Thursday, October 16, 2008

I Didn't Watch the Debate. Sue Me.

Yes, that's right. I didn't watch the make-or-break final debate. I came home from work, kicked back, fixed dinner (see the recipe at the end of this post), and went to bed at 9:15. As a result, this morning I feel much better and more rested than I would have if I'd sat and raged at the TV.

No more rants about the economy and venal bankers this morning. I need to rebuild my head of steam first. Instead, I have another ya-ha culled from my collection. You may have seen this before, but it's still funny - here are some new, updated metric measurement equivalents:

1 million microphones = 1 megaphone
1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
365.25 days = 1 Unicycle
500 millinaries = 1 seminary
2000 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds
10 cards = 1 decacards
1/2 lavatory = 1 demijohn
2.71828 grams of turd = 1 natural log
1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton
1000 grams of wet socks = 1 Liter Hosen
1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
2000 British Troops in Ireland = 2 kilohenry
453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
3.14159 dates with an Italian girl = 1 Pizanno
1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
1 trillion grams of brown marijuana = 1 Terracotta pot
1 million billion picolos = 1 gigolo
10 rations = 1 decoration
100 rations = 1 C-ration
10 millipedes = 1 centipede
3 1/3 tridents = 1 decadent
10 monologues = 5 dialogues
5 dialogues = 1 decalogue
2 monograms = 1 diagram
8 nickels = 2 paradigms
2 wharves = 1 paradox

And here's the recipe for last night's dinner - you'll be able to hear your arteries slamming shut from blocks away, but it's soooooo good...and soooooo easy...

Eggs in Mustard Cream Sauce with Capers and Parsley
Serves 4

8 eggs
2 tbsps Dijon mustard
2 tbsps butter
2 tbsps flour
2 tbsps small capers
Fresh-squeezed lemon juice
2 egg yolks
1 cup heavy cream
1 cup vegetable broth
Salt and Pepper
Finely-chopped parsley

1. Hard-boil the eggs and set them aside.

2. Melt the butter in a saucepan; stir in the flour and stir until smooth and golden brown. Add the vegetable broth and bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 5 minutes. Add the cream and stir to combine.

3. Remove the sauce from the heat. Blend the egg yolks with some of the warm sauce, the mustard, and the lemon juice, then stir the mixture into the sauce.

4. Stir the capers and parsley into the sauce and season with salt and pepper to taste.

5. Shell the eggs and cut each one in half. Arrange four halves on each plate, spoon the sauce over, and serve.

You'll thank me.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.



John said...

I'm sure you didn't miss a thing.

Amanda said...

Finally, I'm in a place where I can try out one of your recipes.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

I wish I didn't watch the debate..however the thought of capers is adding to that blerghy feeling I have right now :(

Mike said...

100 rations = 1 C-ration

Reality reverses this one.
100 C-rations = 1 ration

JesseTheCat said...

Ha, dont feel guilty about not watching the debate,here we have such a rotten group of politicians I wouldnt have watched any debatesd either.I must say,sounds like you spent your time much more productively,lol.I would try this recipe,I really would.But I have one problem...I have NO idea what capers are,lol :)

I really dont!Are they some kind of seafood,like mussels?? By the way, this was so funny,especially 1000 grams of wet socks = 1 Liter Hosen :)))

Bilbo said...

John - from reading the news coverage, I think you're right!

Amanda - if you try it, let me know what you think.

Andrea - I don't quite know what a "blerghy" feeling is, but I think I can guess.

Mike - ummm...I think it would make more sense if it was spelled out, but I'll go with my way, since it's my blog, nyah, nyah.

Jesse - capers are little green berries packed in brine that have a sour/salty taste. They're often used in sauces and served with smoked fish. They're not everybody's cup of tea (see Andrea's comment), but I love them as a garnish.

Melissa B. said...

Wow...sounds like you had a much more relaxing, restful evening than I did. Need to stop hyperventilating about politics!

Mike said...

I'm back. The debate. I had it on but was more listening off and on rather than watching. One thing I picked up on is that McCain was constantly baiting Obama. Giving Obama opening lines where he could have jumped all over McCain. But he never took the bait.

fiona said...

Oh goody, I'm taking recipe notes.
"Bilbo Child"