40-ish | 48 |
Adventurer | Has had more partners than you ever will |
Athletic | Flat-chested |
Average looking | Ugly |
Beautiful | Pathological liar |
Contagious Smile | Bring your penicillin |
Educated | College dropout |
Emotionally Secure | Medicated |
Feminist | Fat; ball buster |
Free spirit | Substance user |
Friendship first | Trying to live down reputation as slut |
Fun | Annoying |
Gentle | Comatose |
Good Listener | Borderline Autistic |
New-Age | All body hair, all the time |
Old-fashioned | Lights out, missionary position only |
Open-minded | Desperate |
Outgoing | Loud |
Passionate | Loud |
Poet | Depressive Schzophrenic |
Professional | Real Witch |
Redhead | Shops the Clairol section |
Reubenesque | Grossly Fat |
Romantic | Looks better by candle light |
Voluptuous | Very Fat |
Weight proportional to height | Hugely Fat |
Wants Soulmate | One step away from stalking |
Widow | Nagged first husband to death |
Young at heart | Toothless crone |
And now for the men ...
40-ish | 52 and looking for 25-yr-old |
Athletic | Sits on the couch and watches ESPN |
Average looking | Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back |
Educated | Will always treat you like an idiot |
Free Spirit | Sleeps with your sister |
Friendship first | As long as friendship involves nudity |
Fun | Good with a remote and a six pack |
Good looking | Arrogant |
Honest | Pathological Liar |
Huggable | Overweight, more body hair than a bear |
Like to cuddle | Insecure, overly dependent |
Mature | Until you get to know him |
Open-minded | Wants to sleep with your sister but she's not interested |
Physically fit | I spend a lot of time in front of mirror admiring myself |
Poet | Has written on a bathroom stall |
Spiritual | Once went to church with his grandmother on Easter Sunday |
Stable | Occasional stalker, but never arrested |
Thoughtful | Says "Please" when demanding a beer |
Any additions? Put them into the comments.
2 comments:
I'm thoughtful.
LOL! What a GOOD LAUGH!
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