Tuesday, August 07, 2012

Bilbo's Plan for the President's Landslide Reelection in November

First of all, let me say that I haven't yet decided who I'll vote for in the Presidential election. I will just say that I need to be convinced that the opponent needs to convince me ... based on real plans I can evaluate, not platitudes aimed at an unthinking base ... that I should vote for him instead of the incumbent.

I'm still waiting for those plans and policy specifics, though, and I have a feeling I'll die of old age before I see them.

But be that as it may, many pundits have predicted that this year's election will be a squeaker, with the difference between Governor Romney and President Obama within the margin of error of whatever poll you choose to believe.

But I ... Bilbo, the clever but as yet unrecognized political operative ... have solved the problem for President Obama. I believe I have a plan that will guarantee him a towering landslide of historic proportions that will completely bury any opponent the GOP can field.

And it's so simple!

Consider this: the GOP is viscerally, completely, and utterly opposed to anything President Obama (or any Democrat) suggests. If a Democrat says the sky is blue, the GOP will line up in a solid wall to insist that it is absolutely, positively pink. If the President manages to pass, say, a health-care reform law, Republicans will hysterically oppose every aspect of it on principle ... even those portions which were originally developed and proposed by conservatives*.

So, here's my devious, sure-fire plan to ensure the President's reelection ...

On November 5th, the day before the election, President Obama calls a press conference at which he, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi unanimously endorse Mitt Romney (or whoever the GOP nominee turns out to be) for President.

Republicans, spring-loaded to reject anything suggested, proposed, or supported by any Democrat, will immediately vote for ... whoever is opposing the person who has been endorsed by the much-despised Democrats**.

The President will be reelected in an enormous landslide.

Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I will admit that I voted for President Obama in 2008, largely because I was so sick of Bush era Republican policies***. I will also admit to a certain amount of buyer's remorse caused by President Obama's lack of inspiring and clear-eyed leadership****. But I will also point out that Governor Romney, the presumptive GOP nominee, has yet to explain any specific policies he would follow, budget cuts he would make, or plans he would propose that I can evaluate to see if he'd do any better job than the sitting President. This, of course, makes no difference to those rock-solid conservatives who foam at the mouth at the very thought of a second Obama presidency ... but who don't seem to appreciate that their guy is a would-be emperor without policy clothes.

So, Democrats, here's your way to win - endorse the GOP candidate! If nothing else, the level of cognitive dissonance you'll cause in the opposition will be very entertaining.

Have a good day. Make sure you ask the people who want your vote the hard questions ... and don't let them get away with not answering them. You deserve better.

More thoughts tomorrow.


* Amazingly enough, even Faux News agrees on the conservative pedigree of the individual mandate!

** That would be President Obama, in case you weren't paying attention.

*** It appears that those who castigate President Obama for the size of the federal deficit have conveniently forgotten that it was President Bush who cut taxes at the same time he decided to fight two wars on credit. Has Mr Obama had a hand in running up the deficit? You bet. Are hypocritical, historically-blinkered Republicans blameless? Not in the least.

**** Although it can be tough to lead when you have a well-organized opposition fighting you every step of the way.

You may not agree with the President's policies and actions ... but at least you know what they are.


The Mistress of the Dark said...

One would think that Romney Hood's speaking would be enough to guarantee a landslide. Because if his trip to the UK is any indicator...his diplomacy skills are more than a bit lacking.

Bob said...

My friend, it would appear that those blinkered Bush supporters aren't the only ones who conveniently forgot some aspects of that administration...like the opposition fighting everything Bush wanted to do, just as the GOP fights everything Obama wants to do. Merely on principle, of course. Fighting stimulus bills, then supporting and passing them when it's their guy asking for them. Passing tax cuts, then arguing against them, then pushing for them when it's their guy making the case. They're all a bunch of opportunistic hypocrites, and both sides deserve an EQUAL satirical thrashing.

Mike said...

It's going to be a long day. The phone didn't stop ringing yesterday with robo calls and I'm sure it will be the same today.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

That seems to be as good a reelection strategy, other than promising free cable access as an entitlement. Or maybe this move would benefit a third party. Where are the bull Moose people?

Big Sky Heidi said...

I think it would help the Republicans' cause if they had a concrete platform of things they are supporting. There's little in the way of solutions being offered.

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

But if Romney et al endorse Obama, would the Democrats vote for Romney? Bad weed?

Ken K said...

Bill, I'm confused. You say that "the opponent needs to convince me ... based on real plans I can evaluate, not platitudes aimed at an unthinking base." But then you say you voted for Obama. I can only conclude that you've changed your criteria.

Bilbo said...

Andrea - we don't have any politicians (including Mr Obama) who are world-class diplomats, but Governor Romney does appear to have some extra issues.

Bob - I like to think that I have given a satirical wire-brushing to both parties...it's just that the present-day GOP makes it a lot easier, IMHO.

Mike - We have the same problem. And the worst part is that being on the National Do-Not-Call Register protects you not a bit, because political calls are exempt from controls.

Angelique - We don't have the Bull Moose Party any more ... just the bull.

Heidi - That's been my point all along. If the GOP has better ideas, they should lay it out for us to evaluate. See my response to Ken below.

Elvis - This could happen, but I don't think most mainstream Democrats are as reflexive as the Republicans who have veered hard to the far right.

Ken - Not so! Yes, I voted for Mr Obama in 2008...but as I said, mainly because the GOP had pissed me off so badly. And I did say I have some buyer's remorse. And I'm not necessarily ready to vote for him again this year. But my point still stands: by virtue of the fact that he's in office now, Mr Obama has to actually put forward plans, budgets, and policies for everyone to see and for Congress to vote on (when the members are not busy accusing each other of doing nothing, rather than doing their jobs). He's the president. Mr Romney has yet to put forward any specific plans, policy options, or budgetary recommendations that we can evaluate, and he's been getting an undeserved free ride from a credulous electorate.