Monday, September 30, 2013

Countdown to Irresponsibility


Tomorrow morning at 12:01AM, barring a sudden and unexpected rush of sanity and adult behavior, Congress (mainly the far-right wing of the Republican Party) will partially shut down the United States government. Many thousands of government workers (including my son and daughter) and those whose livelihoods depend on their work will be furloughed, without hope of regaining pay lost during the duration of the manufactured crisis. The local and national economies will be damaged. Brainless wingnuts wearing tricorn hats will wave their Gadsden flags and trumpet their fidelity to concepts they do not understand, and the rest of the world will shake its head at our propensity for self-destructive behavior.

If you read the comments posted to online articles at CNN.com and Washingtonpost.com about the government shutdown, you will find some of the most amazing trolls you will ever hope to see, continuing the heaping of abuse on government workers that was begun by the GOP's extreme right wing. The people who keep you safe, ensure your food is wholesome, protect you from disease, allow you to fly safely, and try to prevent you from being exploited by your employers are derided as lazy, stupid, shiftless bums and jackbooted thugsTM who "couldn't run a lemonade stand" (a quote from one amazing comment I read this morning) who all deserve to be thrown to the curb so that America will suddenly return to its imagined past paradise of untrammeled, unlimited "freedom."

This afternoon, Agnes's cousin Bernadette and her husband Richard will arrive from Germany for a visit. One of the things they'll ask me will almost certainly be the question I heard so often from people while we were in Germany earlier this month: What's wrong with you people?

Sadly, the problem is that the irresponsible and narcissistic people who are causing this needless crisis are impervious to logic and reason. A great quote from the film The Dark Knight applies ... Alfred, Bruce Wayne's loyal butler, is telling his boss a story from his experience searching for a bandit leader in the Burmese jungle. In the end, the search was unsuccessful because, as Alfred explained ...

... some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

And some men just believe so totally in their own righteousness that they're willing to take the whole country down with them.

I could go on, but I'm too angry and too ashamed of the ludicrous clown show that has replaced our government and the bizarre mouth-frothing that has replaced civil discourse. I wonder what sort of lesson we're teaching our children, and what kind of country we're leaving them.

Have a good day. Tomorrow I'll try to be more positive, and to tell you the story of this past weekend's visit to Chincoteague and Assateague Islands with the local grandchildren. Perhaps I'll be more centered, and my aches and pains a bit eased, by then.

Bilbo

Friday, September 27, 2013

Cartoon Sat ... uh ... Friday


As I warned you yesterday, Agnes and I will be away for the weekend, and so I decided to move Cartoon Saturday up by a day so that you won't miss your weekly cartoon fix. Heaven knows we all need it ...

A section of a bridge in Green Bay, Wisconsin, sank two feet into the earth below, causing the roadway to dip and the bridge to be closed, snarling traffic; GOP Windbag-in-Chief Ted Cruz wasted more than 21 hours of Congress's and the nation's time in a useless speech highlighted by his reading of Dr Seuss's classic children's story Green Eggs and Ham; UK aviation authorities have accused both pilots of a Virgin Atlantic Airbus of sleeping during a transatlantic flight; murderous lunatics of the al-Qaeda affiliated group al-Shabaab slaughtered more than 65 people and injured nearly 200 more in an attack on a shopping mall in Nairobi, Kenya; and a report by the National Security Agency's inspector general documents about a dozen incidents in which NSA employees used their high-tech spy equipment to snoop on their lovers.

Boy, do we need the cartoons this week! ...

There are a lot of good cartoons out there about cavemen, and here are a few of them as our theme collection for the week ...

Even cave artists had to deal with critics* ...


I've been on hold for hundreds of thousands of years, too ... or at least it's seemed like it ...


I've been in clubs where this is not as funny as you might think ...


Today, we have Facebook. Back then, they had ... uh ... Facewall ...


I think this one is a classic ...


Moving away from the topic of cavemen, what happens when you need more cowbell, but don't have it? ...


Worried about the various 3-letter intelligence agencies secretly spying on you? Would this be better? ...


There are Holocaust deniers, climate change deniers, birthers, The-CIA-Actually-Carried-Out-9/11 Nuts, and conspiracy theorists of all sorts. How about this one? ...


GOP science ...


And finally for this week, it's such an obvious joke, but I've never seen it before ...


And there you have it ... September's last Cartoon Saturday, a whole day early. No need to thank me - I know you needed it.

Have a good day and a great weekend. The next post will either be on Sunday afternoon or Monday morning, depending on when we get back. I'll look forward to seeing you then.

Bilbo

* There's a great scene about this early in the classic Mel Brooks film, History of the World, Part 1.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

Non-Essential Personnel


If Congress can't get past its endless buffoonery and cheap political posturing, the government may run out of money and have to partially shut down on Tuesday. This means that a large number of people (including Yours Truly) may be out of work. If the shutdown occurs, only "essential personnel" will be permitted to go to work and get paid ... the rest of us, the "non-essential personnel," will be out of luck. As you might suspect, the uncertainty surrounding who is and isn't "essential," what Congress may or may not do, and the general low regard in which government employees (and contractors) is held nowadays, have contributed to no small degree of angst.

If you ask me, they're looking in the wrong place for non-essential personnel. I think we all know who they are ...


Have a good day. Tomorrow will be Cartoon Saturday for this week, as Agnes and I will be going to Chincoteague Island for the weekend with our local grandchildren, and I'll have other things on my mind than cartoons. Be here for the laughs I know you'll need.

Bilbo

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Vacation Report, Part 4: Images of Singen


Here are a few of the many pictures I shot in the city of Singen, the last stop on our vacation in Germany. Singen is a relatively small, grimy industrial city, the downtown part of which is easily walkable, but not especially scenic. It does, however, have a lot of nice photo opportunities around the outskirts and, especially, in the Stadtgarten (city garden). I've put up a lot of other pictures of Singen in earlier posts ... these are, I think, all new ...

Just in case you have any doubt of where you are as you drive into town via the Hauptstrasse (Main Street) ...


The major scenic attraction of Singen is the huge, ruined fortress of Hohentwiel, which sits atop a huge volcanic plug and can be seen from anywhere in the city. The city is only a few kilometers from the Swiss border and the beautiful town of Stein am Rhein ...


Germans love to walk (unlike Americans, who will sit idling in their cars for 20 minutes to get a parking place as close as possible to their destination). All over town are signs like this, which indicate the distances and the biking and walking times to various destinations ...


Pretty much every city in Germany has a war memorial, and Singen is no exception. Most of the memorials are dedicated to those killed in World Wars I and II, but this one is for Singeners killed in the Franco-Prussian War of 1870 ...


By the way, that spiked helmet the soldier is wearing is called a Pickelhaube ("spiked helmet," duh). I want one. You can buy one here and send it to me for my birthday. Or Christmas. I'll wait.

While I was strolling around the edges of the Stadtgarten, I found this interesting sign attached to a woodpile shaped like a little house ... yes, it says "insect hotel" ...


Here are two pictures of nice scenes within the Stadtgarten. This gate opens from a busy street into the quiet calm of the garden ...


And this one is a view of the Aach River as it flows through the greenery ...


I think I've put up this whimsical picture before, but I love the scene ... it's a tree stump located in the Stadtgarten, cleverly and imaginatively carved in the image of a beaver chowing down ...


Finally, we spent two weeks living in room 206 of the Holiday Inn Express in Singen, which is convenient enough to all the places we needed to go, but is not a shining example of the luxury European hotel experience. This was the view from our window in the front of the building ... on the left is the Rathaus (city hall), and just barely visible on the right is the Stadthalle (multi-purpose event hall). Both of those buildings (and the Holiday Inn Express) are blocky, ugly, and functional; the view directly ahead shows some typically old-German architecture that I find a lot more beautiful ... 


And that finishes up my photographic summary of our trip to Germany. If you've never been there, it's beautiful and worth visiting. And if you need an interpreter, my rates are very reasonable.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

More Great Moments in Editing ...


It's a busy morning, so how about just a quick revisit to the Department of Great Moments in Editing, with a tip of the hat to my friend Bob, who recently sent many of these to me ...

Yes, I'd say he has a problem ...


This one's for you, Heidi ... 


Considering that it's spread to the water supply on Capitol Hill, I guess this is good news ...


See it now! No, wait ...


Yes. Yes, it does ...


I think I'm going to swear off lemonade for a while ...


I'd have thought the leg would have been the least of his problems ...


If only he could take another 535 or so ass clowns with him ...


I've always wondered why so many Republicans are so completely and totally hostile to President Obama ... this is as good an explanation as any ...


Finally, a true classic of the editorial double entendre ...


And there you have it. Now go forth and have a good day. There will, of course, be more thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Monday, September 23, 2013

The Ass Clown of the Month for September


Yes, Dear Readers, I know that I promised a few more vacation pictures today, but I think that after yesterday's photographic extravaganza, you could probably use a break. And I don't want to let the opportunity to designate this month's Ass Clown of the Month go by without naming a suitable dishonoree.


As always, the field of possible candidates is huge and the selection is correspondingly difficult. The amazing ass-clownery oozing out of the halls of a useless, do-nothing Congress alone provides 535 worthy* candidates, and the people who endorsed a "secret" level security clearance to the man who murdered 12 people at the Washington Navy Yard also made a very strong showing. But for sheer murderous ass-clownery in the self-appointed service of God, a group award for this month's Ass Clown of the Month goes to


Al-Shabaab, or "The Youth," an al-Qaeda-linked militant Islamic group fighting for the creation of a fundamentalist Islamic state in Somalia, attacked a shopping mall in Nairobi, Kenya, murdering at least 68 people and injuring more than 175 after allegedly allowing Muslims to leave for safety. 

For its shining example of murderous religious bigotry and intolerance, al-Shabaab as a group and all its members as individuals are jointly designated our September Ass Clown of the Month.

Have a good day. If your religious beliefs include a belief in your right and duty to murder people of other faiths, you might want to rethink the sort of God you worship, because you're a worthless idiot on the way to finding out all about hell, rather than paradise.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* And I use the term loosely.

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Vacation Report, Part 3: The Big Wedding


As you know, one of the original reasons for our trip to Germany was to attend the wedding of Agnes's nephew Frederik (son of her cousin Anna) to his fiancee Silke. While we always enjoy visiting Anna and Volker, the opportunity to attend Frederik's wedding was an added pleasure ... although, as is usual with our extended family, it was not without its adventures.

We left Volker and Anna's home in Reutlingen on Friday morning, August 30th, and drove to Frankfurt to meet up with their daughter Lea and her friend Stefan and with Frederik and Silke to help with the transport of the wedding supplies to the final destination. These supplies consisted of many cases of wine and spirits, large numbers of hand-made decorations (one of Silke's specialties), and - of course - all the required clothes, shoes, dresses, and other things needed to pull off the Wedding of the Year. This picture shows Volker tying down the fully-loaded trailer we pulled behind his fully-loaded car (but doesn't show the equally-fully-loaded rental van that Stefan and Lea also had) ...


We drove from Frankfurt to the location of the wedding at the Hofgut Mappen in Schlangenbad, not far from the city of Wiesbaden where Agnes and I lived from 1987-1990 (and I earlier lived between 1978 and 1980). The Hofgut Mappen is actually a working stable that trains racehorses, and sits on a low mountain well out in the forested countryside. The stables are set apart from the section of the facility which has been renovated and is used as a luxury locale for weddings and other special events. This was the main gate ...


from which the narrow road wound up through the forest ...


and ended at the gate to the courtyard (we actually parked in a small lot off to the right of this picture) ...


Once inside the gates, the main courtyard area opened out ...


The building in the middle of the picture was the luxurious guest house where the bridal party and the parents stayed. We had a nice party later that afternoon and evening on the front veranda ...


Access to the building was strictly controlled - the sign says "All men (especially Freddy) please knock!" ...


After we'd unloaded and stowed all the wedding supplies, and before the party, Lea and Stefan, Agnes and I, and another young lady drove in their rented van back to Schlangenbad to check into our rooms at the humble, understated Parkhotel ...


After checking in and cleaning up a bit, we all piled back into the van and drove back to the Hofgut, where we had a nice party with Frederik, Silke, and the rest of the bridal party, parents, and friends. In the course of the evening we were able to see another European landmark, the Leaning Tower of Pizza ...


The next morning we all rendezvoused back at the Hofgut early and began the work of setting things up for the wedding. We were a bit worried because the wedding was scheduled to be held outdoors in the courtyard, but at 8:00 AM the weather forecast was calling for an 80% chance of rain during the day. This being the case, the men scrambled to set up Plan B, which involved carrying a lot of (heavy) chairs upstairs to the in-case-of-rain room*, where Silke's father carefully arranged them ...


After the Plan B arrangements were completed, we got to work setting up the hopeful Plan A under threatening skies. Here's how it all looked when it was finally set up. In the first picture, the signpost in the foreground points to some of the many places Frederik and Silke have traveled together, ending up with the sign at the very top of the pole pointing to the tent with the words "Ja Wort" (which could be loosely translated as "The 'I Do' Spot") ...


This picture looks out from the celebrant's chair toward the guest seating. Silke made the dozens of paper flowers we hung from the trees (and the fancy sign in the previous picture) ...


By 10:00 AM, the weather forecast had improved to the point of a 50% chance of rain after 5:00 PM ... which was promising, because the ceremony was scheduled for 2:30. We all crossed our fingers and finished getting ready for the Big Event. Agnes and I cleaned up ...


As did Volker and Anna** ...


And Frederik and Silke ...


Instrumental music was provided by a string trio which did a beautiful job (but did not always impress the many children in attendance) ...


Vocals were provided by Volker and Anna's daughter Lea, who is a trained opera singer (a mezzosoprano) with a beautiful, soaring voice ...


Silke's sister Kirstin also played the guitar and sang Elton John's "Your Song," as well as a duet with Lea - Ben E. King's "Stand By Me" ...


And before long - without any rain! - Frederik and Silke walked happily back down the aisle in a shower of flower petals and soap bubbles ...


But wait - there's more!

Volker wanted to take a group picture of the entire crowd, which turned out to be a lot like the proverbial herding of cats ... he finally settled for about 80% of the crowd just as it started to drizzle.


Someone also decided that it would be a nice idea to make a calendar for Frederik and Silke with each month illustrated by a photo of the guests who had birthdays in that month. The November group, which included both Yours Truly and Vera, Silke's Maid of Honor (the smiling lady in the front row) was fairly small ...


Oh ... do you remember the earlier mention of the updated weather report which predicted a 50% chance of rain after 5:00 PM? The rain actually started to pour down at 5:02! Fortunately it only lasted for about an hour.

The day went well into the following morning with a gourmet dinner, music and dancing in the beautifully decorated party room ... to which the grumbling caterers had carried back and re-covered all the chairs we'd stripped of their covers and schlepped up to the Plan B room earlier that morning ...


Much later, a shuttle bus was available to take all of the exhausted, happy revelers back to the hotel ... which was a good thing, as I wouldn't have wanted to drive the narrow, twisting road back down the mountain at 2:00 AM, wrapped as I was in a happy fog of wine, dance, and goodwill.

The next morning we all assembled at the Parkhotel for a buffet breakfast before going back out to the Hofgut to clean up, re-pack all the decorations and supplies, re-load the van and the trailer, and return to Reutlingen via Frankfurt ... a long, but happy day as we said goodbye to Frederik and Silke as they headed off to Namibia for their honeymoon.

And that, Dear Readers, was the story of the Big Wedding. I actually took hundreds of pictures, of which I've only inflicted about 20 or so on you. Before I forget, though, I suppose I actually should put up a picture proving that there actually were horses at the Hofgut. Volker and I tried to get close enough for better pictures, but the horses kept moving away as we approached, and the goat kept eyeing us suspiciously ...


Okay, that's just about it for the Big Wedding. I will just close by saying that I am proud and happy to be a part of the extended family that includes wonderful people like Volker and Anna, Freddy and Silke, and Lea and (come December) Stefan. I am, for this and many other reasons, the most lucky of men.

Have a good day. More thoughts, including a few more pictures, tomorrow.

Bilbo

* The caterers were upset that we were taking chairs from the room they were trying to set up for the reception and dinner. Too bad.

** Two of the greatest people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing.