The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2025

Not without trepidation, we have entered the month of October, which does not augur any improvement over any of the previous nine months, but does offer us the opportunity to recognize new achievements in ass clownery. The competition remains as fierce as ever, yet the burden of selecting appropriate designees remains and must be met. Therefore, with the usual flatulent blare of trumpets, we announce presentation of the tinfoil and toilet paper crown to

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2025

"Border Czar"

Tom Homan

Der Furor's pugnacious "Border Czar," a full-throated champion of the crackdown on immigrants (and citizens caught up in its wide nets), and a key figure in the administration's massive deportation efforts, was recorded by undercover FBI agents in September of 2024 accepting $50,000 in cash in exchange for a promise of lucrative government contracts in a potential second administration led by Der Furor. 

The investigation of Mr Homan, which began during the Biden administration, was shut down by political appointees at the FBI and Justice Department last month. 

For his part, Mr Homan denied during a Fox News interview that he had done anything wrong, but did not deny accepting the cash, and White House deputy press secretary Abigail Jackson predictably declared the now-canceled federal criminal probe a “blatantly political investigation, which found no evidence of illegal activity.” She went on to claim that the investigation was concocted by Biden Justice Department appointees “to target President Trump’s allies.” FBI Director Kash Patel and Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche declared in a joint statement that investigators had found "no credible evidence of any criminal wrongdoing” by Homan and that “as a result, the investigation has been closed.”

It is, of course, entirely possible that the investigation of Mr Homan's alleged actions might have been dropped regardless of which political party was in power, but the decision to drop the investigation now gives at least the appearance of sweeping illegal activity under the rug.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for October, 2025, is Der Furor's Border Czar Tom Homan ... with an honorable mention to FBI Director Patel and Deputy Attorney General Blanche for quashing the investigation that could have resolved any question of wrongdoing on Mr Homan's part and thereby thickening the cloud of mistrust and abuse of power that is a hallmark of the current administration.

Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for more thoughts and the first of our traditional Halloween-inspired Cartoon Saturdays, kicking off with a salute to Frankenstein ... or, if you're a purist, to Frankenstein's monster. Whatever.

See you then.

Bilbo

Can Congress Be Fixed?

I'll be 74 years old next month, and in all that time I've never seen Congress in such a mess. Neither party has leadership worthy of the name, the majority party refuses even to hold discussions with the minority, and the last time a budget was passed under the normal process ("regular order") was fiscal year 1997. The 119th Congress is clearly the most useless in history.

What went wrong? Lots of ink has been spilled trying to answer that question, and the answer generally depends on the political leanings of the person offering an opinion. There are lots of articles, manifestos, OpEds, memes, and other screeds which offer suggestions for fixing the rot, some of which are silly and unworkable, but many of which are promising, if unlikely (for various reasons) ever to be adopted. Here are a few that I think show potential for returning Congress to something resembling other than a adult playroom:

1. Impose Term Limits. The Constitution limits Presidents to two terms, but places no similar limits on members of Congress. Unlimited terms allow individual members to accumulate power based on longevity rather than competence, and imposing term limits would bring regular infusions of new blood and ideas. A good balance of new and experienced members could be achieved by limiting Senators to two six-year terms and Representatives to six two-year terms, for a total of 12 years.

2. Adopt Flexible Rates of Pay. Set the salary of each member at the median income for the state they represent. This will ensure that members understand their constituents' financial reality.

3. Require Members of Congress to Obtain Health Insurance from the Exchanges in their Home States. Coupled with pay calculation described above, this will ensure that members understand the health care problems their constituents face, and help focus them on developing fair and workable solutions.

4. Conduct Routine Business Remotely. There are many options for secure online communication which will allow members of Congress to remain in their districts, close to their constituents, while conducting most ordinary legislative business. The full Congress could assemble periodically, perhaps quarterly or semiannually, for in-person sessions to conduct business or hold hearings that can not be conducted remotely.

5. Require Single-Issue Legislation. Omnibus legislation running to thousands of pages and larded with "poison pills" for political advantage are opaque, an invitation to corrupt deal-making, and insult to the citizens. Congress needs to return to the traditional budget process (regular order) and adopt a system of single-issue legislation to improve focus and understanding.

6. Bring Back Campaign Finance Limits. Terrible Supreme Court decisions like Citizens United allow corporations and the wealthy to pump unlimited amounts of money to their preferred candidates, giving these a dominant voice in the political process and ensuring that elected officials are beholden to their wealthiest campaign donors rather than the average voter. Campaign finance limits must be reimposed and enforced to reduce opportunities for corruption and ensure fairness in representation.

7. Require Members of Congress to Recuse Themselves from Drafting and Voting on Legislation in Which They Have Personal Financial Interest. The authority of Congress is diminished when there is an appearance of conflicts of interest.

More needs to be done, but this would be a good start ... something to think about as we begin yet another fiscal year with no budget.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo