Friday, April 10, 2015

The Right Cheek Ass Clown Award for April, 2015

Tempus is fugiting right along and we have come to that time of the month when it’s time to announce

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown Award for April, 2015

It’s never easy to select just one winner from among the braying throngs of suitable candidates, and so sometimes we have to do multiple or group awards. And so it is this month, as with the usual flatulent blare of trumpets we present the Right-Cheek Ass Clown Award to

Really, Really Creative
North Korean Textbook Authors

Yes, Dear Readers, it must be difficult to live in a country in which history is revised on the fly and the willingness to deify a hereditary dictator is all that stands between you and a comfy room in a state-sponsored labor camp. Nevertheless, this week the authors of a textbook for the 2015 school year on “Kim Jong Un's Revolutionary Activities” set the bar for hyperbolic exaggeration to a new height when their new textbook claimed that:

"At the age of 9, Kim Jong Un raced the chief executive of a foreign yacht company, who was visiting North Korea at the time."

The book went on to note that Kim heroically won the race despite his age and, in addition, was able to drive a car by the age of three.

These are the same people who previously noted that Kim’s father, Kim Jong Il, bowled a perfect score of 300 the first time he tried his hand at bowling, and shot a 38 under par with five holes-in-one the first time he played golf.

For their ability to generate laughable revisionist history in the service of their leader, the professional prevaricators who write North Korean textbooks are awarded the Right Cheek Ass Clown Award for April, 2015. This month, the award also includes a year’s supply of Botox to help them keep straight faces.

Have a good day. Come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. More thoughts then.



eViL pOp TaRt said...

Perhaps they should also be awarded a bucket of water to help put out their flaming pants!

Apparent being an unconvincing liar is okay.

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

Their fulsome praise can be a real hoot!

Linda Kay said...

It's hard to imagine that any sane person could read this and not just roll their eyes, right? And how could any publisher allow this garbage in print?

Anemone said...

Surely the writers were writing this garbage tongue-in-cheek? No, not that one!

Mike said...

I lol'd when I read these things. One of the late night shows should hire these guys as comedy writers.

allenwoodhaven said...

An interesting choice. I hadn't heard about this. I would nominate, for future consideration, Gov. Sam Brownback, and his ilk, for their restrictions on welfare benefit spending. The poor shouldn't be demonized and these people are doing just that.

Banana Oil said...

Were they competing in a bullshit contest?