Friday, December 10, 2010

Why I'm Glad I'm Not President

We've all played the "if I were king" game, where we see something really stupid and imagine how we'd make it right if we were the king (or president, or emperor, or whatever). I often shake my head and think about how nice it would be to point an accusing finger at some deserving ass clown and shout "off with his head!"

Sadly, most of us will never be a king, president, or emperor, and so all we can do is start blogs and rant about the things that ought not to be.

Actually, I'm glad I'm not the president. There are a lot of reasons, but this is the biggest one: You can't say what you really think.

As president, I couldn't say that ...

Congress is a bunch of inept, useless ninnies more interested in political dogma and scoring cheap hits on the opposition than in actually fixing the economy, meaningfully reforming health care, protecting us against bad guys, and giving us a tax code that looks like somebody designed it on purpose.

North Korea is a political, social, and economic basket case that - despite its professed philosophy of juche (or "self-sufficiency") - is an utterly untrustworthy kleptocracy run by a pampered ruling class, willing to let its people starve, propped up by a swollen military paid for by criminality and extortion, and unwilling to keep any agreement. That it should just be paved over and used as a parking lot for Seoul.

That China is a nation that can be admired for its achievements, but has paid for those achievements with with political repression at home, economic manipulation abroad, and shameless browbeating of other nations that dare to point out that the emperor has no clothes. That it is ruled by a government so concerned for its position and privileges and so afraid of its own people that it can go to ridiculously bombastic and self-destructive lengths to prevent one of it's billions of citizens from accepting ... a peace prize. And that protects North Korea from the consequences of its deadly antics.

That Republicans are a bunch of dogmatic buffoons puffed up with self-righteous arrogance and fantasy-based economic policies that benefit business and the wealthy by strangling the middle class.

That Democrats, who claim to represent the average American, are a blundering cluster of incompetent clowns unable to come up with coherent policies that can turn their dreams into reality.

No, I don't think I could be president. Because I'd spend all day biting my tongue to keep from saying the things I'd want to say.

But I do wish I could - if only for one day - shout "off with their heads!" when it's needed. Which is often.

Have a good day. Demand more from your elected reprehensives ... but expect less. More thoughts tomorrow.


P.S. - it's still really cold.


John said...

I recently discovered that it isn't always safe to say what you want to say...even on your own blog.

If you ever have that "off with their heads" day, can I submit a few names and watch them roll?

Bandit said...


Raquel's World said...

It's funny that you went on that lil rant and then threw in "it's still really cold".

Mike said...

The generals just think they run the Army when it's really the sergeants.

KathyA said...

I think the world needs to hear what you have to say! Think the POST will publish your blog?

PS You forgot to add that Kim Jong-il is a nut!

Bilbo said...

John - I hear you. Send me your list and I'll add it to mine...

Bandit - Yep, too.

Roc - Well, it IS really cold. Sue me!

Mike - in the Air Force, the generals think they run things, the sergeants make people do things, and the contractors get things done.

Kathy - the Post ignores me, although I have been picked up a few times by the DC BlogLog. And as for Kim Jong-il being a nut, I didn't say it because I didn't want to make the nuts feel bad.