The way the economy is nowadays, the latest status symbol is a job. If you have one, you’re lucky. If you enjoy it, you're doubly lucky.
The Wall Street Journal recently looked at 200 different jobs, and this past Tuesday published it’s list of the best and worst jobs in the U.S. The results were interesting. The top five (best) jobs were:
1. Mathematician;
2. Actuary;
3. Statistician;
4. Biologist; and,
5. Software Engineer.
As jobs go, these aren’t bad. You get to work indoors out of the weather, in offices or laboratories, and none involves grueling physical labor. All require serious mental acuity, and the top three involve the manipulation of numbers (where’s Numeric Life when we need her?).
Not all jobs are quite that good, though. The bottom five (worst) jobs in the survey were:
196. EMT (Emergency Medical Technician);
197. Seaman;
198. Taxi Driver;
199. Dairy Farmer; and,
200. Lumberjack.
In contrast to the “best” jobs, these primarily involve stressful work done outdoors in all sorts of weather, and all involve actual physical danger (though you might argue that dairy farmers have it a bit better than the others).
It could be worse, though. According to The Worst Case Scenario Almanac: History, the worst jobs in medieval England were:
* Leech Collector (walk along riverbeds and collect leeches on your bare legs for later sale to doctors);
* Fuller (treat wool fabric with urine to thicken it);
* Purple Maker (smash mollusks in a vat, add water and ash, and supervise the fermentation, which is said to smell...well...pretty bad); and,
* Arming Squire (keep your knight’s armor clean by polishing it with sand, vinegar, and urine; run into the middle of the battle to replace your knight’s broken armor or weapons).
Moving ahead a few hundred years, here were some of the worst jobs of the 1800’s:
* Chimney Sweep’s Assistant (spend your days jammed in filthy, soot-filled chimneys);
* Mill Scavenger (clean cotton lint and scraps from beneath operating textile machines);
* Pure Collector (gather dog and cat feces from the streets for use by tanners (see "tanner," below));
* Stoker (shovel coal into the roaring fireboxes of steam engines on ships and locomotives); and,
* Tanner (treat animal hides with urine and animal excrement as part of the leather-making process).
Flipping burgers or making all the changes your boss wants to the report you wrote doesn’t seem so bad now, does it?
Have a good day. Cartoon Saturday is coming tomorrow.
Bilbo
Friday, January 09, 2009
Thursday, January 08, 2009
You Knew It Had To Be Coming...So To Speak...
Two of my heroes are comic writer Dave Barry and beloved American commentator Will Rogers. Dave Barry, before reporting on something true-but-utterly-ridiculous, generally said, "I couldn't make this stuff up!" Will Rogers once said, "I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts."
Which brings me to this amazing story that popped up on CNN yesterday: Porn Industry Seeks Federal Bailout. Yes, the porn industry, represented by Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flynt and "Girls Gone Wild" CEO Joe Francis, are seeking a 5 billion dollar federal bailout of the adult entertainment industry. Mr Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people." Mr Flynt, in his own statement, said, "With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."
Have you noticed that while boobs generally come in pairs, some are much more attractive and interesting than others (Rima, Fiona, and Mike, feel free to jump in here)?
It's obvious that Congress won't bail out the porn industry, at least not directly...they'll continue to do it one member and one transaction at a time. But I'd sure like to be in the audience for the hearings if it gets that far. Some of the evidence submitted would probably be exciting, and it would be interesting to see all the elected reprehensives wearing raincoats to the hearing. And can you imagine the collateral the adult entertainment industry could agree to post?
What's all this stuff about "adult entertainment," anyhow? I'm an adult. Age-wise, anyhow. And I get most of my entertainment from books and dancing. I wonder if I can qualify for a bailout? I can buy a lot of books and magazines, dance lessons and shoes for 5 billion dollars.
I'm working on my bailout request. I'll let you know how it comes out.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Which brings me to this amazing story that popped up on CNN yesterday: Porn Industry Seeks Federal Bailout. Yes, the porn industry, represented by Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flynt and "Girls Gone Wild" CEO Joe Francis, are seeking a 5 billion dollar federal bailout of the adult entertainment industry. Mr Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people." Mr Flynt, in his own statement, said, "With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."
Have you noticed that while boobs generally come in pairs, some are much more attractive and interesting than others (Rima, Fiona, and Mike, feel free to jump in here)?
It's obvious that Congress won't bail out the porn industry, at least not directly...they'll continue to do it one member and one transaction at a time. But I'd sure like to be in the audience for the hearings if it gets that far. Some of the evidence submitted would probably be exciting, and it would be interesting to see all the elected reprehensives wearing raincoats to the hearing. And can you imagine the collateral the adult entertainment industry could agree to post?
What's all this stuff about "adult entertainment," anyhow? I'm an adult. Age-wise, anyhow. And I get most of my entertainment from books and dancing. I wonder if I can qualify for a bailout? I can buy a lot of books and magazines, dance lessons and shoes for 5 billion dollars.
I'm working on my bailout request. I'll let you know how it comes out.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Irritating Phrases
Last November, the Telegraph newspaper (from the UK) published an article titled "Oxford Compiles List of Top Ten Irritating Phrases," and I duly filed the link away for future use.
The time has come.
There are phrases that make my teeth vibrate, that are useless, irritating, or otherwise nonsensical. The Telegraph identified many of them, but my #1 All-Time Champion Irritating Phrase is not on their list. I'll share it with you in a minute. First, here are a few of the phrases identified by the Oxford Worthies as "irritating," with the obligatory commentary:
* "At the end of the day." We used to say things like "when it's all said and done" to refer to the conditions existing once some action was completed. I don't know when "at the end of the day" came into use, but I wish we could turn back the clock and strangle it in its crib. I can hear how the late George Carlin would have commented on this stupid phrase: "At the end of the day ... it's NIGHT, for God's sake! Get over it!!"
* "With all due respect." Translation: "You're an utter moron, so let me try to explain this to you again in words with fewer syllables."
* "24/7." This one refers, of course, to actions which take place constantly, and it has a lesser-used relative - "24/7/365" which, of course, cavalierly omits leap years. Perhaps Numeric Life, were she still on line, might have suggested why we needed to reduce it to numbers. Somehow, I just can't hear Amanda complaining that she has to change Aaron's diapers "24/7," even if she has become our new statistician-in-training.
* "At this moment in time." Translation: "Now." Any questions?
* "Fairly unique." If something is "unique" it is, by definition, one of a kind ("being without like or equal" - Websters New Collegiate Dictionary). "Fairly unique" ranks right up there with "slightly pregnant."
* "Have a good one!" Okay, this one's not on the Oxford list, but it still grinds my gears every time I hear it. The automatic (and meaningless) "Have a good day" was bad enough (I used to have a frowny-face button with the message "Don't tell me what kind of day to have!"), but now we're too lazy even to use this empty phrase...now it's just reduced to "have a good one!" One of what? Have a good pork chop? Have a good root canal? Have a good ton of bauxite? You get the idea.
Okay, you've waited long enough - here's my all-time champion irritating phrase:
* "God willing." This one seems usually to be appended to some call for murder or revenge by a wild-eyed, bearded lunatic like Ayman al-Zawahiri, First Deputy Snake of al-Qaeda. You can read an example in this article: Al Qaeda Message Blames Obama, Egypt for Gaza Violence. Oddly enough, Mr Zawahiri fails to give credit to either Hamas or Israel for the horror in Gaza, and fails to realize that Mr Obama is not yet the president. I suppose this happens when you live in the sixth century instead of the 21st, and are more interested in religiously-sanctioned violence than in reconciliation and goodwill. God willing, a bomb of large size and fearsome yield will soon allow Mr Zawahiri to plead his case directly to The Deity...although the telephone connection between heaven and where he'll be is not likely to be a good one.
What are the phrases that irritate you? Let me know and I'll promise not to use them. Too often.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
The time has come.
There are phrases that make my teeth vibrate, that are useless, irritating, or otherwise nonsensical. The Telegraph identified many of them, but my #1 All-Time Champion Irritating Phrase is not on their list. I'll share it with you in a minute. First, here are a few of the phrases identified by the Oxford Worthies as "irritating," with the obligatory commentary:
* "At the end of the day." We used to say things like "when it's all said and done" to refer to the conditions existing once some action was completed. I don't know when "at the end of the day" came into use, but I wish we could turn back the clock and strangle it in its crib. I can hear how the late George Carlin would have commented on this stupid phrase: "At the end of the day ... it's NIGHT, for God's sake! Get over it!!"
* "With all due respect." Translation: "You're an utter moron, so let me try to explain this to you again in words with fewer syllables."
* "24/7." This one refers, of course, to actions which take place constantly, and it has a lesser-used relative - "24/7/365" which, of course, cavalierly omits leap years. Perhaps Numeric Life, were she still on line, might have suggested why we needed to reduce it to numbers. Somehow, I just can't hear Amanda complaining that she has to change Aaron's diapers "24/7," even if she has become our new statistician-in-training.
* "At this moment in time." Translation: "Now." Any questions?
* "Fairly unique." If something is "unique" it is, by definition, one of a kind ("being without like or equal" - Websters New Collegiate Dictionary). "Fairly unique" ranks right up there with "slightly pregnant."
* "Have a good one!" Okay, this one's not on the Oxford list, but it still grinds my gears every time I hear it. The automatic (and meaningless) "Have a good day" was bad enough (I used to have a frowny-face button with the message "Don't tell me what kind of day to have!"), but now we're too lazy even to use this empty phrase...now it's just reduced to "have a good one!" One of what? Have a good pork chop? Have a good root canal? Have a good ton of bauxite? You get the idea.
Okay, you've waited long enough - here's my all-time champion irritating phrase:
* "God willing." This one seems usually to be appended to some call for murder or revenge by a wild-eyed, bearded lunatic like Ayman al-Zawahiri, First Deputy Snake of al-Qaeda. You can read an example in this article: Al Qaeda Message Blames Obama, Egypt for Gaza Violence. Oddly enough, Mr Zawahiri fails to give credit to either Hamas or Israel for the horror in Gaza, and fails to realize that Mr Obama is not yet the president. I suppose this happens when you live in the sixth century instead of the 21st, and are more interested in religiously-sanctioned violence than in reconciliation and goodwill. God willing, a bomb of large size and fearsome yield will soon allow Mr Zawahiri to plead his case directly to The Deity...although the telephone connection between heaven and where he'll be is not likely to be a good one.
What are the phrases that irritate you? Let me know and I'll promise not to use them. Too often.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Boobs of Another Sort
I learned a valuable lesson yesterday: in order to maximize the number of comments left in response to a post, I should write about either breasts or cute deer (14 comments each). I even found this at Jessica's blog Indexed this morning:
And so, Dear Readers, in line with the philosophy that one should reinforce success, I have decided to write this morning about...Senate confirmation of nominees for public office.
No, wait, stay!! It's interesting, I promise!
One of the interesting things about living in the National Capital Region is the intricate political kabuki dance that occurs each time the president nominates a candidate for an office which requires Senate confirmation of the nominee. Because our political system requires that all nominees for high office be of sterling character and, preferably, virgin birth, confirmation hearings provide an extra-large ring in which the Congressional circus can perform. If you want to laugh and cry (at the same time), Senate confirmation hearings are just made for you.
This article by Tom Korologos, who has assisted more than 300 presidential nominees prepare for their confirmation hearings, appeared in yesterday's Washington Post op-ed section: Obama Nominees Take Note. The article is a part tongue-in-cheek, part serious look at preparing for the confirmation process, and this is the key point:
"Remember that most of the hearing will be more about the questioners than about you."
If you've ever suffered through Senate hearings on any topic, you doubtless have noticed that Senators will frequently blather on ad nauseum until you (and the unfortunate witness) have forgotten what the original question was...if, in fact, there ever was a question. Confirmation hearings aren't about the nominee, who is required to sit with bovine placidity, wishing he (or she) were somewhere else, while a bunch of earnest-looking Senators use him (or her) as a dart board on which to score political points against the administration or advance their own agendas. Senators like to hear themselves talk. Vice President-elect Biden, who was recently (and elegantly) described in a recent magazine article as a "hair-plugged windbag," is only one example.
Here's another quote from the article:
"Accept that the hearing will not be fair. The Constitution protects you only to the hearing-room door. You have no rights, there is no provision for "objecting." Hearsay questions are allowed. A U.S. senator can ask any question he or she chooses. So be polite and deferential."
Translation: the only reason for you to be here to provide an excuse for the Senators to thunder down at you from their elevated seats. If you try to point out that a particular question is stupid, unfair, or utterly unrelated to evaluating your qualifications for the post to which you have been nominated, you'll go down in flames. It's not personal...it's just how the confirmation process has turned into a bizarre circus which ensures that the most qualified persons will have no interest in pursuing public service.
This is how we end up with unqualified political hacks who draw large salaries while allowing New Orleans to be destroyed and the economy to swirl down the toilet.
Read the entire article. It's interesting, sobering, and worth your time.
And if you like boobs, you'll understand why we end up with so many of them in high office.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
And so, Dear Readers, in line with the philosophy that one should reinforce success, I have decided to write this morning about...Senate confirmation of nominees for public office.
No, wait, stay!! It's interesting, I promise!
One of the interesting things about living in the National Capital Region is the intricate political kabuki dance that occurs each time the president nominates a candidate for an office which requires Senate confirmation of the nominee. Because our political system requires that all nominees for high office be of sterling character and, preferably, virgin birth, confirmation hearings provide an extra-large ring in which the Congressional circus can perform. If you want to laugh and cry (at the same time), Senate confirmation hearings are just made for you.
This article by Tom Korologos, who has assisted more than 300 presidential nominees prepare for their confirmation hearings, appeared in yesterday's Washington Post op-ed section: Obama Nominees Take Note. The article is a part tongue-in-cheek, part serious look at preparing for the confirmation process, and this is the key point:
"Remember that most of the hearing will be more about the questioners than about you."
If you've ever suffered through Senate hearings on any topic, you doubtless have noticed that Senators will frequently blather on ad nauseum until you (and the unfortunate witness) have forgotten what the original question was...if, in fact, there ever was a question. Confirmation hearings aren't about the nominee, who is required to sit with bovine placidity, wishing he (or she) were somewhere else, while a bunch of earnest-looking Senators use him (or her) as a dart board on which to score political points against the administration or advance their own agendas. Senators like to hear themselves talk. Vice President-elect Biden, who was recently (and elegantly) described in a recent magazine article as a "hair-plugged windbag," is only one example.
Here's another quote from the article:
"Accept that the hearing will not be fair. The Constitution protects you only to the hearing-room door. You have no rights, there is no provision for "objecting." Hearsay questions are allowed. A U.S. senator can ask any question he or she chooses. So be polite and deferential."
Translation: the only reason for you to be here to provide an excuse for the Senators to thunder down at you from their elevated seats. If you try to point out that a particular question is stupid, unfair, or utterly unrelated to evaluating your qualifications for the post to which you have been nominated, you'll go down in flames. It's not personal...it's just how the confirmation process has turned into a bizarre circus which ensures that the most qualified persons will have no interest in pursuing public service.
This is how we end up with unqualified political hacks who draw large salaries while allowing New Orleans to be destroyed and the economy to swirl down the toilet.
Read the entire article. It's interesting, sobering, and worth your time.
And if you like boobs, you'll understand why we end up with so many of them in high office.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Monday, January 05, 2009
Bilbo's All-You-Can-Eat Salad Bar
One of the nice things about living next to a stretch of thickly-wooded county park land is that we have privacy and relative peace and quiet on our little cul-de-sac. On the other hand, we also have the visitors who sneak up from the woods to snack on my garden and our landscaping.
Yesterday afternoon we had two deer in the front yard, brazenly chowing down on our plants right outside my study window. Agnes didn't want me to chase them away ("the deer have to eat, too"), so I shot them with the only thing available...my trusty Canon Digital Rebel XT. The pictures are a bit dark, as I was shooting through a closed window and screen, and I was only able to get pictures of one of the shameless diners, as the other stayed too close to the side of the house for me to get a good shooting angle.
This is the "Yeah, I'm eatin' your yard...sue me!" glare of the average Northern Virginia deer. It's also a good view of the winter coat the animals are all featuring this time of year...
This one, taken from the living room window, puts the snacker in the larger perspective of the front yard...
And if he (she, actually) could have eaten my car, she probably would have...
Both deer eventually wandered over to my neighbor's yard to poach his plants for a while, before retiring back to their hiding places in the woods.
So...
When I'm bitching and complaining about the state of my lawn plants in a few months, these are the guys I'm complaining about.
Venison is looking pretty good right about now.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Yesterday afternoon we had two deer in the front yard, brazenly chowing down on our plants right outside my study window. Agnes didn't want me to chase them away ("the deer have to eat, too"), so I shot them with the only thing available...my trusty Canon Digital Rebel XT. The pictures are a bit dark, as I was shooting through a closed window and screen, and I was only able to get pictures of one of the shameless diners, as the other stayed too close to the side of the house for me to get a good shooting angle.
This is the "Yeah, I'm eatin' your yard...sue me!" glare of the average Northern Virginia deer. It's also a good view of the winter coat the animals are all featuring this time of year...
This one, taken from the living room window, puts the snacker in the larger perspective of the front yard...
And if he (she, actually) could have eaten my car, she probably would have...
Both deer eventually wandered over to my neighbor's yard to poach his plants for a while, before retiring back to their hiding places in the woods.So...
When I'm bitching and complaining about the state of my lawn plants in a few months, these are the guys I'm complaining about.
Venison is looking pretty good right about now.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Making a Clean Breast of Things...So to Speak
Okay, Rima and Fiona and Mike started this, so blame them if you're one of those odd people easily offended by sexual imagery.
Yes, I am going to write about breasts this morning.
Being a normal, healthy American male, I am as obsessed with the female figure as anyone else. The difference is that my obsession is a reasonably moderate and well-controlled one...I don't (usually) stare at the bosoms of young ladies, and neither do I get huffy when a young mother decides to breast-feed her child in public (hey, I learned from my daughter that one can now buy "hooter hiders" to make public breast-feeding less of a traumatic event for those exposed to it). Ladies come equipped with breasts, and men like them. It's been this way since Adam first realized that Eve had fine knockers and Eve went to Victoria's Secret Tree for leaves to cover said knockers, and it's unlikely to change any time soon. For my own part, I depend on beautiful breasts, partially exposed by teasingly low necklines, to encourage me to keep my head up while dancing. Most of the time, anyhow.
Which is all part of my long-winded introduction to this article from Time Magazine: Facebook's War on Nipples.
According to the article, "Facebook has drawn a line in the sand by removing any photos it deems obscene, including those containing a fully exposed breast, which the site defines as 'showing the nipple or areola.' In other words, plunging necklines or string bikinis are fine — just no nips."
You may remember the hysteria which accompanied Janet Jackson's "wardrobe malfunction" on live television some years ago...part of her costume was designed to pull away to expose a ... gasp! ... nipple on television. The horror! Oh, dear God, there couldn't have been enough psychiatrists in the world to deal with the incalculable harm done to the minds of the millions of impressionable children who might have caught a split-second glimpse of Ms Jackson's partially-exposed breast (and a fine breast it was, too, if I may offer the opinion). And think of the damage done to carpets and upholstery everywhere when alert men spilled their chips and beer at the sight.
We're doomed, doomed, I say! When breasts are wantonly exposed, surely the rain of fire and brimstone from an aggrieved deity cannot be far behind. Surely the collapse of the economy and all of our other ills can be traced directly to our willingness to expose female breasts.
Okay, it's time to cash the reality check.
A staple of modern prime-time television programming is violence. You have your CSI, you have your Bones, you have your police and detective shows in which people are routinely stabbed, shot, beaten, burned, tortured, bent, folded, spindled, mutilated, and subjected to many other types of hideous bodily harm. The small screen is awash in violent imagery of wounds, decomposed bodies, rape, murder, and all sorts of other examples of man's inhumanity to man.
And we're worried someone might see a nipple? Or - God forbid - a whole breast, still attached to a live, functioning lady? Oh, the horror! Maybe it's just me, but I tend to prefer the sight of a baby peacefully nursing at a mother's breast to a scene of violence and depravity.
This...
As opposed to this:
I'm weird that way.
Well, other ways, too, but that's a discussion for another day.
If you are one of those people who get hysterical at the sight of an exposed breast, my message to you is: get a life. After all, the life you have is probably a result in large part of a breast your mother exposed to you some years ago. And I don't think you complained about that one.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Yes, I am going to write about breasts this morning.
Being a normal, healthy American male, I am as obsessed with the female figure as anyone else. The difference is that my obsession is a reasonably moderate and well-controlled one...I don't (usually) stare at the bosoms of young ladies, and neither do I get huffy when a young mother decides to breast-feed her child in public (hey, I learned from my daughter that one can now buy "hooter hiders" to make public breast-feeding less of a traumatic event for those exposed to it). Ladies come equipped with breasts, and men like them. It's been this way since Adam first realized that Eve had fine knockers and Eve went to Victoria's Secret Tree for leaves to cover said knockers, and it's unlikely to change any time soon. For my own part, I depend on beautiful breasts, partially exposed by teasingly low necklines, to encourage me to keep my head up while dancing. Most of the time, anyhow.
Which is all part of my long-winded introduction to this article from Time Magazine: Facebook's War on Nipples.
According to the article, "Facebook has drawn a line in the sand by removing any photos it deems obscene, including those containing a fully exposed breast, which the site defines as 'showing the nipple or areola.' In other words, plunging necklines or string bikinis are fine — just no nips."
You may remember the hysteria which accompanied Janet Jackson's "wardrobe malfunction" on live television some years ago...part of her costume was designed to pull away to expose a ... gasp! ... nipple on television. The horror! Oh, dear God, there couldn't have been enough psychiatrists in the world to deal with the incalculable harm done to the minds of the millions of impressionable children who might have caught a split-second glimpse of Ms Jackson's partially-exposed breast (and a fine breast it was, too, if I may offer the opinion). And think of the damage done to carpets and upholstery everywhere when alert men spilled their chips and beer at the sight.
We're doomed, doomed, I say! When breasts are wantonly exposed, surely the rain of fire and brimstone from an aggrieved deity cannot be far behind. Surely the collapse of the economy and all of our other ills can be traced directly to our willingness to expose female breasts.
Okay, it's time to cash the reality check.
A staple of modern prime-time television programming is violence. You have your CSI, you have your Bones, you have your police and detective shows in which people are routinely stabbed, shot, beaten, burned, tortured, bent, folded, spindled, mutilated, and subjected to many other types of hideous bodily harm. The small screen is awash in violent imagery of wounds, decomposed bodies, rape, murder, and all sorts of other examples of man's inhumanity to man.
And we're worried someone might see a nipple? Or - God forbid - a whole breast, still attached to a live, functioning lady? Oh, the horror! Maybe it's just me, but I tend to prefer the sight of a baby peacefully nursing at a mother's breast to a scene of violence and depravity.
This...
As opposed to this:
I'm weird that way.Well, other ways, too, but that's a discussion for another day.
If you are one of those people who get hysterical at the sight of an exposed breast, my message to you is: get a life. After all, the life you have is probably a result in large part of a breast your mother exposed to you some years ago. And I don't think you complained about that one.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Cartoon Saturday
Israel continues to bomb Gaza as Hamas continues to fire rockets at Israel, a rock star's family is planning to auction off his used coffin on e-Bay, actor John Travolta's son has died in the Bahamas, a man suffering from cerebral palsy was accidentally left on a bus overnight in 15-degree temperatures, and there are still 17 days left in the Bush administration.
Thank goodness for Cartoon Saturday!
One of my favorite singers is Nanci Griffith, and one of my favorite Nanci Griffith songs is The Wall of Death, about the ultimate carnival ride. Perhaps she needs to update the lyrics a bit for the latest terrifying ride...
Traditional newspapers are having a rough time from a generation that prefers to get its news in short, information-free bursts from television and the bells-and-whistles-festooned Internet. I thought this recent cartoon says it all...
Perhaps the government regulators who were responsible for overseeing the few economic regulations the administration hadn't gotten rid of yet overlooked some key indicators of the coming disaster...
Earl and I understand each other...
And finally, I wasn't sure whether or not to laugh at this one...which you just know will appear as the subject of a junk lawsuit sometime...
Have a good weekend. When the first full work week of 2009 starts on Monday, you'll need it.
For now, have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Thank goodness for Cartoon Saturday!
One of my favorite singers is Nanci Griffith, and one of my favorite Nanci Griffith songs is The Wall of Death, about the ultimate carnival ride. Perhaps she needs to update the lyrics a bit for the latest terrifying ride...
Traditional newspapers are having a rough time from a generation that prefers to get its news in short, information-free bursts from television and the bells-and-whistles-festooned Internet. I thought this recent cartoon says it all...
Perhaps the government regulators who were responsible for overseeing the few economic regulations the administration hadn't gotten rid of yet overlooked some key indicators of the coming disaster...
Earl and I understand each other...
And finally, I wasn't sure whether or not to laugh at this one...which you just know will appear as the subject of a junk lawsuit sometime...
Have a good weekend. When the first full work week of 2009 starts on Monday, you'll need it.For now, have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Friday, January 02, 2009
Another Taxing Discussion
In the classic Marx Brothers movie Duck Soup, Groucho (as Rufus T. Firefly, the leader of Freedonia) is chairing a meeting of his advisors to deal with Freedonia's wretched economic situation. The Minister of Finance urges him to take up the tax. Groucho says he'd rather take up the carpet. The Finance Minister still insists they must take up the tax. To which Groucho replies, "You're right...we have to take up the tax before we can take up the carpet!"
I worship Groucho Marx.
And we need to take up the tax.
I got into an all-day three-way e-mail discussion earlier this week with two of my friends on the subject of how to stimulate the economy. My friends, both of whom are a bit to the political right of Atilla the Hun, spent the day trying to convince me that the silver bullet that will save the economy is tax cuts. I spent the day strongly disagreeing, and we ended up agreeing to disagree.
As you know if you've been reading this blog for long, I don't like paying taxes any more than you do, but I accept that they're a necessary evil. After all, how does the government raise the money to pay to bail out the greedy bastards who got us into this mess?
To die-hard economic conservatives who believe in supply-side economics, the economy booms when taxes are low because people have more money to spend, while businesses have more money to invest in expansion, production, and hiring. Central to this belief is the so-called Laffer Curve, a bell curve which purports to show that increases in tax rates do not actually increase tax revenue. According to this economic theory, lower tax rates actually increase tax revenue because people are more willing to work when they can keep more of their money from the tax collector's clutches...the higher the rate of taxation, the lower the individual's motivation to work hard and make more, because he'll just end up paying it to the tax man. The top of the Laffer Curve is the point at which the individual taxpayer's willingness to work hard is balanced by the government's need to generate tax revenue. This is what the curve looks like...
Okay, I can see where the Laffer Curve makes sense. But what doesn't make sense to me is how lower tax rates can work across the board as the Conservative Silver Bullet answer to all economic problems.
Here is what I wrote in the e-mail exchange I described above:
“…as of December 5th, the economy this year has lost about 1.9 million jobs. These are people who have no work and are paying no taxes. A tax cut isn't going to do them much good if they have no earnings to tax. While tax cuts may, in your view, 'mean more money for businesses to expand and hire new people,' I think that the expansion and hiring aren't likely to happen until those businesses are sure they will have customers for their products and services. How big a tax cut do you suppose it will take to convince businesses to hire back the 1.9 million people they laid off this year, plus all the new ones entering the work force?
“It may be true that government actually takes in more money when it cuts taxes, although I suspect there may be some creative accounting to make those numbers work in all but the most booming of economic times. Whether it does or not depends on whether the money that businesses and individuals save in reduced taxes is plowed back into the economy. I can tell you in my own case, that we are saving every extra dime we can in an attempt to make up for the massive losses we sustained in the current Wall Street meltdown...that's money that isn't being spent in those stores you expect will be hiring and expanding because of the money I'm supposed to be spending. And I don't think I'm alone in what I'm doing.
“… You are correct in that money collected in taxes is money that is not available for businesses to invest, that the essence of government is to set spending priorities which balance income (taxes) with outgo, and that a line needs to be drawn to bound those priorities. The problem is that we have allowed rigid political viewpoints to limit discussion of and experimentation with potential solutions. Rock-ribbed conservatives believe the government should stay back and let the marketplace police itself...well, we can all see how well that works. Die-hard liberals believe the government has a responsibility to ensure that everyone shares equally in the economic benefits (sounds like Marx's "from each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs," doesn't it?). Each one has his head up his butt. Government shouldn't "dictate," but really needs to regulate the marketplace enough to prevent the sort of disaster we're coping with now ... likewise, government shouldn't be implementing foolish policies which may be socially praiseworthy but are in reality economically ludicrous (mortgage loans to unqualified people, for instance).”
Okay, I've beaten the tax horse long enough. What's your view? How should we stimulate the economy? I accept that lower (or, at least, not higher) taxes should be considered as one part of a larger stimulus package, but beyond that I don't know. What I do know is that throwing money at banks, finance companies, auto makers, and everybody else that's whining for help isn't likely to work in the absence of a coordinated plan that actually puts people to work and prevents the economic shenanigans that wrecked the economy in the first place.
Where do we go in 2009? Inquiring minds want to know.
Because inquiring bodies need to eat.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
I worship Groucho Marx.
And we need to take up the tax.
I got into an all-day three-way e-mail discussion earlier this week with two of my friends on the subject of how to stimulate the economy. My friends, both of whom are a bit to the political right of Atilla the Hun, spent the day trying to convince me that the silver bullet that will save the economy is tax cuts. I spent the day strongly disagreeing, and we ended up agreeing to disagree.
As you know if you've been reading this blog for long, I don't like paying taxes any more than you do, but I accept that they're a necessary evil. After all, how does the government raise the money to pay to bail out the greedy bastards who got us into this mess?
To die-hard economic conservatives who believe in supply-side economics, the economy booms when taxes are low because people have more money to spend, while businesses have more money to invest in expansion, production, and hiring. Central to this belief is the so-called Laffer Curve, a bell curve which purports to show that increases in tax rates do not actually increase tax revenue. According to this economic theory, lower tax rates actually increase tax revenue because people are more willing to work when they can keep more of their money from the tax collector's clutches...the higher the rate of taxation, the lower the individual's motivation to work hard and make more, because he'll just end up paying it to the tax man. The top of the Laffer Curve is the point at which the individual taxpayer's willingness to work hard is balanced by the government's need to generate tax revenue. This is what the curve looks like...
Okay, I can see where the Laffer Curve makes sense. But what doesn't make sense to me is how lower tax rates can work across the board as the Conservative Silver Bullet answer to all economic problems.Here is what I wrote in the e-mail exchange I described above:
“…as of December 5th, the economy this year has lost about 1.9 million jobs. These are people who have no work and are paying no taxes. A tax cut isn't going to do them much good if they have no earnings to tax. While tax cuts may, in your view, 'mean more money for businesses to expand and hire new people,' I think that the expansion and hiring aren't likely to happen until those businesses are sure they will have customers for their products and services. How big a tax cut do you suppose it will take to convince businesses to hire back the 1.9 million people they laid off this year, plus all the new ones entering the work force?
“It may be true that government actually takes in more money when it cuts taxes, although I suspect there may be some creative accounting to make those numbers work in all but the most booming of economic times. Whether it does or not depends on whether the money that businesses and individuals save in reduced taxes is plowed back into the economy. I can tell you in my own case, that we are saving every extra dime we can in an attempt to make up for the massive losses we sustained in the current Wall Street meltdown...that's money that isn't being spent in those stores you expect will be hiring and expanding because of the money I'm supposed to be spending. And I don't think I'm alone in what I'm doing.
“… You are correct in that money collected in taxes is money that is not available for businesses to invest, that the essence of government is to set spending priorities which balance income (taxes) with outgo, and that a line needs to be drawn to bound those priorities. The problem is that we have allowed rigid political viewpoints to limit discussion of and experimentation with potential solutions. Rock-ribbed conservatives believe the government should stay back and let the marketplace police itself...well, we can all see how well that works. Die-hard liberals believe the government has a responsibility to ensure that everyone shares equally in the economic benefits (sounds like Marx's "from each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs," doesn't it?). Each one has his head up his butt. Government shouldn't "dictate," but really needs to regulate the marketplace enough to prevent the sort of disaster we're coping with now ... likewise, government shouldn't be implementing foolish policies which may be socially praiseworthy but are in reality economically ludicrous (mortgage loans to unqualified people, for instance).”
Okay, I've beaten the tax horse long enough. What's your view? How should we stimulate the economy? I accept that lower (or, at least, not higher) taxes should be considered as one part of a larger stimulus package, but beyond that I don't know. What I do know is that throwing money at banks, finance companies, auto makers, and everybody else that's whining for help isn't likely to work in the absence of a coordinated plan that actually puts people to work and prevents the economic shenanigans that wrecked the economy in the first place.
Where do we go in 2009? Inquiring minds want to know.
Because inquiring bodies need to eat.
Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Bilbo Presents the First Rant Collection of 2009
Happy New Year!
Okay, now that we have the pleasantries out of the way, let's look at the first silliness of 2009...
Governor Rod "What Am I Bid For This Seat" Blagojevich has appointed Roland Burris to take the Senate seat vacated by President-elect Obama. Mr Burris appears to be well-qualified to be a senator, particularly because of his ego and his proven ability to plan for the future...CNN reports that Mr Burris has already built his mausoleum, with his resume and accomplishments literally carved in stone. Read all about it here. I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to use this cartoon, but...
From the Department of Get a Life, Dumbass comes this story about atheists filing a lawsuit to keep all mention of God out of President-elect Obama's inauguration ceremony. Dr Michael Newdow, who has filed the same (unsuccessful) lawsuit in 2001 and 2005, claims that "...it's unconstitutional to imply that atheists and others are not as good (as 'real Americans')." Here's what the First Amendment to the Constitution actually says on the subject: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof." I'm no Constitutional scholar, but it sounds to me like the Founders didn't want Congress to try to turn the US into a seventh-century religious paradise like Saudi Arabia...not that all mention of God is by itself a bad thing, or that people have a constitutional right to not feel uncomfortable. 'Nuff said.
From the Department of Chickens and Eggs comes the latest murderous unpleasantness between Israel and Hamas. Israel is bombarding Hamas because it keeps launching rockets at Israel because the Israelis keep killing Hamas militants who keep launching rockets at Israel because the Israelis keep killing Hamas militants who...you get the idea. Which came first, the Hamas chicken or the Israeli egg? I still say my approach to solving the Middle East mess is best: build a wall 200 feet high and 50 feet thick around the entire region, fill it up with sand, and start over.
Amazingly enough - after months of badgering and snide comments in this space, I have finally received a letter from Mike! Sort of. Yesterday, I received an envelope from Mike which contained this article snipped from the St Louis Post-Dispatch: As Time and Newspapers March On, I Relish Real Mail. Oh, well...it's a start.
I hope you all had a safe and enjoyable New Years' Eve and are not reading this through the filter of an alcohol-induced hangover. Agnes and I stayed home last night: I baked a standing rib roast, accompanied by Cauliflower Mornay and potatoes, we dined in style, then spent a relaxing evening in front of the fire watching episodes of Bones on DVDs. The neighbors fired off several hours worth of fireworks, and 2009 showed up on schedule.
I hope it's better than 2008.
Happy New Year! Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Okay, now that we have the pleasantries out of the way, let's look at the first silliness of 2009...
Governor Rod "What Am I Bid For This Seat" Blagojevich has appointed Roland Burris to take the Senate seat vacated by President-elect Obama. Mr Burris appears to be well-qualified to be a senator, particularly because of his ego and his proven ability to plan for the future...CNN reports that Mr Burris has already built his mausoleum, with his resume and accomplishments literally carved in stone. Read all about it here. I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to use this cartoon, but...
From the Department of Get a Life, Dumbass comes this story about atheists filing a lawsuit to keep all mention of God out of President-elect Obama's inauguration ceremony. Dr Michael Newdow, who has filed the same (unsuccessful) lawsuit in 2001 and 2005, claims that "...it's unconstitutional to imply that atheists and others are not as good (as 'real Americans')." Here's what the First Amendment to the Constitution actually says on the subject: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof." I'm no Constitutional scholar, but it sounds to me like the Founders didn't want Congress to try to turn the US into a seventh-century religious paradise like Saudi Arabia...not that all mention of God is by itself a bad thing, or that people have a constitutional right to not feel uncomfortable. 'Nuff said. From the Department of Chickens and Eggs comes the latest murderous unpleasantness between Israel and Hamas. Israel is bombarding Hamas because it keeps launching rockets at Israel because the Israelis keep killing Hamas militants who keep launching rockets at Israel because the Israelis keep killing Hamas militants who...you get the idea. Which came first, the Hamas chicken or the Israeli egg? I still say my approach to solving the Middle East mess is best: build a wall 200 feet high and 50 feet thick around the entire region, fill it up with sand, and start over.
Amazingly enough - after months of badgering and snide comments in this space, I have finally received a letter from Mike! Sort of. Yesterday, I received an envelope from Mike which contained this article snipped from the St Louis Post-Dispatch: As Time and Newspapers March On, I Relish Real Mail. Oh, well...it's a start.
I hope you all had a safe and enjoyable New Years' Eve and are not reading this through the filter of an alcohol-induced hangover. Agnes and I stayed home last night: I baked a standing rib roast, accompanied by Cauliflower Mornay and potatoes, we dined in style, then spent a relaxing evening in front of the fire watching episodes of Bones on DVDs. The neighbors fired off several hours worth of fireworks, and 2009 showed up on schedule.
I hope it's better than 2008.
Happy New Year! Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.
Bilbo
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
2008 - The Year in Books
Last January zero_zero_one, who blogs at Cognitive Blindspot, posted a list of the books he'd read during the previous year. It was a pretty lengthy list, and it got me to thinking about how many books I read in the course of a year...so, being a list-oriented person anyhow, I started a list of books I'd read in 2008. As one way of recapping the year, here is my list of what I read during the past year, along with comments and my favorites (in bold print):
January:
The Cabinet of Curiosities, Douglas Preston & Lincoln Childs - it's brain candy, but it's fun...the adventures of FBI Special Agent Pendergast and his evil brother continue.
The Fall of Berlin, Anthony Beevor - I enjoy reading the history of places I've lived. This is a harrowing account of the final battle for Berlin at the end of World War II. For detailed, yet readable history at the level of those who lived it, it ranks with Cornelius Ryan's The Last Battle, which I read many years ago.
Thunderhead, Douglas Preston & Lincoln Childs - more Preston/Childs brain candy, but a cracking good read about exploration, heroism, and eerie happenings in the most remote corner of the American southwest.
February:
The Day of Battle, Rick Atkinson - gripping history of the brutal struggle for Italy during World War II.
Sword Song, Bernard Cornwell - Uthred continues his struggle to regain his birthright in the England of King Alfred the Great. If you like vivid descriptions of swordplay and the details of grubby life centuries ago, it's for you.
Death in Vienna, Frank Tallis - a great, atmospheric mystery set in Vienna at the end of the 19th century. The writing is elegant and brilliantly captures the sights, sounds, smells and feel of old Vienna, and the cast of characters includes Sigmund Freud.
The Greatest Battle, Andrew Nagorski - a solid, well-written history of the titanic battle between the German and Soviet armies at the gates of Moscow. Be glad you weren't there.
March:
The Berlin Wall: A World Divided, 1961-1989, Frederick Taylor - a little plodding at times, but a very good history of the politics that led to the construction of the ghastly (and now, thankfully, demolished) Berlin Wall...a chunk of which now has pride of place on the shelf in my study. You'll want to buy a picture of Walter Ulbricht just so you can throw darts at it.
Silent in the Sanctuary, Deanna Raybourn - brain candy. A disappointing mystery.
Stalin’s Ghost, Martin Cruz Smith - Arkady Renko, Smith's Moscow detective who first appeared years ago in the brilliant novel Gorky Park, is back on the job. Not a bad story of contemporary Russian crime, but not Smith's best.
A Prisoner of Birth, Jeffrey Archer - it's a knock0ff of The Count of Monte Cristo, but it's a great story of wrongful imprisonment, redemption, and revenge.
April:
Vienna Blood, Frank Tallis - the first of Tallis's stories about crime and psychoanalysis in Vienna (see Death in Vienna, above). His next book in the series, Fatal Lies, comes out in February...I'll be there when they open the boxes.
Compulsion, Jonathan Kellerman - the continuing adventures of consulting psychiatrist Alex Delaware. A good story, but not one of Kellerman's best.
True Enough, Farhad Manjoo - I wrote about this marvelous book in my April 22nd post titled Just True Enough... It's a short, well-written, and very thought provoking look at just what "truth" means in the modern world. This is a must-read.
The Serpent’s Tale, Ariana Franklin - brain candy. 'Nuff said.
May:
The Killing Ground, Jack Higgins - IRA enforcer turned British agent Sean Dillon and his compatriots continue the twilight war against evildoers of all sorts. If you ignore the fact that Dillon is probably by now about 80 years old and the plots are all interchangeable, it's a good book to read in your spare time. Brain candy, but fun.
The Library at Night, Alberto Manguel - if you enjoy books and reading, you'll love this. I wrote about it here back on May 8th. A wonderful book...what more can I say?
Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex, Mary Roach - Ms Roach has written several interesting books on topics ranging from the ongoing lives of cadavers (Stiff) to the investigation of life after death (Spook...see the comments in December, below). Bonk is hysterically funny and tremendously entertaining. I reviewed it in the blog on May 20th.
Days of Atonement, Michael Gregorio - excellent, atmospheric murder mystery set in French-occupied Prussia during the time of the Napoleonic Wars. You'll be glad you didn't live then.
June:
The Forgery of Venus, Michael Gruber - I love Michael Gruber's writing, but this one left me a bit disappointed. The idea is good, I just found myself unable to keep up with the twists of the plot.
The Age of American Unreason, Susan Jacoby - brilliant. Read it.
The Steel Wave, Jeff Shaara - a novel of World War II in Europe. Jeff Shaara is the son of Michael Shaara, who wrote the brilliant Civil War novel The Killer Angels. He's not a bad author, but he's no match for his father.
Vienna, 1814, David King - a very interesting, very readable history of the Congress of Vienna, which tried to resurrect Europe after the initial defeat and exile of Napoleon. How can you go wrong with a cast of characters that includes Talleyrand, Metternich, Tsar Alexander, and Beethoven? Strongly recommended.
Escape, Robert K. Tannenbaum - the latest installment of the ongoing adventures of Butch Karp, the incorruptible and indestructible New York District Attorney, and his bizarre collection of family and friends. Brain candy, but fun.
Skeletons at the Feast, Chris Bohjalian - the harrowing story of a group of German women and children fleeing from the advancing Soviet army in the closing months of World War II, and the man who becomes their unlikely protector. Brilliantly written and plotted. Read this one.
Water for Elephants, Sara Gruen - a marvelous novel set in a traveling circus during the Depression. Wonderful, well-developed characters (including Rosie the elephant), and a twist ending I never saw coming. Another must-read.
The Broken Window, Jeffery Deaver - Lincoln Rhyme, the quadraplegic detective, comes through again. You'll never want to go online again after reading this story of identity theft and Internet-enabled criminality.
July:
Odd Hours, Dean Koontz - the continuing adventures of Odd Thomas. An okay read, but a little on the ho-hum side for my taste.
The Critique of Criminal Reason, Michael Gregorio - philosopher Immanuel Kant as consulting detective. First book in the two-book series that continued with Day of Atonement (reviewed above). A good, atmospheric read.
The Monster of Florence, Douglas Preston - Preston gets himself declared persona non grata in Italy as he investigates the tale of the serial killer in Florence known as The Monster (who also appeared in Thomas Harris's book Hannibal). Interesting if you like true crime stories, but not a must-read.
The Driver’s Seat, Muriel Spark - I read this short novel because of a short review on the Head Butler website. A bizarre, twisted tale worth reading.
Sepulchre, Kate Mosse - more brain candy, but a good tale that bounces back and forth in time to reveal the dark secret in a family's history, and its connection with an eerie old sepulchre in the forest. Read it in a dark room during a thunderstorm.
The Man with the Iron Heart, Harry Turtledove - nobody writes alternative history like Harry Turtledove. In this brilliant, fast-paced story, he looks at what might have happened if the Nazis had planned an Iraq-style insurgency to bedevil the Allies after the defeat of Germany in World War II. If you enjoy "what-if?" stories, read this one - they don't come much better.
Killing Rommel, Stephen Pressfield - I first read Stephen Pressfield in his wonderful novel Gates of Fire, about the Spartans' stand against the vast Persian army at Thermopylae. In Killing Rommel, he moves his skills forward to describe the British Army's attempts to kill the Desert Fox in the North African desert. A brilliant tale of men at war in terrible conditions.
Franklin and Lucy, Joseph Piscopo - a very good study of Franklin Roosevelt, his wife Eleanor, and Lucy Rutherford, the woman he always loved but could never have. An interesting look at one of our greatest presidents and the relationships he maintained even under the pressures of the most terrible war in our history.
August:
A Voyage Long and Strange, Tony Horwitz - a readable and very interesting look at the period of American history that's blank to most of us: the time between Columbus's landing in 1492 and the Pilgrims' landing in 1620. There was a lot of exploring and fighting going on, and Mr Horwitz describes it all very well.
Executive Privilege, Phillip Margolin - Margolin writes good, workmanlike thrillers, but has a gift for utterly unbelieveable plot twists. This one's no different. Brain candy.
September:
The God Delusion, Richard Dawkins - whether you believe in God or not, this is an interesting look at how and why we believe on the basis of faith alone. He's a bit too dismissive of those who don't share his beliefs, but it's a good book to read for the questions it raises.
Rough Justice, Jack Higgins - the indestructable Sean Dillon returns yet again. Brain candy, but you'll love the villain's ugly demise.
Fractured, Karin Slaughter - whenever I finish reading Ms Slaughter's books, I want to wash my hands. Many times. Good writing, interesting plots, but no one quite plumbs the swamps of moral depravity like she does (except, perhaps, Andrew Vachss with his character Burke - see Terminal below).
City of Thieves, David Benioff - didn't make much of an impression on me...I can't remember anything about it, which ought to tell you something.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Vol I and Vol II, Alan Moore & Kevin O’Neill - these were the first graphic novels I'd read, and I was pleasantly surprised. If you suffered through the awful film of the same name, you might be inclined to pass these up...but don't. The concept is superb, and the two stories - one inserting the League into the classic H.G. Wells story The War of the Worlds; the other having the League fight the famous villain Fu Manchu - are well-plotted and illustrated. Not must-reads, but fun if you like the idea of a graphic novel.
Devil Bones, Kathy Reichs - forensic anthropologist Temperence Brennan, star of the TV show Bones, takes the stage. I liked the TV show better.
The Spies of Warsaw, Alan Furst - nobody, but nobody, captures the atmosphere of World War II Europe like Alan Furst. This is a great story of espionage, loyalty, and betrayal.
The War Within, Bob Woodward - the Iraq war as fought between the White House, the Pentagon, Congress, and ... oh, yes ... Iraq. Try to sort out the competing agendas of those who allowed themselves to be interviewed for this book.
October:
The Black Tower, Louis Bayard - another moody, atmospheric mystery set in Revolutionary France. Not bad, but not as good as I'd hoped.
The Gargoyle, Andrew Davidson - it's hard to describe this story about a horribly burned and disfigured man and the woman who has loved him...for centuries. It's a great story of love, loss, and redemption.
Terminal, Andrew Vachss - like Karen Slaughter, Vachss plumbs the very deepest depths of human nature for plots and characters that will make your skin crawl. It's a good story, but you'll want to take a shower after reading it.
A Most Wanted Man, John Le Carre - I may be the only person who thought this story was grossly overrated, but I can't help it - it was grossly overrated. And in its depiction of professional intelligence officers as amoral bastards, it did a disservice to people who do a hard job in an ugly world we'd rather not admit exists. An okay read, but far from LeCarre's best.
By the Sword, F. Paul Wilson - the latest adventure of Repairman Jack, a one-man combination of The A Team, McGyver, The Equalizer, and the Impossible Missions Force, trying to rid the world of bad guys while caught up in a fast-approaching apocalypse. Fun, but brain candy.
November:
No Simple Victory: World War II in Europe, 1939-1945, Norman Davies - a good summary of the war in Europe, persuasively making the case that it was the Soviet Union who won the fight against Nazi Germany...for all the heroism and hype, D-Day was a sideshow to the titanic struggle in the East.
Bones, Jonathan Kellerman - more Alex Delaware. More of the same. Not a yawner, but far from an edge-of-the-seat thriller. Brain candy.
The Groucho Letters: Letters From and To Groucho Marx - if you want to laugh loud and long, enjoy this collection of letters from and to one of the most genuinely funny men ever to wield a pen. I could read this book over and over, and laugh anew each time.
The 7th Victim, Alan Jacobson - yep, more brain candy. Who dreams up these convoluted and unbelievable plots, anyhow?
December:
Spook, Mary Roach - not as good as Bonk or Stiff, but interesting and written in Ms Roach's incomparable, witty style. Is there life after death? If I can read more of her work there, I hope so.
The Road, Colman McCarthy - my daughter recommended this book, and gave me a copy for my birthday to make sure I'd read it. It's the story of a father and son walking The Road through a horrifying, post-apocalyptic America peopled with wolves, cannibals, lunatics, and the occasional good person. Very depressing. Read Stephen King's The Stand for a different (and in some ways, better) riff on the same theme.
World Without End, Ken Follett - a wonderful historical novel of the 14th-century England of lords, serfs, peasants, bishops, nuns, outlaws, and the Black Plague. Long and complex, but readable and full of characters you'll either love or hate. I'm now reading the book that came before this one - The Pillars of the Earth - which seems to be just as good.
Just After Sunset, Stephen King - a collection of short stories from the king of horror stories. When he's on his mark, no one writes good descriptive prose like Stephen King...but no one can overwrite like he can, either. What he needs is an editor who can grab him by the lapels and smack him around until he cuts each manuscript by about a third...what's left will be superb.
Well, that was the year in books. What were your favorites? Did you read any of these and have a different take on it than I did? Let me know.
Tomorrow will be a new year which, hopefully, will be better than this one. But before we get to tomorrow, we have to survive tonight - if you are celebrating, do it safely. Don't drink and drive. I need you all back here in one piece tomorrow morning...or afternoon, depending on how hard and late you party.
Happy New Year! Have a good day. More thoughts next year.
Bilbo
January:
The Cabinet of Curiosities, Douglas Preston & Lincoln Childs - it's brain candy, but it's fun...the adventures of FBI Special Agent Pendergast and his evil brother continue.
The Fall of Berlin, Anthony Beevor - I enjoy reading the history of places I've lived. This is a harrowing account of the final battle for Berlin at the end of World War II. For detailed, yet readable history at the level of those who lived it, it ranks with Cornelius Ryan's The Last Battle, which I read many years ago.
Thunderhead, Douglas Preston & Lincoln Childs - more Preston/Childs brain candy, but a cracking good read about exploration, heroism, and eerie happenings in the most remote corner of the American southwest.
February:
The Day of Battle, Rick Atkinson - gripping history of the brutal struggle for Italy during World War II.
Sword Song, Bernard Cornwell - Uthred continues his struggle to regain his birthright in the England of King Alfred the Great. If you like vivid descriptions of swordplay and the details of grubby life centuries ago, it's for you.
Death in Vienna, Frank Tallis - a great, atmospheric mystery set in Vienna at the end of the 19th century. The writing is elegant and brilliantly captures the sights, sounds, smells and feel of old Vienna, and the cast of characters includes Sigmund Freud.
The Greatest Battle, Andrew Nagorski - a solid, well-written history of the titanic battle between the German and Soviet armies at the gates of Moscow. Be glad you weren't there.
March:
The Berlin Wall: A World Divided, 1961-1989, Frederick Taylor - a little plodding at times, but a very good history of the politics that led to the construction of the ghastly (and now, thankfully, demolished) Berlin Wall...a chunk of which now has pride of place on the shelf in my study. You'll want to buy a picture of Walter Ulbricht just so you can throw darts at it.
Silent in the Sanctuary, Deanna Raybourn - brain candy. A disappointing mystery.
Stalin’s Ghost, Martin Cruz Smith - Arkady Renko, Smith's Moscow detective who first appeared years ago in the brilliant novel Gorky Park, is back on the job. Not a bad story of contemporary Russian crime, but not Smith's best.
A Prisoner of Birth, Jeffrey Archer - it's a knock0ff of The Count of Monte Cristo, but it's a great story of wrongful imprisonment, redemption, and revenge.
April:
Vienna Blood, Frank Tallis - the first of Tallis's stories about crime and psychoanalysis in Vienna (see Death in Vienna, above). His next book in the series, Fatal Lies, comes out in February...I'll be there when they open the boxes.
Compulsion, Jonathan Kellerman - the continuing adventures of consulting psychiatrist Alex Delaware. A good story, but not one of Kellerman's best.
True Enough, Farhad Manjoo - I wrote about this marvelous book in my April 22nd post titled Just True Enough... It's a short, well-written, and very thought provoking look at just what "truth" means in the modern world. This is a must-read.
The Serpent’s Tale, Ariana Franklin - brain candy. 'Nuff said.
May:
The Killing Ground, Jack Higgins - IRA enforcer turned British agent Sean Dillon and his compatriots continue the twilight war against evildoers of all sorts. If you ignore the fact that Dillon is probably by now about 80 years old and the plots are all interchangeable, it's a good book to read in your spare time. Brain candy, but fun.
The Library at Night, Alberto Manguel - if you enjoy books and reading, you'll love this. I wrote about it here back on May 8th. A wonderful book...what more can I say?
Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex, Mary Roach - Ms Roach has written several interesting books on topics ranging from the ongoing lives of cadavers (Stiff) to the investigation of life after death (Spook...see the comments in December, below). Bonk is hysterically funny and tremendously entertaining. I reviewed it in the blog on May 20th.
Days of Atonement, Michael Gregorio - excellent, atmospheric murder mystery set in French-occupied Prussia during the time of the Napoleonic Wars. You'll be glad you didn't live then.
June:
The Forgery of Venus, Michael Gruber - I love Michael Gruber's writing, but this one left me a bit disappointed. The idea is good, I just found myself unable to keep up with the twists of the plot.
The Age of American Unreason, Susan Jacoby - brilliant. Read it.
The Steel Wave, Jeff Shaara - a novel of World War II in Europe. Jeff Shaara is the son of Michael Shaara, who wrote the brilliant Civil War novel The Killer Angels. He's not a bad author, but he's no match for his father.
Vienna, 1814, David King - a very interesting, very readable history of the Congress of Vienna, which tried to resurrect Europe after the initial defeat and exile of Napoleon. How can you go wrong with a cast of characters that includes Talleyrand, Metternich, Tsar Alexander, and Beethoven? Strongly recommended.
Escape, Robert K. Tannenbaum - the latest installment of the ongoing adventures of Butch Karp, the incorruptible and indestructible New York District Attorney, and his bizarre collection of family and friends. Brain candy, but fun.
Skeletons at the Feast, Chris Bohjalian - the harrowing story of a group of German women and children fleeing from the advancing Soviet army in the closing months of World War II, and the man who becomes their unlikely protector. Brilliantly written and plotted. Read this one.
Water for Elephants, Sara Gruen - a marvelous novel set in a traveling circus during the Depression. Wonderful, well-developed characters (including Rosie the elephant), and a twist ending I never saw coming. Another must-read.
The Broken Window, Jeffery Deaver - Lincoln Rhyme, the quadraplegic detective, comes through again. You'll never want to go online again after reading this story of identity theft and Internet-enabled criminality.
July:
Odd Hours, Dean Koontz - the continuing adventures of Odd Thomas. An okay read, but a little on the ho-hum side for my taste.
The Critique of Criminal Reason, Michael Gregorio - philosopher Immanuel Kant as consulting detective. First book in the two-book series that continued with Day of Atonement (reviewed above). A good, atmospheric read.
The Monster of Florence, Douglas Preston - Preston gets himself declared persona non grata in Italy as he investigates the tale of the serial killer in Florence known as The Monster (who also appeared in Thomas Harris's book Hannibal). Interesting if you like true crime stories, but not a must-read.
The Driver’s Seat, Muriel Spark - I read this short novel because of a short review on the Head Butler website. A bizarre, twisted tale worth reading.
Sepulchre, Kate Mosse - more brain candy, but a good tale that bounces back and forth in time to reveal the dark secret in a family's history, and its connection with an eerie old sepulchre in the forest. Read it in a dark room during a thunderstorm.
The Man with the Iron Heart, Harry Turtledove - nobody writes alternative history like Harry Turtledove. In this brilliant, fast-paced story, he looks at what might have happened if the Nazis had planned an Iraq-style insurgency to bedevil the Allies after the defeat of Germany in World War II. If you enjoy "what-if?" stories, read this one - they don't come much better.
Killing Rommel, Stephen Pressfield - I first read Stephen Pressfield in his wonderful novel Gates of Fire, about the Spartans' stand against the vast Persian army at Thermopylae. In Killing Rommel, he moves his skills forward to describe the British Army's attempts to kill the Desert Fox in the North African desert. A brilliant tale of men at war in terrible conditions.
Franklin and Lucy, Joseph Piscopo - a very good study of Franklin Roosevelt, his wife Eleanor, and Lucy Rutherford, the woman he always loved but could never have. An interesting look at one of our greatest presidents and the relationships he maintained even under the pressures of the most terrible war in our history.
August:
A Voyage Long and Strange, Tony Horwitz - a readable and very interesting look at the period of American history that's blank to most of us: the time between Columbus's landing in 1492 and the Pilgrims' landing in 1620. There was a lot of exploring and fighting going on, and Mr Horwitz describes it all very well.
Executive Privilege, Phillip Margolin - Margolin writes good, workmanlike thrillers, but has a gift for utterly unbelieveable plot twists. This one's no different. Brain candy.
September:
The God Delusion, Richard Dawkins - whether you believe in God or not, this is an interesting look at how and why we believe on the basis of faith alone. He's a bit too dismissive of those who don't share his beliefs, but it's a good book to read for the questions it raises.
Rough Justice, Jack Higgins - the indestructable Sean Dillon returns yet again. Brain candy, but you'll love the villain's ugly demise.
Fractured, Karin Slaughter - whenever I finish reading Ms Slaughter's books, I want to wash my hands. Many times. Good writing, interesting plots, but no one quite plumbs the swamps of moral depravity like she does (except, perhaps, Andrew Vachss with his character Burke - see Terminal below).
City of Thieves, David Benioff - didn't make much of an impression on me...I can't remember anything about it, which ought to tell you something.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Vol I and Vol II, Alan Moore & Kevin O’Neill - these were the first graphic novels I'd read, and I was pleasantly surprised. If you suffered through the awful film of the same name, you might be inclined to pass these up...but don't. The concept is superb, and the two stories - one inserting the League into the classic H.G. Wells story The War of the Worlds; the other having the League fight the famous villain Fu Manchu - are well-plotted and illustrated. Not must-reads, but fun if you like the idea of a graphic novel.
Devil Bones, Kathy Reichs - forensic anthropologist Temperence Brennan, star of the TV show Bones, takes the stage. I liked the TV show better.
The Spies of Warsaw, Alan Furst - nobody, but nobody, captures the atmosphere of World War II Europe like Alan Furst. This is a great story of espionage, loyalty, and betrayal.
The War Within, Bob Woodward - the Iraq war as fought between the White House, the Pentagon, Congress, and ... oh, yes ... Iraq. Try to sort out the competing agendas of those who allowed themselves to be interviewed for this book.
October:
The Black Tower, Louis Bayard - another moody, atmospheric mystery set in Revolutionary France. Not bad, but not as good as I'd hoped.
The Gargoyle, Andrew Davidson - it's hard to describe this story about a horribly burned and disfigured man and the woman who has loved him...for centuries. It's a great story of love, loss, and redemption.
Terminal, Andrew Vachss - like Karen Slaughter, Vachss plumbs the very deepest depths of human nature for plots and characters that will make your skin crawl. It's a good story, but you'll want to take a shower after reading it.
A Most Wanted Man, John Le Carre - I may be the only person who thought this story was grossly overrated, but I can't help it - it was grossly overrated. And in its depiction of professional intelligence officers as amoral bastards, it did a disservice to people who do a hard job in an ugly world we'd rather not admit exists. An okay read, but far from LeCarre's best.
By the Sword, F. Paul Wilson - the latest adventure of Repairman Jack, a one-man combination of The A Team, McGyver, The Equalizer, and the Impossible Missions Force, trying to rid the world of bad guys while caught up in a fast-approaching apocalypse. Fun, but brain candy.
November:
No Simple Victory: World War II in Europe, 1939-1945, Norman Davies - a good summary of the war in Europe, persuasively making the case that it was the Soviet Union who won the fight against Nazi Germany...for all the heroism and hype, D-Day was a sideshow to the titanic struggle in the East.
Bones, Jonathan Kellerman - more Alex Delaware. More of the same. Not a yawner, but far from an edge-of-the-seat thriller. Brain candy.
The Groucho Letters: Letters From and To Groucho Marx - if you want to laugh loud and long, enjoy this collection of letters from and to one of the most genuinely funny men ever to wield a pen. I could read this book over and over, and laugh anew each time.
The 7th Victim, Alan Jacobson - yep, more brain candy. Who dreams up these convoluted and unbelievable plots, anyhow?
December:
Spook, Mary Roach - not as good as Bonk or Stiff, but interesting and written in Ms Roach's incomparable, witty style. Is there life after death? If I can read more of her work there, I hope so.
The Road, Colman McCarthy - my daughter recommended this book, and gave me a copy for my birthday to make sure I'd read it. It's the story of a father and son walking The Road through a horrifying, post-apocalyptic America peopled with wolves, cannibals, lunatics, and the occasional good person. Very depressing. Read Stephen King's The Stand for a different (and in some ways, better) riff on the same theme.
World Without End, Ken Follett - a wonderful historical novel of the 14th-century England of lords, serfs, peasants, bishops, nuns, outlaws, and the Black Plague. Long and complex, but readable and full of characters you'll either love or hate. I'm now reading the book that came before this one - The Pillars of the Earth - which seems to be just as good.
Just After Sunset, Stephen King - a collection of short stories from the king of horror stories. When he's on his mark, no one writes good descriptive prose like Stephen King...but no one can overwrite like he can, either. What he needs is an editor who can grab him by the lapels and smack him around until he cuts each manuscript by about a third...what's left will be superb.
Well, that was the year in books. What were your favorites? Did you read any of these and have a different take on it than I did? Let me know.
Tomorrow will be a new year which, hopefully, will be better than this one. But before we get to tomorrow, we have to survive tonight - if you are celebrating, do it safely. Don't drink and drive. I need you all back here in one piece tomorrow morning...or afternoon, depending on how hard and late you party.
Happy New Year! Have a good day. More thoughts next year.
Bilbo
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