Wednesday, November 23, 2011

And the Award Goes To ...

Yes, Dear Readers, it's time once again for ol' Uncle Bilbo to present the richly-deserved Ass Clown of the Week Award!

But wait! This time, it's special, for two reasons!

First, today, we present an award covering not just a week, but an entire month, the level of recognized ass-clownery being so stupendous as to deserve dishonor over a longer period of time. And second, we have a tie for worst first place, and so recognize not one, but two dishonorees.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the Ass Clown of the Month Award is presented jointly to the Joint Select Committee on Deficit Reduction (the so-called "supercommittee") and to Republican gadfly and loose cannon par excellence Newt Gingrich.

We first cite the members of the "supercommittee," for wasting the nation's time and treasure while accomplishing absolutely nothing, making our so-called government the laughingstock of the world, and imperiling our children's and grandchildren's future.

The self-serving and ludicrous closing statement (sent out by the committee's co-chairs by e-mail and as a post on the committee's website, because they were too ashamed to face the people and admit their failure) says it all:

"After months of hard work and intense deliberations, we have come to the conclusion today that it will not be possible to make any bipartisan agreement available to the public before the committee’s deadline ... Despite our inability to bridge the committee's significant differences, we end this process united in our belief that the nation's fiscal crisis must be addressed and that we cannot leave it for the next generation to solve. We remain hopeful that Congress can build on this committee’s work and can find a way to tackle this issue in a way that works for the American people and our economy."

If there was any "hard work" or "intense deliberations" involved, I didn't see it. And if these ridiculous, ideologically fossilized and morally bankrupt finger-pointing blowhards left any work "that Congress can build on," I didn't see that, either. If ever the Ass Clown of the Month Award was deserved, it is now.

And because the ass-clownery just never ends, especially in an election year, a second award is presented to Newt Gingrich ...

for his personification of the "compassionate conservatism" of today's Republican Party. Specifically, Mr Gingrich is cited for his recent assertion that child labor laws are "truly stupid," and his belief that children's work ethic could be enhanced and money saved by replacing expensive unionized school janitors with after-school student labor. Who needs to waste all that time on school work, anyhow? ... the current crop of Republican presidential wannabees clearly demonstrates that education is unnecessary if you are sufficiently ideologically rigid.

And so, Dear Readers, I give you the joint dishonorees for the month of November. Tomorrow may be our beloved holiday of Thanksgiving, but I find little to give thanks for as I look at these ridiculous ass clowns.

I'd go on, but I'm so angry I'd just splutter on the screen.

Demand more from your elected reprehensives, but expect less ... as Jerry Reed once famously remarked, "He who expected nothin' ain't gonna be deceived!"

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.



Duckbutt said...

Good choices! They're Olympic-class ass clowns!

Mike said...

I can't beleive the things coming out of Newts' mouth these days. Talk about pandering to the extreme right.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

The Not-So-Super-Committee: good and logical choice. Idlers!

Newt is on another planet if he thinks that kids will do a credible amount of janitorial work!