Monday, January 25, 2016

Musical Monday


Last Friday we celebrated the birthday of soul singer Sam Cooke, whose beautiful voice and smooth, effortless delivery gave us a long playlist of beloved songs, including this one - "Wonderful World" - which has always been one of my favorites.



Sam Cooke was killed in 1964, depriving us of one of the finest singers of his - or any other - time. Nowadays, we're stuck with the Justin Biebers and other lesser talents, which is too bad for new generations of music lovers.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Sunday, January 24, 2016

Poetry Sunday


If ever there was a poem appropriate to the day, it's this one ... I think I'll be shoveling for days ...

Shoveling Snow
by Kirsten Dierking

If day after day I was caught inside
this muffle and hush

I would notice how birches
move with a lovely hum of spirits,

how falling snow is a privacy
warm as the space for sleeping,

how radiant snow is a dream
like leaving behind the body

and rising into that luminous place
where sometimes you meet

the people you've lost. How
silver branches scrawl their names

in tangled script against the white.
How the curves and cheekbones

of all my loved ones appear
in the polished marble of drifts.


Have a good day, and if you're shoveling snow, do it carefully. More thoughts tomorrow when Musical Monday warms us up with some vintage Sam Cooke. Be here!

Bilbo

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Cartoon Saturday


Want snow? Let me know, I'll send you all you want.

The east coast continues to suffer blizzard conditions from a monster snowstorm that is pounding the region and leaving two feet or more of snow driven into huge drifts by high winds; the city of Flint, Michigan (where I have relatives) continues to grapple with a public health disaster caused by the decision to switch the city's water supply to the contaminated water of the Flint River; self-styled defenders of the Constitution continue their occupation of a remote bird sanctuary in Oregon, and are quickly exhausting the patience of local residents; in the town of Renton, Washington, a young woman was shot and injured by a man fumbling with his handgun in a crowded theater; and an inquiry in the United Kingdom has concluded that Russian President Vladimir Putin probably approved an operation by Russian agents to kill former Russian spy Alexander Litvinenko in 2006.

This past Wednesday, January 20th, was Penguin Awareness Day ... and so, to make sure you remain aware of penguins, this week's cartoons are dedicated to everyone's favorite formally-attired birds.

I wonder how she knows ...


Who, indeed?


Small talk with the date ...


It's probably more fun than herding cats ...


Penguin implants? ...


CSI: Antarctica ...


Oops ...


Well, that's true enough ...


You had to see this one coming ...





Given the weather conditions outside my study window, penguins seem to be a good topic for today. And here's an extra bonus: your guide to the most important varieties of penguins ...


Have a good day. Stay warm and dry, and be here tomorrow for Poetry Sunday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Friday, January 22, 2016

Great Moments in Editing


Yes, Dear Readers, while we sit here in NoVa and wait for Mother Nature to bury us in snow, let's pass the time with another collection of Great Moments in Editing, shall we? ...

Well, that's one way to address the problem of religious intolerance ...


On second thought, I think I'll have the kale ...


I'm not too sure about that body sliming ...


Do you suppose the books come with the chair? ...


Somehow, I'm not surprised ...


There have got to be easier ways of making a living ...


When I was younger, I was sometimes hard up for dates ... but never quite this hard up ...


It's always good to diversity your clientele ...


At the intersection of bad grammar and inadequate grasp of mathematics ...


I certainly hope we don't have conditions quite this bad this weekend ...


And there you have it: our second offering of Great Moments in Editing for January. I hope you enjoyed them!

We are getting ready for our "historic" blizzard that's scheduled to move into the local area between 3 and 5 o'clock this afternoon and leave us with as much as 24 inches of snow. If you are living in a snow-deprived area, please let me know and I'll be glad to send you as much as you like. No charge.

Have a good day. If you're out driving in this mess, be careful ... I need you to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday!

More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Thursday, January 21, 2016

The Culture of Anger


As you all know, Dear Readers, the state of political discourse in this country is wretched. There’s no gentility any more. There’s no rational give-and-take, no willingness to trade ideas and to compromise, no desire ... or ability ... to concede that one’s political opponents might just have a point.

Looking at this mess as a linguist and semanticist*, I think that one of the significant stokers of political ill will is the language our media uses to report on political issues. Consider this:

The main theme in political writing and reporting today is anger. Someone is always angry about something. The conservative base is enraged over the latest thing the government did, especially if it views Congressional Republicans as being complicit in it. Voting blocs are described as livid. Members of Congress are furious or outraged over the latest thing that President Obama did/said/thought, and many Republican voters loathe him and resent pretty much anything he does. Voters are “so mad they can’t see – or think – straight.” Members of both parties compare each other to Hitler and the Nazis**.


And it’s not just the verbs and adjectives of anger that contribute to a sense of violent disagreement. Consider the number of idiomatic expressions we have in American English that are based on the language of weapons – particularly the firearms we worship:

Something unlikely to succeed may be a long shot. A random comment may be a shot in the dark that’s fired for effect. We construct our speeches using bullet points and we aim high to ensure we hit the target. We had a TV politics show called Firing Line, on which guests fire off short answers to complex questions. We often fire a shot across the bow as a warning or to get attention. Tense situations are explosive.

Linguist Deborah Tannen wrote about this topic in her 1998 book The Argument Culture, in which she described "a pervasive, warlike atmosphere that makes us approach anything we need to accomplish as a fight between two opposing sides, (urging) us to regard the world and the people in it with an adversarial frame of mind (and assuming) that opposition is the best way to get anything done."

You can see Tannen's Argument Culture play out in the troll-to-troll bellowing in the comments section of any news article or opinion piece, and in the I'm-right-you-hate-America blather of media shouting heads.

Are you convinced that the Other Guy is either a fascist or a commiepinkoratbastard, with nothing to say that's worth listening to? Welcome to the Argument Culture and the language of anger.


And good luck with the election.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* One who studies semantics, defined as “the branch of linguistics and logic concerned with meaning.”

** One of the more blatantly stupid comparisons.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

I've Found a Cause I Can Support


Every celebrity has a cause they support. I may not be a celebrity, but I've finally found a cause I could get behind if I ever got famous ...


I assure you I'm not being rasher anything, ha, ha.


Have a good day. If you live in the DC/NoVa/Maryland area, you might want to go to the store and see if they have any milk, bread, or lunch meat in advance of our expected Big Snowstorm. While you're there you can say hello to your 2.5 million friends who are all doing the same thing.

More thoughts tomorrow, in advance of the blizzard.

Bilbo

Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Paraprosdokians


A paraprosdokian is a literary device in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected, resulting in humor or surprise.

I expect that paraprosdokian is not a word you'll be likely to use very often (unless you're a retired English teacher like Kathy, from whom I first learned the word), but you may from time to time use one in conversation. Here, courtesy of my brother Mark, are a few examples:

Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, Notify:" I wrote "A doctor."

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a mechanic.

You're never too old to learn something stupid*.

I'm supposed to respect my elders, but its getting harder and harder for me to find one now.

Got any other good paraprosdokians? Leave a comment, and show the rest of us how erudite you are!

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* And use it in a political argument.

Monday, January 18, 2016

Musical Monday


The biggest Powerball jackpot in history - more than a billion dollars - was divided by three lucky souls this past week. Or maybe they're not so lucky, because they'll be swamped with relatives they never knew they had, their phones will ring off the wall with calls from every charity on earth, and their junk e-mail boxes will explode. I've thought a lot about what I'd do if I won the Lottery, but it's all academic since I seldom buy a ticket.

Today, in honor of the Powerball winners, let's call up this catchy 1976 tune from the Swedish group Abba ...



Well, they're right ... it's a rich man's world.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Sunday, January 17, 2016

Poetry Sunday


A few years ago, back when there was money to spend on such things, I did a great deal of traveling on business. Nowadays, with budgets tighter than a g-string on a hippopotamus, the only business traveling I do is from home to the office. Not that I'm complaining, mind you ... too much travel can be a pain in the neck. The best part of business travel for me was almost always the part about coming home ... a feeling memorably captured in this poem by Kenneth Rexroth ...

Coming 
by Kenneth Rexroth 

You are driving to the airport
Along the glittering highway
Through the warm night,
Humming to yourself.
The yellow rose buds that stood
On the commode faded and fell
Two days ago. Last night the
Petals dropped from the tulips
On the dresser. The signs of
Your presence are leaving the
House one by one. Being without
You was almost more than I
Could bear. Now the work is squared
Away. All the arrangements
Have been made. All the delays
Are past and I am thirty
Thousand feet in the air over
A dark lustrous sea, under
A low half moon that makes the wings
Gleam like fish under water -
Rushing south four hundred miles
Down the California coast
To your curving lips and your
Ivory thighs.

Ah, yes ... curving lips and ivory thighs. What was it we were talking about, again?

Have a good day. If you travel, do it safely and enjoy the homecoming. See you back here again tomorrow for Musical Monday.

Bilbo

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Cartoon Saturday


News flash ... Ted Cruz and Donald Trump have broken up! Film at eleven. In other news ...

Ten Navy sailors were taken prisoner and later released by Iran after their boats strayed into Iranian waters; Alex, the first Atlantic hurricane to form in January since 1938, rose in the eastern Atlantic and threatened the Azores; twelve Marines are missing near Hawaii after two helicopters collided during a night training mission; from the Sauce for the Gander department, Ted Cruz dealt with allegations that he is not a "natural born citizen," and is therefore ineligible to be president*; and today begins Florida's "Python Challenge," in which hunters try to capture or kill as many as possible of the giant Burmese pythons infesting the Florida Everglades**.

This week, in honor of the brigands of Wall Street, we feature cartoons about pirates ...

Everybody's gotta start somewhere ...


When pirates turn to an acting career ...


It's one way to keep the workers' morale up ...


Methinks he doesn't go anywhere quickly ...


Sometimes I'm not sure the benefits are worth it ...


It took me a minute to get this one ... but it was worth the wait ...


An understandable mistake ...


Occupational hazard ...


Oops ...


This just can't end well ...


And that's it for this week's edition of Cartoon Saturday. I hope you it helped to raise your spirits after a grueling week of bad news. I plan to spend a relaxing weekend cleaning out the crawlspace above the garage so that I can get all the Christmas decorations put away until next year. More fun than anyone should be allowed to have without paying taxes on it.

Have a good day. Come back tomorrow for Poetry Sunday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* Anyone who listens to Mr Cruz for any length of time will quickly realize that while he may indeed be a citizen, the man just ain't natural.

** Because invasive snakes are being intensively hunted during the Python Challenge, presidential campaigning has been suspended for the duration of the event for safety reasons.