Great Moments in Editing and Signage

How better to close out a week of weirdness than with a new collection of editorial and signage bloopers?

Need any old people? ...

No comment ...

You can save money by ordering a meal that includes its own beverage ...

I think there's one business that's going to do really well in the next four years ...

Der Furor's Department of Labor is strongly supporting schools like this ...

I don't think this sign appeared during the search for new Cabinet officers ...

Say, what?? ...

It's part of the business model for for-profit prisons ...

I've heard that models manufactured in Septober tend to be better made ...

Only in Texas ...

And that's it for this week ... I hope you had a laugh at some editor's or sign-painter's expense, and that you'll remember to send your Great Moments to me for future use.

Have a good day and get ready for your last pre-Furor weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

National Hat Day

Today, January 15th, is National Hat Day, on which people are encouraged to wear their favorite hats or hats particular to their occupation. Nurses wear their caps, chefs wear their toques, football players and firefighters wear their helmets, military personnel wear their berets, kepis, field caps, flight caps, or "wheels," and other workers wear their specialized headgear to work and to various events. Or just for the hell of it ...

A side note about military headgear: dress hats worn by field-grade (majors, lieutenant colonels, and colonels) and general officers in the Air Force are decorated with embroidered clouds and lightning bolts, and are colloquially known as "darts and farts" hats; the embroidered acorns and oak leaves on the hats worn by senior Army personnel are called "scrambled eggs."

January 15th was supposedly chosen as National Hat Day in part because it commemorates the day in 1797 when, according to a possibly apocryphal story, haberdasher John Hetherington wore a "tall silk hat" so unusual that caused a riot. According to a report of the day,

John Hetherington... was arraigned before the Lord Mayor yesterday on a charge of breach of the peace and inciting to riot, and was required to give bonds in the sum of £500 [for having] appeared upon the public highway wearing upon his head what he called a silk hat... a tall structure, having a shiny lustre, and calculated to frighten timid people.... several women fainted at the unusual sight, while children screamed, dogs yelped, and a young [boy] was thrown down by the crowd which had collected and had his right arm broken. 

 

And lest we forget, the latest in popular headgear, particularly on the extreme right, is the tinfoil hat, supposedly worn for protection against mind control by the evil government, surveillance by aliens, or other imagined persecutions. Tinfoil hats come in many styles, from the most basic ...

to the most complex and exotic ...

Tinfoil hats are available in a wide range of looks to match every stylistic desire ... 

And for those who are especially worried, there are options for whole-body protection... 

Have a good National Hat Day, and wear those lids with pride!

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

The Supreme Court and the Seven Deadly Sins

I have long been fascinated by the Christian* tradition of the Seven Deadly Sins, and I've written several posts about them and their manifestation in the modern world. In case you're not familiar with the Seven Deadly Sins, they are

Pride - pride is considered the original and the worst of the seven deadly sins. It leads to irrational self-confidence, impulsiveness, and an unwillingness to seek or heed good advice. Vainglory (unjustified boasting**) is considered a form of pride.

Greed - an inordinate desire to acquire or possess more than one needs, especially wealth.

Wrath - uncontrolled feelings of rage or hatred, or a desire for vengeance for perceived wrongs.

Envy - sad or resentful covetousness towards the traits or possessions of someone else.

Lust - while we think of lust in the sense of intense sexual desire, it actually means an fierce desire for anything, such as money, power, or social position.

Gluttony - usually thought of in terms of gross overeating, it is the overindulgence or overconsumption of anything to the point of waste.

Sloth - indolence, laziness, or the habitual avoidance of exertion. Unlike the other six deadly sins, sloth is a sin of omission (the failure to perform ones responsibilities) rather than commission (of some act that is wrong or immoral).

It occurs to me that most of the conservative members of the Supreme Court reflect one or more of the Seven Deadly Sins:

Greed, Wrath, and Envy mark Justice Clarence Thomas. His eager acceptance of gifts and services from wealthy friends and patrons, regardless of the perception of ethical compromise, are clear examples of greed, while his disdainful refusal to even consider them to be a problem, and his accusation that those who point out such problems are motivated by racism rather than concern for justice shows wrath. He is also guilty of envy, which drives him to seek from questionably ethical sources the better things of life he believes his meager salary as a Supreme Court justice denies him.

Greed, Wrath, and Pride mark Justice Samuel Alito. Like Justice Thomas, Justice Alito happily accepts questionable gifts (greed), bristles at any criticism of his behavior (wrath), and clearly believes he's above criticism, anyhow (pride).

Sloth and Pride mark Chief Justice John Roberts. His foot-dragging reluctance to lead the court to a clear stand on politically difficult decisions (sloth) undercuts his role as the Chief Justice, while and his tone-deaf defense of a court that has a clear crisis of public confidence (pride) reflects a reluctance to deal with the obvious.

Lust and Gluttony seem to work well for Justice Brett Kavanaugh, although he's tried to keep his head down after the exposure of his college era drinking and sexual issues during his confirmation hearings. "I like beer" is not the sort of historic quote one expects to hear in that environment.

Sloth applies to Justice Neil Gorsuch insofar as his emphasis on "textualism" and "originalism" reflects a reluctance to deal with the intellectual and moral difficulty of interpreting a 250-year-old Constitution to account for political and social conditions its drafters never imagined.

I'm not sure yet which (if any) of the deadly sins Amy Coney Barrett represents ... so far, she's a bit of an unknown quantity, generally very conservative, but with sudden flashes of independence and a willingness to work with the liberal justices. If I update this post in the future, perhaps I'll have more of an idea. 

While I'm dumping on the conservative wing of the court, are the three liberal justices guilty of any of the Seven Deadly Sins? Not to the same extent as Thomas, Alito, Roberts, Kavanaugh, and Gorsuch, although I think that anyone who reaches a seat on the Supreme Court is at the very least probably guilty from time to time of the sin of pride.

And in less than a week, the Court must contend with a new president who embodies all seven of the deadly sins. This is not likely to turn out well.

Have a good day, and try to avoid the Seven Deadly Sins.

Believe me, I know it's hard.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Actual Christian, not Republican Christian.

** And who is the poster child for vainglory?

The Decline of Public Speaking

Unlike many people, I enjoy public speaking. I've been a member of several Toastmasters International clubs over the years, and have won prizes in public speaking contests. I've spoken in front of audiences as small as two and as large as more than a thousand, and often serve as a master of ceremonies for various events. I also judge high school speech and debate competitions (having been originally volunteered by my granddaughter, whose debate team needs to provide judges to participate in competitions). And while I enjoy public speaking, I also enjoy listening to a well-crafted, well-delivered speech that combines good preparation with skill of delivery appropriate to the subject and the occasion.

I've been thinking a lot about public speaking lately, because there isn't much of it that's very good any more. As Hansell Duckett once noted, "What this country needs is more free speech worth listening to."

I'm currently reading "Hitler: Ascent (1889-1939)," book one of a two-volume biography by Volker Ullrich. It's common nowadays to compare Der Furor to Hitler, and - as this detailed, thoroughly researched, and very readable biography demonstrates - comparisons of their personalities, methods, actions, and general behavior are very much on the mark ... with one major exception, as my friend Trang pointed out in her comment on my Facebook post recommending the book:

"There's one big difference between Hitler with his oratory skills and der Furor whose lack of eloquence is astounding. The man can't ever seem to utter a complete sentence that makes sense."

Trang's comment was spot-on. Whatever else he may have been, Adolf Hitler was a spellbinding orator with a brilliant ability to match his preparation and delivery to the audience. Der Furor, on the other hand, is a terrible speaker - his speeches are not the focused, compelling addresses of an educated statesman speaking with the gravitas of office, but stream-of-consciousness monologs, full of bizarre claims, childish insults, gross misrepresentations, rambling non sequiturs, and self-indulgent blather. It's a style he likes to call "the weave" as if it were some profoundly brilliant oratorical technique only he can master, and one that appeals to less-educated audiences with short attention spans, who want to be entertained rather than informed or persuaded. If Der Furor were to compete in any high school speech contest I was judging, I'd have to seek the organizer's permission to give him a low enough score.

Now consider last week's funeral of former president Jimmy Carter. Speaker after speaker gave heartfelt, excellent eulogies ... not an easy type of presentation to write or deliver. Each eulogy brilliantly mixed love, respect, and humor in memory of a man remembered less as a great president than as a decent and humble human being. I cannot imagine that Der Furor could have risen to the challenge of the moment, and I cringe* to think of what will happen if we need to have a state funeral while he is in office. In July of 2022 I wrote a blog post reimagining the Gettysburg Address as Der Furor would have  delivered it that can serve as an example of the sort of soaring presidential rhetoric we can expect again in the next four years.

A few years ago, drama and theater critic Peter Marks wrote, “... if you’ve ever listened to some of the desultory rhetoric from the well of the Senate, you know that American politics has not exactly built an assembly line of Ciceros.” We live in a time when attention spans are short and good public speaking is insufficiently valued. It's a time when crude tweets that sow hatred and division carry more weight than soaring oration that inspires and motivates. 

And that's sad.

Have a good day, and support your local school's speech and debate clubs.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Yes, I know it's on the banished words list for this year, but it just seemed right.

Musical Sunday

Break's over, back on your heads, as the old joke goes. The last few Musical Sundays have been dedicated to the sort of beautiful songs that make me feel good, but as January 20th approaches and we see more and more of the coming buffoonery, it's time to start working some more ... timely ... songs into the mix. I think this one does a good job of exposing the duplicity at the core of the MAGA hierarchy ...

Sorry about the injury done to Tennessee Ernie Ford's classic protest tune, "Sixteen Tons." Here are the lyrics:

Some people say they can’t find engineers

For workin’ this country and buildin’ careers

It’s not so much that there is a dearth

They just don’t want to pay what they’re worth

[chorus]

You hire H1-B, what do you get?

An immigrant willing to slave and sweat

Don’t have to pay much ‘cause if you let ‘em go

They can’t stay ‘round this country no mo’

When running for office just to rile up his base

Donald said immigrants would leave this place

Vivek and Elon said “do what you’re told”

“Now we’re in charge, time to pay what we’re owed”

[chorus]

Vivek wants to guarantee our livelihood

Says American culture just ain’t no good

“Stop venerating jocks,” I heard him preach

“We need to worship Urkel and Screech”

[chorus]

Elon is stuck with his Twitter site

Where Nazi’s and MAGA continue to fight

He can’t help yelling to the MAGA base:

“Take a big step back, fuck yourself in the face”

[chorus]

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo 

Cartoon Saturday

Okay, I'm ready to send this week back for a refund  ...

Disgraced attorney and former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani was found in contempt of court (for the second time, by different judges) for his endless stonewalling of attempts to get him to satisfy the $148 judgement against him for defaming two Georgia election workers; in a narrow 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court declined to stop Der Furor's sentencing on his New York hush-money convictions, and he was duly sentenced (although without punishment) by Judge Juan Merchan; in a press conference at Mar-a-Lago that was crazy even by his standards, Der Furor proposed renaming the Gulf of Mexico as the "Gulf of America"; the North Carolina Supreme Court blocked the certification of Democratic Justice Allison Riggs as the winner of her state Supreme Court race because her GOP opponent challenged the legitimacy of 60,000 ballots; Edgar Welch, the man who in 2017 entered Comet Ping Pong, a pizza restaurant in Washington, D.C., armed with an assault rifle and loaded revolver in search of an alleged child sex ring linked to Hillary Clinton, was killed by police in Charlotte, NC, when he resisted arrest on a charge of felony probation violation; and in Malta, authorities finally repaired some local roads after someone spray-painted penises around hazardous but long-unrepaired potholes. 

With all the crazy political news, we need something exciting to take our minds off the prospect of Der Furor taking office in a mere nine days. Sex ought to do it ... 

It's not just a human problem ...

Like I just said ...

Well, at least he's doggedly pursuing it ...

Didn't know the leaning tower was male, did you?

The bride of Frankenstein isn't impressed ...

Uh ... I'll just bet she is ...

He forgot to write himself a reminder of where he hid it ...

Busted!

As robots come more and more into the mainstream, this could be a significant issue in the future ...

From dough boy to hard roll? 

 

And that's it for our NSFW-lite collection of cartoons for this week. I hope it helped take your mind off the impending change of administrations.

Have a good day and a great weekend, and be sure to come back tomorrow for the first Musical Sunday of 2025 and more thoughts. See you then.

Bilbo

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for January, 2025

Well, Friends, a new year is upon us, and at just over a week old, it promises to provide broad new horizons of ass clownery with the start of the 119th Congress, the return of Der Furor to the presidency, and the spread of social, political, and religious lunacy across the nation and around the world. The evidence of this first week indicates that this will be another year in which the vast number of candidates will make the selection of individual ass clowns for dishonor difficult, but someone's got to step up to the challenge, and it'll continue to be yours truly.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, let's blare those trumpets and roll those drums as we announce the first award for the new year - 

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for January, 2025

and the winner is

America's Billionaire Class

You can argue, as many have, that the capitalist market system is responsible for the fundamental strength of America and the delivery of the standard of living we enjoy ... at least, the one we enjoyed a bit more when it was more affordable. But the capitalist market system has also produced the socio-economic structure we now have, in which 95% of the wealth is concentrated in the hands of a tiny few, and the middle-class dream of home ownership and higher education has grown increasingly out of reach. It has produced a system in which the ratio of CEO wealth to worker wealth vastly favors the upper crust.

I firmly believe that hard work and ingenuity should be rewarded, and that a person who has created value for others is entitled to a portion of that wealth as a reward for their success. The problem we have today is that we no longer recognize the concept of enough. 

I like to think that I have enough. Enough to live in a comfortable home. Enough to put food on the table. Enough to help out my children when they need it. Enough to take an occasional nice vacation. I have enough.

But how much is enough if you're an Elon Musk or a Mark Zuckerberg? If you earn more in an hour than your employees earn in a year or two? If you can afford two (or three, or four) homes in different states or on different continents? Is that enough?

Elon Musk spent a quarter of a billion dollars to get Der Furor elected. Enough to hire teachers and build schools, enough to improve healthcare, enough to repair crumbling roads and bridges. Instead, this man chose to spend a small part of his fortune to elect a flawed, incompetent charlatan to the presidency.

The billionaire class has spent an enormous amount of money contributing to Der Furor's inauguration events and parties. I'm guessing it won't be enough to help them when he eventually turns on them.

Billionaire CEOs with employees who live paycheck-to-paycheck have more than enough, and should be happy to share the bounty with those who do the work that makes them rich. At the very least, they should be prepared to pay their fair share of taxes to support the system that benefits them. They should recognize that, as President Obama once reminded them, to a storm of scorn, that they had a lot of help from ordinary people to realize their fortunes.

Read this report published in October of 2024 by the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis - "The State of US Wealth Inequality." Here are two of the Key Takeaways:

- The top 10% of households by wealth had $6.9 million on average. As a group, they held 67% of total household wealth.

 

- The bottom 50% of households by wealth had $51,000 on average. As a group, they held only 2.5% of total household wealth.

Household wealth distribution in the United States in the 3rd quarter of 2024 looks like this, according to data from the Federal Reserve as of December 20th, 2024:

- The top 1% owns $27.10 trillion.

- The bottom 50% owns $3.89 trillion. 

If you've had to decide between medical care and food, shelter, or clothing, or if you've had to work multiple jobs to make ends meet, you can justly criticize those at the very top of the economic ladder.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for January, 2025 is America's Billionaire Class. Think about them if you are far enough down the economic ladder to realize that you and your children don't have enough.

And if you've had enough, plan to vote out the billionaires in 2026 and 2030.

Have as good a day as you can afford, and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday, when we will try to spice up your January with some cartoons praising the horizontal tango.

More thoughts then.

Bilbo.

The Banished Words List for 2025

In going through my old posts, I found one from back in January of 2010 (15 years ago, yikes!) titled "Banned Words List," in which I visited a list published by the faculty and staff of Lake Superior State University, the official name of which is "Words Banished for Mis-use, Over-use and General Uselessness."

I'd long forgotten about LSSU's Banished Words list* until I rediscovered that old post, and was delighted to look it up and find that it's still going strong. Here is the list for 2025, which contains some words and expressions I've not heard ... I guess I move in the wrong circles:

1. Cringe. It's apparently become cringe-worthy through overuse.

2. Game Changer. It seems that since almost every new idea or product is a game changer, the expression no longer means anything. 

3. Era. Apparently, everything popular is enjoying its "era." Who knew? I think the only worthwhile recent use of the word was to name Taylor Swift's phenomenally successful multi-year tour.

4. Dropped. Books, music, and all kinds of unnecessary things are currently being dropped rather than published, released, or offered for sale. This is dumb. I think it should also disappear in its alter ego of "mic drop" to indicate an emphatic conclusion to something. 

5. IYKYK (If You Know, You Know). I agree that this is a useless, irritating, and nonsensical phrase that means nothing. Good riddance.

6. Sorry Not Sorry. A disingenuous, half-hearted apology pretending to be honest.

7. Skibidi. I'd never heard this word before, so I had to look it up. As near as I can tell, it seems to be a meaningless word used to initiate meaningless conversations which lead eventually to brain rot.

8. 100%. This is another expression I hadn't heard much recently, but which has apparently been overused as a term indicating full agreement. The last time I recall hearing it was in the Dr Seuss story "Horton Hatches the Egg," in which Horton the elephant explains why he keeps sitting on the egg by saying, "I meant what I said and I said what I meant - an elephant's faithful, one hundred percent."

9. Utilize. I've hated this one for years. Real People say "use" ... people who want to sound important say "utilize." Please don't say it to me ... I worked in the Pentagon long enough to learn to despise it.

10. Period. It's been used to death to emphasize finality of argument ("I've done all I can, period!").

There are other words and expressions I'd banish, given the power. These include:

- Mandate**. This is constantly used by Republicans to claim that a narrow plurality of the popular vote constitutes justification for proceeding with a radical agenda most people wouldn't support if it was honestly presented. The word is often used not by itself, but with the dishonest adjectives historic, resounding, or decisive.

And,

- MAGA***. If ever a term has been overused, it's this one. Let's just drive a stake in it.  

How about you, Dear Readers? What are the words or expressions you would ban if you had the power? Leave a comment and let the rest of us know.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* Which has been published every year since 1976 - 49 years!

** I'm shocked that self-styled GOP "alpha males" would use a term like "mandate," given that it might be interpreted as something horrifyingly gay.

*** Of course, there are a lot of really great take-offs on MAGA, the best of which include "Make Attorneys Get Attorneys" and "My Ass Got Arrested." These can stay.

Congressional Shoutings

Now that the GOP members of the House of Representatives have managed to get their feces in one sock long enough to elect a Speaker, they will be able to get on with their most eagerly awaited activity: the scheduling of Congressional Shoutings.

They used to be called "Hearings," but experience shows that these sessions are less about "hearing" testimony and evidence and more about "shouting" at witnesses in an effort to score points and create media sound bites; therefore, a more appropriate name is "Congressional Shoutings."

If you've ever watched the sober and dignified behavior of Ohio Representative Jim Jordan as he chairs the House Judiciary Committee, or the solemn and courtly manner in which Kentucky Representative James Comer conducts the business of the House Oversight and Accountability Committee, you know what I mean.

It's going to be a long couple of years.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

January 6th

On this date in 2021, a howling mob of Der Furor's supporters stormed the United States Capitol in an attempt to disrupt the certification of the 2020 presidential election. The entire nation watched on live television as a huge riot overwhelmed police, resulted in five deaths, hundreds of injuries, and millions of dollars in damage to the Capitol Building, and, in the end, failed to stop the counting of electoral votes and the certification of Joe Biden's victory.

Since that time, Der Furor and his supporters - including spineless Republican members of Congress who cowered in their hiding places during the riot, have worked tirelessly to rewrite and whitewash the events of that day. They claim the rioters who smashed windows in the Capitol and smeared feces on its walls, sprayed police officers with bear spray and beat them with American flags, were nothing more than simple tourists enjoying a visit. They claim that evidence the riot was a "peaceful protest" was ignored and then destroyed. They attempt to picture the members of the House Select Committee that investigated the insurrection as "thugs." They claim that rioters responsible for wild vandalism and violence convicted of their crimes and sentenced to prison for their behavior are "political prisoners."

And in just two weeks, Der Furor - the man who even now refuses to acknowledge his loss of the 2020 election, the man who inflamed a violent mob and sent it to the Capitol, the man who whines about being persecuted while he pursues vengeance against those who defend the truth - will once again take the oath of office he has already defiled. He has pledged to pardon rioters who were arrested, tried, convicted, and  imprisoned "on day one."

Do not forget what actually happened that day. Read the Report of the January 6th investigation and look at the evidence for yourselves, and do it soon, before a GOP-controlled Congress moves to bury it. Do not allow Der Furor and his besotted followers to, in the words of Washington Post opinion writer Margaret Sullivan, "go full Orwell" on all of us.

Remember what actually happened before your eyes on January 6th, 2021 ... and what could easily happen again if we let it.

Have a good day. Defend democracy against those who would take it away from you.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo