The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2024

I've been considering this award for a while, but wasn't sure when to award it. As we draw closer to the election and the hysteria builds, it seems like now is the right time.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, I hereby present the tinfoil and toilet paper crown designating

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2024

to

The "Election Integrity" Zealots

The United States has been electing presidents since George Washington took the office in 1789. Since that time, we have elected a total of 46 presidents (45, actually, since one of them, Grover Cleveland, was elected to two nonconsecutive terms). Between 1789 and 2016, the elections were generally carried out and the new presidents took their oaths of office with minimum fuss ... except for the election of 1872 (documented by CNN anchor Dana Bash in her new book America's Deadliest Election), the 2000 election, which the Supreme Court gave to George W. Bush*, and the 2020 election, which was contested by a violent mob egged on by the loser. 

Now, urged on by the rhetoric of an angry, petty, vindictive, thin-skinned wannabe tyrant who refuses to admit error or loss, a whole cottage industry has arisen in this country, dedicated to sowing doubt about the accuracy and fairness of elections their candidate loses. Election deniers, almost exclusively Republicans, insist that their candidates can only lose when their opponents cheat, and insist on new, intrusive measures to ensure "election integrity."

The "election integrity" zealots absolutely believe - in the complete absence of evidence - that Republican candidates only lose because vast numbers of illegal voters swamp the polls with their ballots. Although few if any of these zealots have ever trained or worked as election officials, they nevertheless work tirelessly to solve this nonexistent problem by attempting to make it more difficult for everyone to vote, by means of measures like:

- Purging voter rolls of people who have not voted in recent elections, even if they are otherwise properly registered;

- Eliminating or severely restricting availability of mail-in or absentee ballots; 

- Refusing to accept mail-in or absentee ballots postmarked on or before, but received after election day - at the present time, the number of days mail-in ballots can be accepted for counting after election day varies by state, from a low of 3 days in Kansas to a high of 14 in Illinois. 

- Removing most secure ballot drop boxes, making it difficult to find one in a safe and convenient location; 

- Requiring documentary proof of citizenship* to register to vote (under U.S. Supreme Court precedent, people may vote in federal elections by attesting to U.S. citizenship under penalty for perjury, without providing documentary proof); and,

- Making it illegal for non-citizens to vote in federal elections (ignoring the fact that it is already illegal for non-citizens to vote in federal elections).

The fact that there has been no evidence of illegal voting in numbers that would come remotely close to affecting the outcome of any federal election does not slow those anxious to impose harsh solutions in search of imagined problems. At best, the "Election Integrity" Zealots simply enrich lawyers by gumming up the system with useless litigation; at worst, they sow mistrust among citizens in the integrity of their elections and the people who administer them.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, we present the Right-Cheek Ass Clown Award this month to the "Election Integrity" Zealots ... people who - without any knowledge of what they're talking about - are working relentlessly to undermine your confidence in the honesty, accuracy, and security of your elections.

Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for the first Cartoon Saturday of our annual Halloween Month celebration, celebrating everyone's favorite man of many parts - Frankenstein. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* Supreme Court decision in Bush v Gore, 2000.

** What constitutes proof of citizenship? In general, an official copy of your birth certificate, a Consular Report of Birth Abroad (State Department form FS-240), or a passport ... but how many of you can readily lay hands on an official copy of your birth certificate or your FS-240? And how many everyday Americans have a passport?