Thursday, July 21, 2011

Vive le Difference!

The day is off to an ugly start - our coffee machine is acting up and doing nothing but squirting grainy brown sludge into my waiting cup. I hope this is not a harbinger of things to come.

Being thus thrown off my stride even before 5:00 AM, I'll just fall back on an old item from my ya-ha collection ... I don't remember if I've used this one before, but if I have, that's too bad ... it's still funny. And pretty much accurate, as far as I can tell.

How to tell Republicans from Democrats

Democrats buy books that have been banned somewhere.
Republicans form censorship committees and read them as a group.

Democrats give their worn-out clothes to those less fortunate.
Republicans wear theirs.

Democrats name their children after currently popular sports figures, politicians, and entertainers.
Republicans name their children after their parents or grandparents, according to where the money is.

Republicans tend to keep their shades drawn, although there is seldom any reason why they should.
Democrats ought to, but don't.

Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but believe that they're entitled to a little fun first.

Democrats make plans and then do something else.
Republicans follow the plans their grandfathers made.

Republicans sleep in twin beds--some even in separate rooms.
That is why there are more Democrats.

Any other differences I missed? Leave them in the comments.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.



The Mistress of the Dark said...

Democrats are half-assed..
Republicians are...the whole ass...

Raquel's World said...

Loved it all even Mistress's comment

Starr said...

I love your work. I am a hack and you are the pro. You have recently become a daily read for me and I have linked you to my new little blog.
Now that I have schmoozed you a bit, what are the chances that you will give me permission to post this there?

Bilbo said...

Starr, thank you so much for the compliment! Feel free to cross-post anything you like, and to recommend my little corner of cyberspace to all your friends. Welcome to the family!

Starr said...

What a lovely welcoming note, I thank you. I will try really hard not to make my little blog a zerox of yours...but you do some really cool stuff and I suspect I will be tempted daily! A man who communicates...and DANCES too ...your lovely wife is a lucky woman!!

KathyA said...

No, Bill, I think you've covered it!