well, as it turns out, Congressional Republicans have been feverishly working on something like a plan to replace Obamacare ... and thanks to a highly-placed source, I have obtained a copy! 

The new plan was drafted by a staff of noted medical experts under the direction of esteemed medical professional Not-a-Doctor Robert F. Kennedy, Jr, assisted by Doctors No, Who, Doolittle, Phibes, Kevorkian, Fu Manchu, Doom, Zhivago, Faust, and Demento; highlights include:

- Copies of the Bible (Trump edition only) will be used as guidance for proper nutrition, hygiene, and appropriate sexual behavior; each insured patient must purchase a separate copy when signing up for coverage.

- Abortions are strictly forbidden unless to protect the life and reputation of the father.

- The only approved form of birth control will consist of poster-sized photographs of angrily-frowning nuns prominently posted in each bedroom and classroom from kindergarten through university.

- Patients requiring anesthesia will be offered three choices: a shot of whiskey (bar brands only), a bullet to bite on (no larger than .22 caliber), or a Louisville Slugger to the head.

- Annual breast exams for women will be scheduled during non-peak hours at the nearest Hooters.

- Reconditioned dialysis machines previously used at Jiffy Lube are authorized for low-income patients.

- Second opinions on diagnoses will be reached by multiplying the initial treatment estimate by 0.50. Insurance reimbursements will be based on the lower number.

- All lower-cost alternative treatments must be exhausted before more expensive ones are considered.

- Annual vision exams will consist of counting the patient's number of eyes. If the number is two, the patient passes. If the number equals one, the patient's vision is considered adequate. If the number equals zero, it's a pre-existing condition not covered by insurance.

- Rectal thermometers may be reused if sanitized by wiping them with wadded newspaper.

- The standard initial treatment for all medical complaints is, "Take two leeches and call me in the morning."

- Generic drugs will be used to treat generic diseases.

- Voodoo practitioners may be licensed to provide injections approved as a course of treatment.

- Dentists will be required to fill cavities with spackling compound; dental x-rays will be replaced by charcoal sketches.

- Medical imaging consists of the doctor carefully photographing the patient with a Kodak Brownie; development of the prints is not covered by insurance. X-rays, when prescribed, will be performed by physician assistants using X-ray specs.

- Cat Scans will be conducted with real cats (feral alley cats for low-income patients).

- Tongue depressors are no longer required to be free of Fudgesicle traces before use.

- Well-baby care consists of a doctor conducting a visual examination and certifying that "well, it's a baby."

- Radiation treatment for cancer patients consists of one-way tickets (coach class) to Chernobyl or Fukushima (insurance company's option).

The plan also contains a detailed fee structure for calculating the cost of care:

Well, MAGA, you voted for it, you've got it - the Obamacare Replacement Plan! In summary, it says,

Don't get sick. If you do, die soon.

Good luck.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* This is an update of a post I wrote and published last year about this time ... which, in turn, was an update of a post I wrote and published in 2011, in case you'd forgotten how far back GOP opposition to quality, affordable health care - and inability to come up with something better than Obamacare - goes.

** Although the law is popularly referred to as the One Big Beautiful Bill Act, this official short title was removed from the bill during the Senate amendment process. Therefore, the law officially has no short title.

Musical Sunday

We're a mere 11 days from Christmas, and this will be the only Musical Sunday before the holiday, so I thought I'd better dig out one of my favorite Christmas tunes for this post - the beautiful tune "Brightest Star," by Chris Isaak ...

Here are the lyrics:

I saw a star above the clouds

It was the brightest one

And I have just begun

To understand you

You give me reason to believe

And though I've doubted you

You always see me through

I would owe to you

Your love

You give it away

I fall to my knees and I pray

And from a cross

They say you give your love to everyone

I think of all I've done

And still you care for me

Your love

You give it away

I fall to my knees and I pray

Your love

(Your love)

(I fall to my knees and pray)

And in the crowd I smile and listen

As the children sing

Their voices caroling

Each year, it means one thing

Your love (your love)

You give it away (you give it away)

I fall to my knees and I pray

Your love (your love)

Your love (your love)

I praise your love (I praise your love)

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

Whatever happened to that Christmas spirit?

During an interview with Politico, Der Furor rated the US economy "A-plus-plus-plus-plus-plus;” the annual threat assessment prepared by Denmark’s military intelligence service raised concerns about the United States, saying that “The United States uses economic power, including threats of high tariffs, to enforce its will, and no longer rules out the use of military force, even against allies;” the administration has threatened new sanctions against the International Criminal Court if it does not amend its founding documents to ensure it does not prosecute Der Furor and other US officials for war crimes after the end of his presidency in 2029; US forces seized an oil tanker in international waters off the coast of Venezuela; a second grand jury has refused to indict New York Attorney General Letitia James, in a blow to Der Furor's revenge campaign; and the International Committee of the Red Cross is warning that popular AI models not only point some users to false sources but also cause problems for researchers and librarians, who waste time looking for requested records which do not exist and have been accused of hiding "secret" materials. 

Since Christmas is a mere 12 days away, I figured a collection of Christmas-themed cartoons would be appropriate ...

It's a good business to be in at the right season ...

Children are pretty savvy about Christmas nowadays ...

There's a Venn Diagram for every need and season ...

The untold story of the Great Magi Gift Dispute ...

I feel the same way ...

I wonder how the automated toll transponders compare number of axles with single horses ...

Been there, experienced that ...

This year, he's gonna need a bigger boat ...

I surely hope Santa will be able to avoid all the ICE raids long enough to deliver all the gifts ...

Considering that Der Furor loves the fossil fuel industry (in particular its campaign contributions), I'd think he'd be really into coal deliveries for everyone ...

And that's our collection of Christmas cartoons for this seasonal Saturday - I hope you enjoyed them.

Have a good day and a great weekend. Be careful in the stores. More thoughts tomorrow, when Musical Sunday salutes Christmas, too. See you then.

Bilbo

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for December, 2025

The last month of the year has arrived, and with it the need to select the final two ass clowns of 2025 (more if a special award becomes necessary). 

If you've read, watched, streamed, or heard the news over the last two weeks, you know that the level of noteworthy ass clownery has skyrocketed each month, making it extraordinarily difficult to select winners. Nevertheless, I opened this can of worms with the first Ass Clown Award back in 2011 (presented to Der Furor, believe it or not), and I'll continue to do my duty to shine the light of shame on deserving winners.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, I present the award for

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for December, 2025

to

Federation Internationale

de

Football Association*

FIFA is the world governing body for the sport of football, or "soccer" as it's known in the United States. Until this year, the primary functions of FIFA were to encourage and standardize worldwide play of the sport and oversee the planning and execution of the World Cup championship every four years.

In 2026, the World Cup games will be held in the United States, Mexico, and Canada, and the ceremony to draw initial match assignments was held at the Kennedy Center in Washington, DC, last week. This is normally an event of only minor interest (except to the national football teams, of course), but this year the event drew great attention because of its detour into shameless political point-scoring when FIFA President Gianni Infantino presented the first-ever "FIFA Peace Prize" to Der Furor.

It's no secret, of course, that Der Furor desperately wants a Nobel Peace Prize and has loudly proclaimed his desire and supposed qualifications for the award at every opportunity, taking credit for "ending" any number of "wars" in the last year (the number varies with his mood). The decision by Mr Infantino to invent his own "peace prize" and present it to his longtime friend was not only a transparent attempt to flatter a man widely known for his vanity and lust for praise and recognition, but also an investment in trying to minimize the negative impact of the administrations aggressive immigration control policies on attendance at and participation in the hugely profitable World Cup games. Der Furor, for his part, wasted no time in snatching up the medal and ribbon and hanging them around his own neck

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for December, 2025, is presented to the Federation Internationale de Football Association (FIFA)  (FIFA) and to its director, Gianni Infantino, for their attempt to curry favor with Der Furor with a meaningless award created only to appeal to his ego and endless desire for flattery.

Have a good day and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday - this week with a Christmas theme.

More thoughts then.

Bilbo

UPDATE: On Tuesday of this week, after I'd finished drafting this post, FairSquare, a London-based human rights nonprofit that focuses on sports, said it had filed ethics complaints alleging breaches of FIFA’s statutory duty to be politically neutral and requesting an investigation into Gianni Infantino’s "peace prize" award to Der Furor. Good luck with that.

B.

* In English, the International Federation of Association Football.

Fear and Obey

When addressing the Supreme Court this past Monday in the case of Trump v. Slaughter, Solicitor General D. John Sauer argued that a president requires absolute power and control over all members of the Executive Branch, including the power to fire the heads of independent agencies, in order to fulfill the mandate given to him by the voters who put him in power. In response to a question from Justice Kavanaugh, Mr. Sauer emphasized the importance of this power, saying that:

"... the President's removal power is what is dictated by the Constitution, that the President must have the power to control and that these agencies -- the one who has the power to remove is the one who -- is the person that they have to fear and obey."*

Fear and obey.

These three words summarize the implications of the so-called unitary executive theory beloved by the administration, and illustrate the reason we need to remember why we declared independence from a king 250 years ago.

Kings and dictators rule by fear to enforce obedience, because they have no legitimacy other than the raw power that keeps them in office. In the United States, until the dawn of Der Furor's reign, presidents generally ruled by listening and responding to the needs and desires of the voting public ... both those who voted against them and those who voted for them. Der Furor has made it abundantly clear on many occasions that he is interested only in the needs, desires, and welfare of those who voted for him ... and that only so long as they continue to unquestioningly support him.

This is the future that looms as the Supreme Court debates this case. It has already granted Der Furor immunity from oversight and legal accountability in the case of Trump v United States**, and it will continue this march to dictatorship if it finds, as it appears likely to do, that he has the power to fire any executive branch employee at any time, for any reason (or none). For a superb analysis of where this could all go, read this article by Harry Litman in the Talking Feds Substack, which concludes,

"The Court will destabilize the architecture of modern governance and then step back as if it had merely rearranged the furniture. The cost of this rollback of much of the administrative state will be borne by all the people who have greatly benefited from the political insulation and expertise of independent agencies for the last 100 years – that is, all of us."

Fear and obey. 

Next time you cast a vote, consider whether this is the sort of future you really want for your children. And my grandchildren.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Trump v. Slaughter transcript, page 55, lines 10-15.

** Certainly the most aptly-named SCOTUS case ever.

The National Security Strategy, 2025

This past week, with none of the fanfare that has accompanied past releases of the document, Der Furor's administration released its 2025 National Security Strategy. 

The National Security Strategy (or NSS), released annually, explains an administration's view of the challenges the United States faces around the world and provides the framework around which government agencies are expected to plan their activities to implement the president's national security vision. As you might expect from an administration largely staffed with unqualified and incompetent people, the 2025 NSS is a mess, described by one commentator as seeming to have been written by either a fourth-grader or AI. Reading it, you might be excused for thinking the cover should have read a bit differently - 

First of all, as anyone who has watched one of Der Furor's Cabinet meetings could have expected, the document is heavy on effusive praise of the matchless accomplishments of the Supreme Leader ...

"President Trump has cemented his legacy as The President of Peace. In addition to the remarkable success achieved during his first term with the historic Abraham Accords, President Trump has leveraged his dealmaking ability to secure unprecedented peace in eight conflicts throughout the world over the course of just eight months of his second term." (Page 8)

"President Trump has set a new global standard" (Page 12) 

"[The] “Trump Corollary” to the Monroe Doctrine is a common-sense and potent restoration of American power and priorities" (Page 15)

"President Trump single-handedly reversed more than three decades of mistaken American assumptions about China" (Page 19) 

"President Trump is building alliances and strengthening partnerships in the Indo-Pacific that will be the bedrock of security and prosperity long into the future." (Page 19)

"President Trump’s May 2025 state visits to Persian Gulf countries demonstrated the power and appeal of American technology." (Page 23) 

"The Israeli-Palestinian conflict remains thorny, but thanks to the ceasefire and release of hostages President Trump negotiated, progress toward a more permanent peace has been made." (Page 28) 

"President Trump’s ability to unite the Arab  world at Sharm el-Sheikh in pursuit of peace and  normalization will allow the United States to finally prioritize American interests." (Page 29) 

You could be forgiven for thinking that there's no need for any government other than the all-powerful genius of Der Furor.

While claiming to have "rebuilt our alliances" (Page i), this president has thoroughly wrecked our international standing and insulted and alienated traditional allies who now decline to share intelligence information they fear may be used to facilitate war crimes ... as if we were in an actual war Constitutionally declared by Congress.

I could go on, but I call your attention to this excellent article by Eliot Cohen in The Atlantic, which discusses the incoherence and idiocy of this NSS while acknowledging that it does contain "three ideas that, stripped of the rants and the brownnosing, are important and at least partially true*." You may also be interested in this article by Jason Horowitz from the New York Times, which looks at the "strategy" in terms of its showcasing of Der Furor's contempt for European leaders.

The "National Security Strategy for 2025" demonstrates how, in the space of a mere 11 months, one shallow, spiteful, unserious man ignorant of all but his own prejudices, aided and abetted by a servile Congress and a loftily arrogant Supreme Court, has destroyed our standing in the world and our reputation as a reliable ally.

Have as good a day as you can consistent with the destruction of our international reputation and the debasement of competent and accountable government.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* These are: (1) acknowledgement of the importance to the United States of the Western Hemisphere; (2) a change in approach to African nations from direct development aid to improvement in commerce; and (3) emphasizing the threat of uncontrolled mass migration to European nations.

The Cost of the Twelve Days of Christmas, 2025 Edition

One of the most popular traditional Christmas songs is "The Twelve Days of Christmas," which documents the cascading list of gifts "my true love gave to me" over the course of twelve days. Each year at this time, various banks and other organizations estimate the cost of the gifts, which ends up being ... well ... pretty substantial. According to PNC Bank, the total cost of the Twelve Days of Christmas for 2025 - counting the repetition of the gifts in each verse of the song - is $218,542.98, up 4.4% from last year.

That's all well and good, but I think that this year, we need to look at the gifts of the twelve days of Christmas in a manner that actually reflects the current political and economic environment ...

The traditional gifts are:

A Partridge in a Pear Tree;

Two Turtle Doves;

Three French Hens;

Four Calling Birds;

Five Gold Rings;

Six Geese a-Laying;

Seven Swans a-Swimming; 

Eight Maids a-Milking;

Nine Ladies Dancing;

Ten Lords a-Leaping; 

Eleven Pipers Piping; and,

Twelve Drummers Drumming.

Let's see how they're all faring this year.

First of all, scratch the Partridges, Turtle Doves, French Hens, Calling Birds, Geese, and Swans. The Centers for Disease Control, under the "direction" of Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Jr, has deemphaized research into and emphasis on the development and employment of vaccines that control diseases like ... bird flu. Thus, birds - as potential carriers of deadly avian-borne diseases - should be eliminated from the gift list.

Forget the Pear Trees ... Der Furor's Executive Order 14225 of March 1, 2025 ("Immediate Expansion of American Timber Production") opened up huge stretches of forests to commercial logging, which means that pear trees will be in increasingly short supply and their cost will skyrocket. 

Maids a-Milking are in short supply, as many of the people working in such low-level farming jobs have questionable immigration status and have either been scooped up and deported in ICE raids, voluntarily returned to their home countries, or gone to ground so as not to draw attention to themselves. If you can find any, you can probably get them cheap, although you'll risk prosecution for harboring criminal illegal aliens.

Dancing Ladies, Pipers, and Drummers are decreasing in number as a result of the administration's slashing of support to music and the arts. Those that remain may be willing to work at reduced rates just to have jobs.

Gold Rings remain a viable gift, but have been overshadowed by emphasis on cryptocurrencies and, for the MAGA faithful, by the $TRUMP memecoin as an expression of their slavish devotion to Der Furor and his relentless monetization of the presidency. "Five Trump memecoins" still follows the rhythm of the original song.

Finally, there should be plenty of Lords a-Leaping available for this year's Twelve Days of Christmas list. Der Furor's Executive Order 14351 of September 19, 2025, established the "Trump Gold Card" program to "facilitate the  entry of aliens who have demonstrated their ability and desire to advance the interests of the United States by voluntarily providing a significant financial gift to the Nation" - such gifts to start at a minimum of $1,000,000. This will encourage not only "lords" (with traditional hereditary titles and inherited fortunes) but plenty of otherwise unremarkable and often boorish ... or even criminal ... nouveau riche whose only qualification for citizenship is wealth with which to buy it. 

I'm sorry, but "The Twelve Days of Christmas" is probably not a very good holiday song this year. Better luck in 2026.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Poetry Sunday

We're into the Christmas season, where - in better times - we celebrated peace on earth, good will toward men*, care for the stranger, and all that other schmaltzy stuff. But this year, Christmas is marked by a relative absence of good will, especially on the part of Der Furor's adoration society, and so I've decided to feature today a Yuletide poem more suited to the current political reality ...

Yule Horror**

by H. P. Lovecraft

There is snow on the ground, 

And the valleys are cold, 

And a midnight profound 

Blackly squats o'er the wold;

But a light on the hilltops half-seen hints of 

     feastings un-hallowed and old.

There is death in the clouds, 

There is fear in the night, 

For the dead in their shrouds 

Hail the sin's turning flight.

And chant wild in the woods as they dance round

     a Yule-altar fungous and white.

To no gale of Earth's kind

Sways the forest of oak,

Where the sick boughs entwined 

By mad mistletoes choke,

For these pow'rs are the pow'rs of the dark, from 

     the graves of the lost Druid-folk."

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend, and hang in there ... I'll get back to more seasonal thoughts in future posts.

Bilbo

* "Men" is used in its non gender-specific meaning, of course.

** This poem was first published in Weird Tales magazine in December 1926, and was later renamed "Festival."

Cartoon Saturday

So much for December improving on November ... 

After describing himself as "The Affordability President" just last week, Der Furor has changed his opinion and described affordability as a "Democrat hoax" and a "con job;" Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth is under fire for possible charges of murder or war crimes after news broke of a deliberate attack on survivors of a previous attack on a boat allegedly carrying drugs; Netflix has announced plans to purchase the film and streaming business of Warner Brothers for $72  billion, which would create a new entertainment behemoth; Der Furor was presented with the first-ever "FIFA Peace Prize," which is unusual considering his well-documented disgust with the sort of foreigners who may visit the US for the World Cup games; the administration has published an updated and incoherent National Security Strategy which describes national security in terms of business deals and great power spheres of influence; and a 73-year-old Mississippi man is facing charges in Louisiana for allegedly trying to buy a baby from her mother at an auction house.

The first Saturday of December brings with it the first cartoon collection of the month!

I can totally relate to this one ...

And to this one, too! ...

And I think we can all relate to this one ...

It's probably a constant problem ...

Now, that's some world-class reddin' up, as we used to say back home in Pittsburgh ...

Watch your step ...

We do this expedition about once a year, usually in PPE ...

Somebody is watching too much "Game of Thrones" ...

I wonder if they saw that one coming ...

It'd be on my list nowadays ...

And that's it for Cartoon Saturday, December 6th, 2025 - I hope you enjoyed it.

Have a good day and a great weekend, and make sure you're ready for the holidays ... they'll be here before you know it, tariffs and all. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo