Thursday, April 11, 2013

Our First Ass Clown of the Month for 2013!


I must apologize to you, Dear Readers, as I have been derelict in my duty to nominate Ass Clowns of the Month over the last quarter. It hasn't been for lack of well-qualified candidates, it's just that I've been stymied by my inability to select a single individual to receive the prestigious award.

But no longer! You've waited long enough - the time has come to announce our first Ass Clown of the Month for 2013!


From the vast, teeming swamp of strong competition rises not only our first Ass Clown of the Month for this year, but our first second-time winner*:

Senator Mitch McConnell (R, Kentucky)


Senator McConnell's previous award was based on his ringing defense of the need to protect big campaign donors from the terrifying requirement to - gasp! - be publicly named, because such exposure would infringe on their Constitutional right to free speech and expose them to deadly danger from those on the political left.

The horror!

This month's award recognizes Senator McConnell's approach to maintaining his Senate seat not through the brilliance of his ideas and his solomonic wisdom, but through his ruthless, take-no-prisoners use of opposition research ... which is a gussied-up, politically correct term for what we once called ad hominem attacks. 

Now, it is certainly true that Senator McConnell is not the only bottom-dwelling politician of either party to rely on personal attacks on his opponents rather than sober discussion of the issues, but he's the most recent one to have it publicly exposed. You have probably seen some discussion in the news about the Senator's outrage over the tape of his campaign staff meeting's discussion of how to smear a potential opposition candidate - actress Ashley Judd.


So horrified is Senator McConnell about the exposure of his campaign's shameless use of opposition research that he has requested the FBI look into who "bugged" his campaign headquarters, exposing his likening of this phase of the upcoming reelection campaign, in which potential opponents are attacked, to a game of "Whack-a-Mole."

Would Ms Judd be a credible candidate to challenge Mr McConnell, and could she be an effective senator? There is certainly a precedent for celebrities to develop into towering political figures - consider the careers of Ronald Reagan, Sonny Bono, and Ilona Staller.

But I guess we'll never know how effective Ms Judd might have been, at least not any time soon, thanks largely to the opposition research conducted by our Ass Clown of the Month - Senator Mitch McConnell.

Congratulations, Senator, on your second - well-deserved - award!

Have a good day. Come back the day after tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday.

Bilbo

* He was our Ass Clown of the Month for June of 2012. Read about it here.

4 comments:

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mike said...

McConnell always seems to have that deer in the headlights look on his face.

Big Sky Heidi said...

Ashley Judd is a resident of Nashville and now and then puts on Kentucky Wildcat sports gear to pose for cheesecake.

KathyA said...

I think I love you!