The New Official Unit of Stupidity

As you know, Dear Readers, I have for years maintained the National Stupidity Condition Index (the DUMBCON). It was last revised and reset in January of this year, and I've seen no reason to make any further changes ... if anything, I could add more levels, but when we're already at DUMBCON Minus Four, there just doesn't seem to be much point*.

There is, however, a new approach to the measurement of stupidity that I think deserves some consideration. 

First, the background: during a routine Congressional hearing earlier this week, Texas Representative Louis Gohmert, already recognized as one of the dimmer bulbs in the already dim GOP chandelier, asked representatives of the Forest Service and Bureau of Land Management (BLM):

"Is there anything that the National Forest Service or BLM can do to change the course of the moon's orbit or the Earth's orbit around the sun? ... Obviously, they would have profound effects on our climate."

This led to the predictable head-shaking and commentary on the intellectual capacity of some members of Congress, but one of the best comments I found was in a tweet by someone with the magnificent Twitter handle of Covfefe J. McBigly III Esq, who suggested that the unit used to measure stupidity be known as the Gohmert, abbreviated ghm.

I think this is an idea with real merit that addresses a serious deficit in our ability to establish a practical measurement of stupidity. The DUMBCON, of course, is a useful measurement of overall national-level stupidity, and my biweekly Ass Clown Awards highlight specific individuals whose ass clownery deserves special mention, but neither provides an immediately useful measurement for routine acts of lunacy. The only drawback I can see at this point is that good arguments can be made for other possible units, such as the Taylor-Greene (t-g) or the Giuliani (gi), but I think I'll stick with Mr McBigly's suggestion.

Therefore, I plan to use the Gohmert as my preferred unit of stupidity, and will devote some time in the next few weeks to developing an appropriate scale for its application**, which I will publish when it's done. If you have any suggestions for how to structure the scale, the Gohmert equivalents of various things in the news, or a nifty symbol that might be used in lieu of ghm, leave a comment.

Don't thank me, it's all part of the service. 

Have a good day, and avoid anyone with a provisional Gohmert Index of more than 5.

More thoughts tomorrow, when we feature the latest batch of Great Moments in Editing and Signage. See you then.

Bilbo

* It's kind of like having a huge nuclear arsenal ... after you've already launched the first few missiles, the next wave just makes the rubble bounce higher.

** I'm leaning toward something like the Scoville Scale, which measures the heat of peppers in "scoville units," but am still considering all options.