Friday, June 18, 2010

Guest Post

Hi! My name is Nessa. You don’t know me, but I’m the dog who lives here with Bilbo and Agnes. I think Bilbo has mentioned me before, but I’m not sure that he’d tell you the whole truth, so while he’s busy packing for his trip, I decided to try my hand at this blogging thing he’s always talking about. It doesn’t seem so tough, except that this darned keyboard isn’t made for paws. You’ll have to excuse any typos.

Well, all things considered, being a dog in this house is a pretty good deal. The food dish is always full, there’s plenty of water, lots of treats, and lots of comfortable spaces to lie where it’s either warm or cool, depending on the season. I even have a special place way back under Bilbo’s desk where I can hide when there’s thunder and lightning outside. You should see his face when he has to get me untangled from all the cables and things under there!

I’m getting my humans pretty well trained, but it's taking some effort. I can usually get Mom to give me what I want by using the old Chocolate Lab Mournful Eyes trick, but it doesn’t work so well with Bilbo. With him, I have to use the trick on Mom until she gets him to do what I want. It doesn’t work all the time, but I’m still perfecting the technique. And Bilbo is pretty well trained to take me for walks and throw balls and Frisbees for me. The only problem is that he isn’t always very accurate, and we waste valuable playing time while he tries to get the Frisbee out of the tree.

They think they’re training me, and I let them think so. But Bilbo is hung up on this thing about making me stop and sit before we cross a street. What’s up with that? HE doesn’t have to sit his bare backside on the hot cement! And what’s this thing about the flashlight at night when we go for walks? I try hard to find dark, hidden places to poop, and he has to use that stupid light so everybody can see what I’ve done…and then, of course, I want to chase the light.

Well, it may be a dog’s life, but a dog’s life with these humans isn’t all that bad. I’ll try to come back another time and tell you some more stories, but I have to get off the computer now, before he comes back. He doesn’t know I can do this…but I can trust you to keep my secret, right?

Now, how do I clean all this drool off the keyboard…?

Have a good day. Bilbo will have more of his weird human thoughts later.

‘Til then, woof.


P.S. - Smart dog, eh? Agnes and I are headed to Ohio for our granddaughter's dance recital this weekend, so I may not be able to post again until we get back on Sunday. Don't give up. We'll be back.



The Mistress of the Dark said...

What a face!

Enjoy your trip, are you taking Nessa with you?

Mike said...

Nessa, you're a good looking dog. I like dogs that look like dogs.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Good to hear things straight from someone who knows!