Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Highly Specialized Headgear


When I was growing up in the 50's and 60's, men still wore hats. Nowadays, not so much, except on special occasions. There are lots of different kinds of hats. There's the bowler* ...


The boater ...


And the top hat ...


And there are specialized sorts of hats, like the military shako ...


And the kepi ...


And the German Pickelhaube** ...


And the more modern versions of the military helmet, like this one ...


And there are the really specialized hats, like the diving helmet ...


And the beer hat ...


But there's also a fairly new sort of headgear that has gained great popularity, particularly in Congress and the echo chambers of the extreme media ... the asshat***.


The man in the photograph is a professional asshat. Do not try this at home.

Have a good day. Wear normal hats. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* You may remember the evil henchman Oddjob in the James Bond film "Goldfinger," whose weapon of  choice was a bowler with a razor-sharp brim that he threw like a frisbee.

** Yes, I own one. It's way cool.

*** The Urban Dictionary defines an asshat as, "One whose head is so far up their rear end it could pass for a hat; used to describe a person who is stubborn, cruel, or otherwise unpleasant to be around." 

5 comments:

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Guys should go back to wearing boaters. Bilbo, you must look really cool in the picklehaube; it would definitely stand out at the mall!

Other than the universal baseball hat, hats are pretty passé. I wonder why?

At least you won't ever see me in a pillbox hat!

Grand Crapaud said...

We have too many asshats nowadays. A poor choice of hats. Unless they also wear the picklehaube at the same time.

Anemone said...

I could go for a man wearing a boater. They look so stylish, so retro, like Gene Kelly in Dancing in the Rain.

Mike said...

I dare you to wear your pickelhaube to the mall. How long do think it would take you to get shot by a cop saying you had a dangerous weapon?

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

A top hat would fit in very well in sophisticated Florence, Alabama,