The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for June, 2026

A new month brings new opportunities to recognize those who strive to distinguish themselves by rising above the prevailing high level of ass clownery. The job of singling out the awardees doesn't get any easier, but I will rise once again to the occasion and do the tough work of skimming the surface of the swirling cesspool of lunacy in search of the biggest chunk.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, it gives me no particular pleasure to announce

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for June, 2026

and the award goes to

Director of National Intelligence Designee

(Recently Withdrawn)

Bill Pulte

SPECIAL NOTE: I actually wrote this award earlier in the week, when the Pulte nomination was announced. Since then, the degree of horrified pushback from both sides of the Congressional aisle led Der Furor on Thursday to withdraw Pulte's nomination and replace him with - are you ready? - yet another individual with absolutely no intelligence or military experience, Jay Clayton*, U.S. Attorney for the Southern District of New York and former Chairman of the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC). I decided to just go ahead and give Mr Pulte this award with some minor editing, in recognition of his demonstrated willingness to abuse a position of trust in the service of Der Furor's vengeance program. Read on.

In a regime already noteworthy for the number of unqualified individuals appointed to positions of national responsibility, Der Furor's designation of real estate magnate and current director of the Federal Housing Finance Agency Bill Pulte to be the Director of National Intelligence deserves special opprobrium.

Replacing hapless nonentity Tulsi Gabbard, who at least had military service if not the required intelligence experience, with Bill Pulte, who had neither, led even a handful of spineless Congressional Republicans to question the wisdom of the appointment. Mr Pulte's sole "qualification" for the DNI position is his unquestioning and unwavering dedication to Der Furor, and his willingness to exploit his government position to support Der Furor's search for revenge against his political enemies. 

There really isn't much more to say about the appalling depths to which we have sunk when one of the most sensitive and important national security positions in the government is handed to the hackiest of political hacks.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for June, 2026, is Bill Pulte, the unqualified vengeance monkey who very nearly became the nation's most senior intelligence manager and Blackmail Enabler in Chief. Our foreign enemies surely recoil in fear at the depth of our professional intelligence leadership bench.

Have a good day and be sure to come back tomorrow for a Cartoon Saturday look at the increasingly expensive luxury of dining out. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* Mr Clayton does, however, offer the advantageous qualification of having been part of regime efforts to slow-walk the release of the Epstein files.