The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for April, 2025

"How low can you go?" used to be the question asked at limbo contests; now, it's the north star of President Musk and Der Furor's mindless assault on the government and society of the United States ... a time when the limbo bar of decency, honor, respect, and compassion is essentially level with the ground. 

As much as I have tried to identify Ass Clowns from various walks of life to receive these awards, the utter awfulness of the administration for which 77 million of my fellow citizens voted has led me to focus on it as the lowest of low-hanging fruit for selection ... and so it is this week.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the tinfoil and toilet paper crown designating

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for April, 2025

 

is presented to

Secretary of Defense

Pete Hegseth

There's not much point in rehashing the nearly criminal incompetence exhibited by Mr Hegseth in the so-called "Signalgate" fiasco; suffice it to say - as have commentators wiser and more esteemed than I - that had any military member exhibited the towering level disregard of classification, operational security, and simple common sense demonstrated by Mr Hegseth, they would have been fired at the very least, and probably court-martialed and imprisoned.

The incident itself was bad enough, but the ho-hum-no-big-deal-nothing-to-see-here-everybody-makes-mistakes-and-Hillary's-emails-were-worse-anyhow reaction of the PINO and his lickspittle cabinet officers, press spokesdrones, and other apologists have made a mockery of an administration that misses no opportunity to loudl trumpets its worship at the festooned altar of "accountability" and "merit." If Mr Hegseth had the least shreds of dignity and respect for his position, he would resign if the PINO didn't fire him. But, of course, in this administration, unflinching and unquestioned loyalty to Der Furor are far more important than basic competence, gravitas, or qualification for the office to which one is appointed.

Mr Hegseth, not satisfied with his shameful performance in "Signalgate," blundered into yet another security-related incident when it was revealed that he had permitted his wife Jennifer, a producer at Fox "News" with no security clearances or need-to-know, to accompany him to meetings with foreign military officials at which sensitive classified information was discussed. Again, as might be expected, no action on this egregious security breach has been taken by the administration.

When I sat down to write this period's award, I was strongly tempted to present it to "Vice President" JD Vance for his shameful, bullying behavior during his uninvited visit to Greenland, which accomplished nothing but driving our allies farther away and further tarnishing what little remains of our international reputation. I finally decided on Mr Hegseth because his childish and thoughtless action had the potential to compromise a military operation in progress, costing the lives of American service members he sent into harm's way.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for April, 2025, is Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth - a man out of his depth, lacking mature judgement, and utterly unqualified for one of the most critical cabinet positions.

And, by the way, the attire worn by Mr Hegseth in the photo above violates 4 USC 1, Section 8(j), which states that "No part of the flag should ever be used as a costume or athletic uniform." But at least it covers all his offensive tattoos*.

Have a good day. Hope for the best, but expect the worst. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Some of which would probably get him deported to a prison in El Salvador if he weren't white and connected.