Monday, September 28, 2015

Truth in Advertising Slogans

A few days ago I looked at possible slogans for various college majors. Today we have something else I found online and took the opportunity to steal and gussy up ... advertising slogans for various products and services that are actually truthful ...

Ben and Jerry's: "Eat Away Your Feelings."

YouTube: "Don't read the comments!"

Victoria's Secret: "Lowering women's self-esteem since 1977."

Adobe Acrobat: "Would you like to update?"

Yahoo Mail: "Really, we only want your cell phone number in case you forget your password. Really."

Google: "Just try using another search engine."

LinkedIn: "Connect with people for absolutely no reason."

Men's Health: "Every issue promises perfect abs."

Yellow Pages: "Here; you throw this away."

ChapStick: "You'll lose it before it's empty."

Frosted Flakes: "They're ... okay."

iTunes: "I have not read the 45 pages of Terms and Conditions."

Netflix: "Spend more time searching than actually watching."

Harley Davidson: "We're here for your midlife crisis."

Gillette: "We'll just keep adding more blades."

Ikea: "We include extra parts just to mess with your head!"

Hummer: "Firmly plant your carbon footprint."

Urban Outfitters: "Pay good money to look homeless."

Old Spice: "Smell like Granddad."

Hallmark Cards: "When you care enough to give something mass-produced by a corporation."

I Can't Believe It's Not Butter: "I Can Believe It's Not Butter."

Bounty: "Bachelor Plates by the Roll."

The Republican Party: "If you're not with us, you're a gun-hating commiepinkoratbastard who hates America."

The Democratic Party: "Don't worry about how much it costs ... everything will work out."

Both Parties ...

Any other suggestions? Leave a comment.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.



Grand Crapaud said...

Great slogans!
Fox News=for people very credulous who like hot blondes.

Mike said...

Ted Drewes - You'll be compelled to come back.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Hanes - To look like a boy.

Women's Health - Look like you could kick his ass.

The New York Times - We'll tell you what you should think.

PBS - We'll schedule something popular when we have a pledge drive.

Victoria's Secret - We dare you to carry our shopping bags!

A fine post! Excellent!

allenwoodhaven said...

This was a fun post!

Budweiser: The King of Beers if you live in a very small kingdom without a real brewery.

Duckbutt said...

You tapped them all!