Ass Clown Special Award

It's been that kind of year, hasn't it?

Between the bizarre chaos of Der Furor's regime, the ghastly expense of the midterm elections, and the behavior of many of our fellow citizens, 2026 is surely going to be a year for the record books ... as well as a year for Ass Clown Awards. This month has already seen two routine (Right-Cheek and Left-Cheek) and one Special ass clown awards, with an On-Crack award scheduled for a week from today. But such is this insane time that I find it necessary to wedge in yet another

Ass Clown Special Award

and it goes to not one, but two supremely deserving ass clowns - 

Steve Witkoff

(he's the one on the right)

and

Vivek Ramaswami

Mr Witkoff, Der Furor's "Special Representative" for whatever needs special representing, set a new standard for - in the words of historian Steven Beschloss - "sniveling obeisance" when he told murderously psychopathic Russian president Vladimir Putin at a meeting in St Petersburg (Russia, not Florida),  

“You talk so much about my president, President Trump, being a humanitarian. You are a humanitarian also, sir, and I salute that. I commend you, and I thank you again.”

That such a woefully unqualified and sycophantic representative of the United States government would debase himself and his position and undercut the honor and dignity of the nation is beyond despicable.

The second awardee, Vivek Ramaswami, plumbed new depths of cruelty and dishonor this past week when he published a nauseatingly cruel and utterly false video ad that used recordings of the seriously unwell mother of Dr Amy Acton to lie about Dr Acton's history of childhood abuse. Dr Acton's brother responded this way,

"After [our stepfather] was arrested and Amy and I were removed from their custody, our birth mother stayed married to Amy’s rapist until he died. This desperate, disgusting attack reveals exactly who Vivek Ramaswamy is at his core—a pathetic excuse for a man who is willing to hurt anyone as long as it gets him what he wants."

For her part, Dr Acton said,

“I think it was a terrible thing to do this to someone who is not well, as my birth mother isn’t. I know my opponent will stoop to anything to get ahead.”

Mr Ramaswamy not only refused to apologize for the slanderously misleading ad, but instead doubled down, spending another $4 million to keep running it while a handful of Republicans tepidly and performatively objected. And were that not enough, Vice Furor JD Vance told an Ohio rally this past Wednesday,

“I have to admit that I’m a little bit disgusted when I see Republicans across the country who are whining more about that advertisement than they are about what the congressional Democrats and other Democrats want to do to the United States of America.” 

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, I present this out-of-cycle Ass Clown Special Award to two of the worst representatives of American "leadership" and values I've seen in my lifetime - Steve Witkoff and Vivek Ramaswamy. They make me ashamed to be an American.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Great Moments in Editing and Signage

It's time for the last installment of Great Moments in Editing and Signage for the month, so let's get right to it ...

When you need a gift for the person who has everything ...

Perhaps that was not exactly the best place to park the janitor cart ...

Maybe Der Furor was onto something (as opposed to just being on something) when he accused immigrants of eating dogs and cats ...

So, what if the dog lives with a Jewish family? ...

I guess the narrator just shouts the text ...

Useless signs 101 ...

Well, I suppose it would work and save money ...

At my age, I have to worry about buzzards, so I won't be trying to attract their attention ...

Now, that's service ...

You have to wonder what happened to the Unsinkable I ...

And that's it for our last collection of Great Moments for the month of October ... next Friday we'll have the On-Crack Ass Clown presentation.

Have a good day and come back tomorrow for the next edition of our Cartoon Saturday salute to Halloween - this week featuring Mad Scientists. See you then if you dare.

Bilbo

Thursday Trees

It's time once again for Mike's Thursday Trees! Feel free to contact him if you have any complaints.

Are we ready? Let's go!

1 - an amate tree, known for its interesting roots ...

2 - a bristlecone pine ...

 3 - a forest in Cornwall, UK ...

4 - Happy Halloween ...

5 - a hackberry tree ...

6 - it looks to me like they're dancing ...

7 - Menwood Park, Leeds, UK ...

8 - I shamelessly stole this one from my friend Andrea's Facebook page. I hope she'll forgive me ...

9 - a sweet cherry tree ...

10 - This is a wachholderbaum (a juniper tree, in English), but it looks like me trying to do a downward facing dog pose in yoga ...

Oh, and here's a bonus, copied from a post by my friend, fellow blogger, and curmudgeon-in-training John ...

And that's it for this week's Thursday Trees - I hope you enjoyed them. Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for this month's last collection of Great Moments in Editing and Signage ... see you then!

Bilbo

Government for Sale

One of the most depressing things about an election season in the United States is the staggering amount of money being spent by those seeking office and those hoping to purchase favors from those seeking office.

Elon Musk alone has spent at least $276 million - that we know of - trying to prop up unpopular Republicans, in particular in Texas, where he seeks to buy compliant elected officials who will not interfere with his vast SpaceX empire. Der Furor has "suggested" that his Super PAC will spend at least $400 million by election day. Michael R. Bloomberg, the billionaire former mayor of New York, is said to be giving roughly $80 million to help Democrats. 

As of October 19th, the Federal Election Commission estimates that $1.83 billion has been spent on House races, and $1.03 billion has been spent on Senate races. And there's still two weeks to go until election day.

No one really knows the grand total that will end up being spent not only on the election, but on the near-certain flood of lawsuits that will be filed by losing candidates and by a GOP-dominated federal government desperate to somehow prove that Republican losses are the result of vast, imaginary fraud rather than public disgust at their ineptitude and blatant corruption.

This is obscene.

In the wealthiest nation on earth, ordinary people are being bankrupted by medical debt and crippled by the skyrocketing cost of food and fuel. Rural hospitals are closing or eliminating vital services like labor and delivery. Deadly diseases we thought had been eliminated are back and killing us. Infrastructure is crumbling. People are being sickened by products and foods no longer being tested by a government more interested in currying favor with corporations than in protecting our health. Money is being wildly wasted on gilding the Oval Office, building an unnecessary ballroom at the Gilded House, erecting a useless "triumphal arch," and replacing a popular public golf course complex in Washington with a single "championship-level" course real people will almost certainly never be able to use. We are spending vast amounts of money on a needless war against Iran, on testosterone screening and supplements for military personnel, and on tax cuts that benefit the wealthy and big corporations.

A lot of money is being spent on this election by those who want to keep feeding at the trough you and I fill with our taxes. Let them know what you think of them. Vote like your future depends on it, because it does.

Have a good day. Vote the bums out, and make sure the new bums you vote in work for you, not for Vladimir Putin and the Musks and the Bezoses and the Zuckerbergs and the rest of the wealthy elite.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Citizen Soldiers

The United States has a long tradition of "citizen soldiers" - ordinary men and women who step up and do the ugly job of soldiering when the nation is in need. That tradition began with the so-called "minutemen" of the revolutionary era, who stopped plowing their fields, picked up their muskets, and answered their nation's call, and it continues to the present day.

We do not, at least until the modern era, have a tradition of a large standing army ... indeed, the Founders worried that such a force could be used to oppress the citizens, rather than defend them. When we needed a big army, we built it, and once the need was gone, we sent the soldiers home and relied on a smaller force that could be augmented if needed. At the outbreak of the First World War, the U.S. Army (including the National Guard) had a strength of about 200,000 and was the ninth-largest army in the world ... vastly inferior to the armies of England, France, Germany, and Imperial Russia. At the outbreak of the Second World War, it ranked 19th in size, smaller than the army of Portugal and slightly ahead of powerhouse Bulgaria.

Of course, our armed forces grew dramatically with the introduction of conscription for the World Wars and continuing through Vietnam, reaching a strength of about 12 million at the height of World War II and 800,000 at the end of the Vietnam War in 1973. Disgust with Vietnam led to the end of conscription in January, 1973 ... since then, we've been an all-volunteer force that today consists of about 480,000 active duty troops and another 524,000 in the National Guard and Reserve, even as the nation fought new wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, Iran, and other places.

My point with this little, off-the-cuff history lesson is that we are now, as we have been through most of our history, a nation of citizen soldiers. 

Which brings me to the current Secretary of Defense (not War), who has a vision not of an army of citizens reluctantly but bravely doing a dirty job for a nation in peril, but of a supremely lethal force of clean-shaven, chiseled, testosterone-oozing giants unencumbered by useless distractions like law and morality. I am horrified at what he has done to the honorable tradition memorably documented by historian Steven Ambrose in his wonderful books "Citizen Soldiers" and "Band of Brothers." I am especially horrified that there appears to be actual discussion among our national "leaders" that our citizen soldiers might be employed to ensure the desired outcome of our elections - something we might once have thought happened only in the banana-est of banana republics. Indeed, there was consternation earlier this month in Washington, DC, when armed National Guard troops were photographed at an official ballot drop box.

As you head to the polls on November 3rd (if you didn't vote early), think about the type of nation you want to live in, and ask yourselves how comfortable you are with the idea of our citizen soldiers being used to still your voice.

Choose wisely.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Monday Mountains

For those of you who asked, the wedding was great fun, nobody dropped the cake, and I learned that too much dancing on two artificial knees is not for sissies. Buy your stock in Tylenol now.

Time to start the new week with your mountain fix ...

1 - Someone knew how to frame a photo ...

2 - Banff National Park, Alberta, Canada ...

3 - The Bavarian Alps, with the castle of Hohenschwangau in the foreground ...

4 - Chugach Mountains, Alaska ...

5 - Colima volcano, Mexico ...

6 - autumn in the French Alps ...

7 - I could wake up to this vista every day ...

8 - If you look up "rugged" in the dictionary, this might be the illustration ...

9 - Whoever sited this castle knew what he was doing ...

10 - in the Peruvian Andes ...

That's your Monday Mountains fix for this week ... I hope you enjoyed it. 

Have a good day and as good a week as the social and political hysteria will allow. More thoughts coming. 

Bilbo

Musical Sunday

Our salute to Halloween continues on this Musical Sunday with the admonition from Billie Eilish that "all the good girls go to hell" ...

The lyrics:

My Lucifer is lonely

Standing there, killing time

Can't commit to anything but a crime

Peter's on vacation, an open invitation

Animals, evidence

Pearly gates look more like a picket fence

Once you get inside 'em

Got friends but can't invite them

Hills burn in California

My turn to ignore ya

Don't say I didn't warn ya

All the good girls go to hell

'Cause even God herself has enemies

And once the water starts to rise

And heaven's out of sight

She'll want the devil on her team

My Lucifer is lonely

Look at you needing me

You know I'm not your friend without some greenery

Walk in wearing fetters

Peter should know better

Your cover up is caving in

Man is such a fool

Why are we saving him?

Poisoning themselves now

Begging for our help, wow!

Hills burn in California

My turn to ignore ya

Don't say I didn't warn ya

All the good girls go to hell

'Cause even God herself has enemies

And once the water starts to rise

And heaven's out of sight

She'll want the devil on her team

My Lucifer is lonely

There's nothing left to save now

My god is gonna owe me

There's nothing left to save now

I, personally, disagree with Ms Eilish, but we all have our opinions.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

We're just a few weeks out from the midterm elections. Geezo, peezo, can we just speed things up a little?

Because we're on the road today for our niece's wedding, I don't have time to do the usual news summary this week. It's okay, though, because all the news is depressing, anyway.

For the third Cartoon Saturday of the Halloween month, let's take a look at the lighter side of The Invisible Man. 

I have to say that I agree with her ...

There are a lot of dog owners around here who would love to have that formula ...

Good point ...

Uh, oh ...

It sort of defeats the purpose of the invisibility, doesn't it? 

It apparently does not please the court ...

When you're The Mummy, your Halloween costume party options can be a bit limited ...

Busted!

I've got his number ...

Cue the bwa, ha, HAAAA ...

And that's it for our Cartoon Saturday visit to The Invisible Man - I hope it gave you a laugh to help recover from the week.

Have a good day and a great weekend, and be sure to come back tomorrow for another Halloween-themed Musical Sunday, this time featuring Billie Eilish.

More thoughts then.

Bilbo

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2026

Earlier this week, I presented an out-of-cycle Special Award to Secretary of Defense (not War) Pete Hegseth. I noted in that post that I find it increasingly depressing to note the vast number of people in today's America who deserve these awards. In times past, I was able to reach down into the ranks of everyday Americans to find awardees whose behavior reflected the broad range of social, political, religious, economic, or simple everyday buffoonery that was sometimes funny and frequently harmless, but rarely dangerous.

Nowadays, the ass clownery has gone from funny or harmless to definitely dangerous.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, with a sense of true, utter horror, I designate as 

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2026

Der Furor

with special recognition in a supporting role to

The GOP Congressional Delegation

While I appreciate the legitimate criticism that he represents the lowest of low-hanging fruit, having previously won this award 22 times (including two Ass Clown of the Year designations and a Lifetime Achievement Award I have since withdrawn), his behavior in the last week has so far overshot the bounds of dignity, propriety, and respect for the office of the Presidency that I can think of no one more deserving of condemnation by all good Americans and people of good will everywhere.

We have long known that Der Furor has an embarrassingly fawning relationship with Russian president Vladimir Putin, but that relationship this week broke all restraints of propriety, responsibility, and respect for our international standing when - after more than a decade of pretending that he would honor American support for Ukraine and our European allies, he openly embraced Putin and accused Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy of responsibility for his country's invasion and devastation by Russia. He also announced an agreement unilaterally to drop Congressionally-mandated sanctions and purchase hundreds of thousands of tons of Russian oil ... a move that will provide a funding windfall for Putin's aggressive war while providing virtually no impact on supplies of diesel fuel for American consumers.

The full history of Der Furor's entanglement with Putin and Russia was clearly and comprehensively laid out in Professor Heather Cox Richardson's "Letter from an American" on October 10th. I encourage you to read it and consider the treasonous behavior of a man twice elected to the presidency by Americans who believed he shared their values and would do right by them. He has shamelessly, brazenly sold out his followers, the nation, and our allies. I can express my thoughts no better than Professor Richardson did in the final paragraph of her essay: 

"... at this point, how much more evidence is necessary to assess that [Der Furor] has undermined U.S. national security and is working for Russia? And how much longer will Republicans in Congress continue to protect him as he does it?"

And speaking of Republicans in Congress ...

The abject failure of Congressional Republicans to hold Der Furor to account for his brazen self-enrichment, flouting of the law, and seizure of powers specifically granted to Congress by the Constitution, has created and fed a monster they can no longer control, even supposing they wanted to. The occasional pusillanimous, tentative objection to Der Furor's worst excesses is almost always provided by individual Republicans when it is safe to do so and will make no difference in the outcome. Indeed, the House of Representatives, under the "leadership" of Speaker Mike Johnson, has a well-documented history of simply running away into recess rather than risking the chance that Der Furor and his party could face the consequences of their actions. Congressional Republicans, both in the Senate and the House, are of use only for casting fact-free, innuendo-laden sound bites at witnesses unable to protect themselves.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Left-Cheek Ass Clown Award for October, 2026, is presented to Der Furor, whose stain on the honor and dignity of the presidency and the nation will take generations to remove, and the Congressional GOP Delegation, which continues spinelessly to protect and enable the steady destruction of the nation it has sworn to serve.

Have a good day. The 2026 midterm elections are only 18 days away - your chance to bring sanity, decency, and accountability back to Congress and let Der Furor know that his days of unchecked corruption and abysmal leadership are numbered. Make sure you are registered and that you make your voice heard!

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo