Voting Is Now Open for the 2021 Ass Clown of the Year!

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, today is the official start of the selection campaign for this year's successor to Senator Mitch McConnell, who has won this award three years in a row ... yes, it's time to start voting for

The 2021 Ass Clown of the Year

By Friday, December 31st (the announcement of the final award for the year, the On-Crack Ass Clown for December), I will have named 32 regular or special awardees in 2021, all of whom are eligible for the annual award. Of course, if there's someone I missed or someone you like better, you are free to vote for the write-in candidate of your choice. Here are the basic ground rules for the Ass Clown of the Year voting, unchanged from previous years except as noted:

- Chicago Rules apply: you may vote as many times as you want, for as many candidates as you want. You may cast votes on behalf of yourself, your family members, your friends, your family members' friends, your pets, your friends' and family members' pets, or anyone else, living or dead. In the interest of fairness, I ask only that you not cast more than 50 votes (up from 10 last year) at any one time for any one candidate ... just vote more often. 

- You may vote for any of the 32 biweekly and special award winners (the first 31 are listed below, and the last will be announced on December 31st), or for anyone else you wish. 

- You need not be legally authorized to vote in the United States. Laws don't apply to Republicans, why should they apply to you?

- No ID is required and there are no age restrictions. If you are concerned that the Russians (or the Chinese, or the Venezuelans, or the Italians (by satellite), or the Martians or one or the other political party, or the "Deep State") will manipulate the results to undermine the integrity of the award without such identification, consider that the fanatical supporters of Der Furor are already convinced that elections they don't win are rigged and will assume that any IDs presented will be phony, anyhow. And in any case, integrity is a quaintly outdated concept in today's political world in which "facts" require no proof or connection to reality. I worry more about my fellow citizens than I do about any external actors.

- Finally, for the second year in a row, because the number and quality* of potential awardees is so staggeringly high, you have the option to vote for ALL OF THE ABOVE, rather than a single winner.

- Votes will be accepted from now until 11:59 PM on Friday, December 31st. You may vote by leaving a comment on this or any future blog post between now and then; by sending an e-mail to der_blogmeister@yahoo.com; by sending me a PM or leaving a comment on Facebook if we are connected there; by text message if you have my phone number; or verbally from a distance of at least six feet if we should happen to meet and you are unmasked and unvaccinated**. If you choose to cast your votes in person, be advised that your candidate's chances of winning are enhanced if the votes are accompanied by adult beverages, healthy snacks, or cash. Yes, it's bribery, but in today's political environment it's okay unless the other side is doing it.

I will provide periodic updates on the balloting, and will announce the 2021 Ass Clown of the Year in this space on Saturday, January 1st, 2022.

To help you make your choice, here are links to the first 31 Ass Clown awardees for 2021, in case you want to go back and review the citations:

Senators Ted Cruz (R, TX), Josh Hawley (R, MO), and the GOP Sedition Caucus (Special Award)

The Soon-to-Be Former President (January Right-Cheek)

Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene (R, GA-14) (January Left-Cheek)

Bruce Castor (February Right-Cheek)

Senator Ron Johnson (R, WI) (February Left-Cheek)

Tucker Carlson (March Right-Cheek)

Sidney Powell (March Left-Cheek)

Representative Matt Gaetz (R, FL-1) (April Right-Cheek)

Sean Hannity (April Left-Cheek)

The Republican Party (May Right-Cheek)

Representative Andrew Clyde (R, GA-9) (May Left-Cheek)

Senators Joe Manchin (D, WV) and Kyrsten Sinema (D, AZ) (June Right-Cheek)

Representative Lauren Boebert (R, CO-3) (June Left-Cheek)

Dr Sherri Tenpenny (Special Award)

Senator Mitch McConnell and Former Attorney General William Barr (July Right-Cheek)

Representative Paul Gosar (R, AZ-4) (Special Award)

Hobby Lobby (Special Award)

Kimberly Guilfoyle (July Left-Cheek)

Monsignor Jeffrey Burrill (Special Award)

Senator Tommy Tuberville (R, GA) (July On-Crack)

Greg Locke (Special Award)

Senator Rand Paul (R, KY) (August Right-Cheek)

The Anti-Vaxxers (August Left-Cheek)

Texas Governor Gregg Abbott and Florida Governor Ron DeSantis (September Right-Cheek)

John Eastman (September Left-Cheek)

The Republican Party (October Right-Cheek)

Senator Joe Manchin (D, WV) (October Left-Cheek)

The Democratic Party (November Right-Cheek)

The Republican Party (November Left-Cheek)

Representatives Marjorie Taylor Greene (R, GA-14) and Lauren Boebert (R, CO-3) (December Right-Cheek)

Senator Rand Paul (R, KY) (December Left-Cheek)

TBA on December 31st (December On-Crack)

It's up to you, now ... vote early, vote often, and make sure your voice is heard and your chosen ass clown is recognized.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

*I hate to use that word, but I'm not sure which other one applies. I'm open to suggestions.

** And still alive.