Great Moments in Editing and Signage

Once more into the editorial breach, Dear Friends ...

I suspect the small bald man was a libertarian ...

For when you're not ... feline ... like making a big dinner ...

Well, I guess it depends on the circus ...

Earthquakes can have many causes, I suppose ...

They're probably easy to fight ...

Sounds like Congress ...

Nothing I could say to this would turn out well, so I'll just say nothing ...

It's always good to have specific qualifications ...

Well, that's the easiest translation anyone probably ever did ...

I think this one is part of the GOP plan to cut the budgets of various agencies ... they don't need large staffs if customers can't reach them ...

And that's it for our first collection of editorial gems for May. More in two weeks. For now, though, plan to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday ... you know you need a laugh after this bizarre week.

More thoughts then.

Bilbo

The Most Literate Nations

I recently ran across a reference to a 2016 study - The World's Most Literate Nations (WMLN) - conducted by Central Connecticut State University which ranks literacy rates and literate behavior in more than 60 countries around the world. Here's the chart which summarizes the results:

The first thing to note is that the United States is ranked seventh overall, behind five nordic nations and Switzerland. Seventh. First place goes to Finland.

Let that sink in for a minute.

The rankings were calculated using various literacy test results and five categories that constituted "literate behavior characteristics" - Libraries, Newspapers, Education System-Inputs, Education System-Outputs and Computer Availability. The size of each nation's population was also considered in order to establish per capita data. Here's my thinking on how the US ended up in seventh place ...

1. Libraries. Underfunded, underused, and underappreciated, libraries are among the first public services to be cut when money is short. The WMLN report ranks the United States as tied with the United Kingdom for twenty-ninth in this measure. Russia ranks 17th.

2. Newspapers. Circulation is dropping in favor of broadcast media and online outlets that can generate lots of reporting that's a mile wide and an inch deep and can drone in the background without providing context or requiring the need to read and think. The WMLN report ranks the United States twelfth in this measure ... right below Bulgaria.

3. Education System - Inputs. Our teachers are underpaid and underappreciated, and our schools are woefully underfunded and buffeted by the demands of political and religious special interests. And the Department of Education is headed by an individual who is utterly unqualified for the position. The WMLN report ranks the United States ninth in this measure ... Mexico ranks third.

4. Education System - Outputs. This measure ranks nations according to how their students perform on standardized tests of reading ability. We're tied with Germany for 12th place, and elected an unqualified, unprincipled, and churlish boor to be president. 'Nuff said.

5. Computer Availability. The WMLN study ranks nations on the percentage of homes that have a desktop or laptop computer (smart phones, tablets, and TV sets are not considered). The US ranks 23rd, behind the Slovak Republic ... perhaps because computers seem to be most often used for social media and gaming.

Seventh place overall. Why am I not surprised?

Have a good day. Read more, and think about what you read.

Come back tomorrow for another collection of Great Moments in Editing and Signage. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

The Other Freedoms

From the amount of hysterical reaction on the topic, you could be forgiven for thinking that there is only one important part of the Bill of Rights: the Second Amendment. In my opinion, though, the far more important amendment is the First, which reads in its entirety ...

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

In other posts, I'll talk about the First Amendment's guarantees of the freedoms of religion, assembly, and petition. Today, I want to talk about perhaps the most important parts of the First Amendment: the guarantees of freedom of speech and the press.

The fact that we can debate the actual meaning of the Second Amendment - or anything else - is the result of the First Amendment ... the Constitutional guarantee that Congress shall make no law* "... abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press ..."

I bring this up at this point in time because our freedoms of speech and the press are under attack, and not just from the government. It's no secret that our notoriously thin-skinned president has advocated loosening up libel laws so that he can avenge himself on those he believes have treated him unfairly. But while we expect such behavior from a man like Donald Trump, whose ignorance of the Constitution has been on display all along, we see it also from our fellow Americans ... who should know better.

Consider that many of our elected officials - the Senators and Representatives we elected to be our voice in Washington - are no longer willing to hold public meetings with their constituents, because they are shouted down by angry crowds unwilling to listen to what they have to say. Instead, they send staff members to meet with the people they were chosen to represent.

Consider also that conservative flamethrower Ann Coulter backed out of an invitation to address a gathering at UCLA Berkley because of noisy and potentially violent objections by some students ... a situation described as "liberal fascism" by Faux News and as "a sad day for free speech" by Ms Coulter.

It's not often that I agree with Ann Coulter**, but I agree with her on this.

We may disagree with other speakers, but if we cannot speak freely, we cannot evaluate ideas and make informed decisions. We're sure we're right, and they're sure they're right ... if we cannot listen to each other, if we cannot compare their ideas to our own and weigh their value, we will never advance beyond the bitter quasi-intellectual stalemate we enjoy today. We need to understand each other's positions on issues so that we can find points of agreement - difficult though that may be - and work toward the shared goal of making the country a better place for everyone.

Conservatives and libertarians insist that the marketplace will ultimately resolve every problem, and if you believe that you should also believe that it will regulate the marketplace of ideas as well as the marketplace of economics. If we don't expose ourselves to other points of view, we cannot evaluate opposing points of view and ... perhaps ... change their minds.

Have a good day. Let the other guy talk.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* Not that Congress has done much in the way of making laws lately, anyhow.

** Actually, I think she's an idiot who's swallowed too much of her own Kool Aid, but she's got every right to try to convince me otherwise. And she's doing a very poor job of it.

What Climate Change Reveals

The fact that some stubborn people don't acknowledge the existence of climate change doesn't make the effects of that change any less real. And those changes are not just reflected in melting ice caps, rising sea levels, and extreme weather patterns.

A few days ago I read this interesting article on the BBC website: There Are Diseases Hidden in Ice, and They're Waking Up. Yes, Dear Readers, as the climate warms, the warmer air is melting soils that have been frozen for thousands of years, protecting ancient bacteria and viruses that have lived on in the cold and dark. As the soils melt, they are releasing dormant viruses and bacteria to which modern humans may have no natural defenses ... and that's the serious question the article asks:

"What would happen if we were suddenly exposed to deadly bacteria and viruses that have been absent for thousands of years, or that we have never met before?"

What, indeed?

But the effects of changes in the climate aren't limited to the air and the ground and ice caps and the oceans. How about the effects of political climate change?

As our political climate has heated up, it has given new life and acceptability to all sorts of ancient viruses - racist attitudes, economic inequality, religious bigotry, rejection of facts that do not comport with our beliefs, and the spread of manufactured "facts" to justify illogical positions, just to name a few.

Unfortunately, the physical climate will be easier to repair than the political one, if only because it will become increasingly harder to deny its effects ... although many will continue to do so.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Pre-Existing Conditions

One of the most contentious elements of the ongoing fecal maelstrom over health care is the responsibility (or not) of insurance companies to cover the treatment of pre-existing conditions. How that term is defined, and what sorts of conditions are considered "pre-existing," are at the heart of the debate.

Here is a good basic definition of pre-existing condition, taken from Investopedia: "Any personal illness or health condition that was known and existed prior to the writing and signing of an insurance contract."

Insurance companies write, price, and issue policies depending on their assessment of the relative risk to their bottom line - that is, the likelihood that they will have to pay out benefits to policyholders. It's obvious that, from a purely business perspective, an insurance company doesn't want to issue a policy to an individual if they already know that individual represents a bad risk - will cost the company far more in benefits than the individual has paid in premiums. The assessment of risk is why auto insurance companies charge more to insure a teenage male driver than a middle-aged female, or cancel the policies of persons whose record shows multiple accidents for which they are at fault. It's why property insurers charge more to protect homes built on top of earthquake fault lines or in areas prone to wildfires.

Health insurance is a bit different, though. Obviously, it's cheaper and a much better risk to insure a person who is young and fit and less likely to need medical care than to insure an older person who, in the natural scheme of things, is probably more prone to conditions which will require increasingly expensive treatment. The paradox is that young, fit people who think they'll live forever don't want to waste* money on insurance ... but later on, when they're older and really need it, they'll have accumulated a raft of pre-existing conditions that may price the necessary coverage out of their reach.

What are some of the pre-existing conditions that are sometimes cited by insurance companies as justification for higher rates, or for the denial of coverage altogether? Here are some of the commonly-cited conditions which have resulted in automatic denial of coverage**:

AIDS/HIV;
Alcohol or drug abuse with recent treatment;
Alzheimer’s/dementia;
Anorexia;
Arthritis;
Bulimia;
Cancer;
Cerebral palsy;
Congestive heart failure;
Coronary artery/heart disease, bypass surgery;
Crohn’s disease;
Diabetes;
Epilepsy;
Hemophilia;
Hepatitis;
Kidney disease, renal failure;
Lupus;
Mental disorders (including Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Schizophrenia);
Multiple sclerosis;
Muscular dystrophy;
Obesity;
Organ transplant;
Paraplegia;
Paralysis;
Parkinson’s disease;
Pending surgery or hospitalization;
Pneumocystic pneumonia;
Pregnancy or expectant parent (includes men);
Sleep apnea;
Stroke; and,
Transsexualism.

That's quite a list, and I'm pretty sure that it covers a significant portion of the population. I'm just glad that my arthritis and sleep apnea were diagnosed well after I'd already obtained my insurance, or I'd be up the creek without a medical paddle.

There are a few other conditions I'm surprised aren't on the list. They include:

Life (after all, if you weren't alive, you wouldn't need to worry about health care);

Poverty (which will, in many cases, prevent you from obtaining the routine care that will prevent the development of other pre-existing conditions); and,

Stupidity (which prevents you from recognizing that you are being screwed by the health care insurance system, and allows you to vote for elected officials who do not have your best interests at heart).

Oh, and it should be noted that while mental disorders are considered a pre-existing condition which will preclude the purchase of health insurance, they are not considered serious enough to preclude the purchase of firearms*** (see Stupidity, above).

If you suffer from anything on this list, or any other list maintained by any of the 50 states or any insurance provider, good luck. You're on your own.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* From their perspective.

** From a December 2016 report on the topic from the Kaiser Family Foundation. You can see the list in context and read the full report here.

*** Not completely accurate, but close.

Poetry Sunday

Yesterday was World Naked Gardening Day ... and before you ask, yes, I worked in the garden and no, I was not naked. I didn't need the spectacle of our neighbors descending on our place in a howling mob, waving pitchforks and torches. Nevertheless, it's good to celebrate the useful pastime of gardening, which makes our homes beautiful and provides us with delicious herbs, fruits, and vegetables we grew ourselves. Here's a poem that applies ...

Family Garden

by Hank Hudepohl

Tell me again about your garden
           Tell me how you planted, in the small
                      flat of mountain land, corn seed

and bean seed, how your finger poked the soil
           then you dropped in three dark bean seeds
                      for every yellow seed of corn.

Trees and mountains collared your land,
           but the fenced garden opened freely
                      to sun and warm summer rains.

Your potato rows bulged in July. You ached
           from digging them up, your hands down in dirt,
                      the cool lump of a tuber, brown-spotted,

just recovered, a greeting, like shaking hands.
           Baskets full of bumpy brown potatoes filled
                      your basement until fall, until you gave

away what you could, throwing out the rest.
           You gave away honey from the white hive too,
                      that box of bees beside the garden,

honey stored in Mason jars, a clearest honey
           nectar from lin tree blossoms and wild flowers.
                      The bright taste of honey on the tongue

spoke of the place, if a place can be known
           by the activity of bees and a flavor in the mouth,
                      if a person can be known by small acts

such as these, such as the way you rocked
           summer evenings from a chair on the porch
                      tending your inner garden, eyes closed.

Here's my garden ...

How's yours?

Have a good day and enjoy the fresh air and sunshine while you garden. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

Welcome to the first Cartoon Saturday of May, 2017. You know you need it ...

The Internal Revenue Service has announced that it will contract collection of some tax debts to commercial debt collection agencies; House Republicans rammed through their "replacement" for the Affordable Care Act - without holding any hearings on it, without getting the Congressional Budget Office's report on its economic effects, and in spite of the objections of every major stakeholder; Buckingham Palace announced that Prince Philip, the husband of Queen Elizabeth II, will retire from public life in August; Donald Trump signed a new executive order on Thursday which eases restrictions on political activity by religious organizations; and in Canada, public health authorities have launched a nationwide recall of Bombay Sapphire gin after some bottles were discovered to contain almost twice the advertised amount of alcohol (77%, rather than 40%).

Since today is World Naked Gardening Day, I thought it would be appropriate to share a few cartoons based on plants and gardening. You'll have to use your imagination on the naked part ...

This is how it often seems that the local animals view my garden ...

I think I'll pass on the exotic plants ...

Me, too ...

Fake news, fake plants ...

What pirates do in their spare time ...

I wonder if this could be the ultimate result of genetic manipulation of plants ...

A really good gardener can grow puns, too ...

How we talk to our plants in 2017 ...

What happens when you don't define your terms properly ...

Everybody's gotta start someplace ...

And that's your first Cartoon Saturday for the Month of May, 2017. I hope you're using plenty of sunblock if you're celebrating Naked Gardening Day. And that you're on good terms with your neighbors.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Poetry Sunday returns.

Bilbo

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for May, 2017

There are days when I almost regret having established my tradition of the biweekly Ass Clown Awards ... not because I don't enjoy doing them, but because the mental anguish of having to select one appropriate representative out of the surging crowd of eligible candidates causes miserable headaches.

I had the list of finalists down to five for this week, and the choice was difficult to make, but you're counting on me to do it ... and so, Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, I give you

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for May, 2017

Hillary Rodham Clinton

Disclaimer: I voted for Hillary Clinton for president in the last election, if with gritted teeth and crossed fingers.

For the last two years, during the presidential campaign and its aftermath, I took a very large amount of grief from my more conservative friends for not bestowing this award upon Secretary Clinton. I was sternly lectured on her many faults, and the various reasons why our government would crumble into ruin if such a morally flawed individual as she - hell-bent on ruining the nation - were elected. 

Well, the people spoke and - although they gave her three million more popular* votes than Mr Trump - the Constitution mandated that she lose in the Electoral College to a different morally flawed individual hell-bent on ruining the nation. 

Secretary Clinton is presented this award for her recent interview with CNN reporter Christiane Amanpour in which, although she said that "I accept full personal responsibility" for losing the election, she went on to provide a laundry list of the real reasons she lost (Russian meddling, misogyny, Wiki-Leaks, FBI Director Comey's actions** while investigating the horror of her private e-mail server, etc, etc) ... none of which mentioned her own actions and personal shortcomings as a candidate (poor likeability, a deficit of trust, etc). 

We know from observation that Donald Trump will dodge responsibility and blame everyone but himself when things go wrong. One would have hoped that Secretary Clinton, seeing this, would have stepped up and delivered an honest critique of the campaign that acknowledged her role in the defeat ... but one would be disappointed. I, for one, had hoped for better.

We live in a political era in which the acceptance of personal responsibility is viewed as a sign of weakness. Everything that goes wrong is always someone else's fault. Unfortunately, we swallow this whole and give those we like a free pass while heaping blame on everyone else.

We get what we deserve.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, Hillary Rodham Clinton is our Right-Cheek Ass Clown for the Month of May, 2017. 

And it's no one's fault but her own.

Have a good day. Come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* I use the term "popular" to mean "of the people," not to imply that Secretary Clinton was especially popular in her own right. She was not an especially likeable or trust-inspiring candidate, and gave her opponents plenty of opportunities to magnify her shortcomings.

** Which won him the Right-Cheek Ass Clown Award for November of 2016.

Laidlaw's Rule

I'm a little late coming to this topic, but I'm going to go with it, anyhow.

"Laidlaw's Rule" is named for an author named Marc Laidlaw who recently hypothesized that even the most boring, difficult-to-get-into book could be improved by adding the following text to the book as the second sentence: And then the murders began.

This is actually pretty interesting, and it seems to work for books of all types ...

The Bible: "In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And then the murders began."

The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien: "In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. And then the murders began."

The Godfather, by Mario Puzo: "Amerigo Bonasera sat in New York Criminal Court Number Three and waited for justice. And then the murders began."*

The Cat in the Hat, by Dr Seuss: "The sun did not shine. And then the murders began."

The Killer Angels, by Michael Shaara: "He rode into the dark of the woods and dismounted. And then the murders began."

A Game of Thrones, by George R.R. Martin: "'We should start back,' Gared urged as the woods began to grow dark around them. And then the murders began."

The Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood: "We slept in what had once been the gymnasium. And then the murders began."

So, what do you think, Dear Readers? What book do you think would start with a bigger bang if Laidlaw's Rule is applied? Leave a comment.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when we announce the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for May.

Bilbo

* Well, actually, they did ... and quite a few of them.

When Caesar Needs Help Getting You to Render

I think most of us are familiar with the Biblical story told in chapter 22 of Matthew, verses 20-22* ...

"20 And he saith unto them, Whose is this image and superscription?

21 They say unto him, Caesar's. Then saith he unto them, Render therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar's; and unto God the things that are God's.

22 When they had heard these words, they marvelled, and left him, and went their way.

This story is the basis of the separation, in Christian tradition, of temporal and spiritual authority. "Rendering unto Caesar" is sometimes used as shorthand for paying taxes to the various temporal authorities who are legally entitled to dip their sticky fingers into our pockets.

But what happens when Caesar isn't able to enforce all the rendering he's expecting? There's an empire to run, after all ... somebody has to make sure we're doing all the rendering we're supposed to do.

And that's why the Internal Revenue Service, suffering from years of budget cuts and benign neglect, mostly from tax-hating Republican members of Congress, has decided it needs help, and has announced plans to contract with four commercial debt collection agencies to go after those who have insufficiently rendered unto Caesar.

Yes, folks, after years of the IRS warning you that it would never contact you directly by phone to demand payment of taxes, it is now contracting with professional debt harvesters who are authorized to contact you directly by phone to demand payment of taxes.

This is not good, and not only because it will make it far more difficult for the average citizen to differentiate between legitimate tax collection and the ubiquitous scams in which despicable thieves call citizens directly and demand payment of an alleged tax debt.

When I was working as a contractor for the Air Force, I learned about the concept of inherently governmental functions. What this meant in practical terms was that there were certain things that I, as a contractor, was not permitted to do. I could, for instance, go to meetings as a representative of the Air Force office I supported, but could not define an official Air Force position on an issue or commit the Air Force to any expense or course of action. I was permitted only to take notes and report back to my government customer, who would then decide what to do and take the appropriate action.

One definition** states that an inherently governmental function is “a function so intimately related to the public interest as to require performance by Federal Government employees.” In my opinion, for what it's worth***, the collection of taxes - the ability of an agency of the federal government legally to seize my wealth and punish me if I fail to give it up - is the very definition of an inherently governmental function. In what universe is it appropriate for a commercial entity to wield such power?

So, Dear Readers, be very careful in the future when somebody calls you on the phone and says they're representing the IRS and demanding payment of a tax debt. Supposedly, the IRS will have first sent you a letter telling you to expect contact from a collection agency before anyone calls you. This means that now, not only do you have to worry about scam phone calls, but you also need to carefully review and confirm the authenticity of any letter you receive that claims to be from the IRS.

And that, friends, is an inherently personal ass-covering function.

Have a good day. Beware of scammers.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* King James Version.

** In The Federal Activities Inventory Reform (FAIR) Act of 1998. 

*** Not much, I can tell you.