Friday, October 06, 2017

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2017

The seemingly endless year of 2017 is grinding mercilessly on, filled with legal, meteorological, natural, and other disasters piling on top of each other in a relentless assault. And if hurricanes, earthquakes, wildfires weren't enough, we continue to add layers of ass clownery atop the misery to make it worse.

We've made it to the beginning of October, and so it's time to announce the first of our Ass Clown awards for the month. It's always hard to separate the chaff from the lesser chaff, but it's my job and so I'll step up to it.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, today we do something special. Today, we announce not only

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2017

but also our first

Lifetime Achievement Award
Superior Ass-Clownery

and the award goes to nine-time previous winner

Donald J. Trump

By presenting this award, I realize I may be accused of simply picking low-hanging fruit. But in my defense, I would point out that few people have worked so tirelessly to prove themselves worthy of this dishonor. Although Mr Trump had already won the award a staggering nine times (either by himself or in combination with another recipient), he has continued to raise the ass-clownery bar (or lower it, depending on how you view things). In the two weeks alone, he has:

- Insulted and demeaned the people of Puerto Rico, including direct personal attacks on the mayor of San Juan, who had criticized the administration's response to the devastation left on the island by Hurricane Maria, and implying that the island had not suffered a "real catastrophe" like Hurricane Katrina.

- Continued a useless and distracting squabble with the National Football League over players' peaceful protests of violence against minorities.

- Spent a weekend at his exclusive golf resort in Bedminster, NJ, while millions of Americans were still reeling from the disaster of Hurricane Maria ... including dedicating a golf trophy to the people of Puerto Rico at a time when most of the island still lacked functioning hospitals, clean water, power, and basic communications connectivity.

With presentation of this Lifetime Achievement award to Mr Trump, he is longer eligible for future Left-Cheek, Right-Cheek, or On-Crack awards, and becomes the first member of the Ass Clownery Hall of Fame.

We deserve better.

Have a good day. Come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday, when we start our four-weekend Halloween celebration - more thoughts then.


* The Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson, was reported to have called Mr Trump a "moron" during a meeting at the Pentagon this past summer, a comment he did not directly deny when questioned by reporters.


John A Hill said...


Mike said...

Nine times eh? Should we start a pool to guess how many times he'll make the list over the next three years?

allenwoodhaven said...

A good choice, as always. Sometimes low hanging fruit is low hanging because it is so heavy.

Lifetime Achievement Award for Superior Ass-Clownery is a good title and, I hope, will be rarely needed.
Unfortunately, the way things have been going, I fear there will be many Ass-Clowns who earn this emeritus distinction.

Unknown said...

Should we start a pool to guess how many times he'll make the list over the next three years?


Kristen Drittsekkdatter said...

The logical choice.