Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Senior Shortcuts

Last Monday in this space I groused about the proliferation of letters, numbers, and combinations of the two as shortcuts for what we used to call "speech" and "thought." I suppose that, as a linguist, I should be excited about the emergence of a new form of communication, but I just can't get too excited about communicating in shortcuts.

Nevertheless, as people like Mike, John, and I view the onrushing advent of geezerhood, I can see that there's something to be said for those shortcuts. After all, if your short-term memory is shot and you can't concentrate on things for very long, there's an advantage in the ability to send short, yet meaningful messages. And - as luck would have it - my old friend Devin yesterday sent me a list of texting abbreviations for senior citizens. Just in time, too! Here's his list:

BTW - Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
DWI - Driving While Incontinent
FWB - Friend With Betablockers
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
FYI - For Your Indigestion
GOML - Get Off My Lawn
GTG - Gotta Groan
IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
JK - Just Kvetching
LOL - Living On Lipitor
LWO - Lawrence Welk's On
OMG - Ouch, My Groin!
ROFL - CGU - Rolling On The Floor Laughing - Can't Get Up
RULKM - Are You Leaving Kids Money?
SUS - Speak Up, Sonny
TGIF - Thank Goodness It's Four (Four O'Clock - Early Bird Special)
WIWYA - When I Was Your Age
WTB - Where's the Bathroom?
WTF - What's Today's Fish?
YYY - Yadda, yadda, yadda

Don't thank me ... it's all part of my ongoing efforts to make life easier and more entertaining for you.

What was I talking about, again?

Have a good day. If you haven't bought my Christmas gift yet, there's still time!

More thoughts tomorrow.



Amanda said...

LOL! These are too too TOO funny!!!

John said...

GOML...the hallmark of geezerhood!

Raquel's World said...

Love- LOL and GOML

Bandit said...

There is a similar list going around here and Mike has it. And, thanks for not putting me on your geezerhood list

KathyA said...


Mike said...

The list Bandit sent me similar. I ALMOST posted it last night. Great minds were almost thinking alike.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

So true as well!