Thursday, February 05, 2009

The Attack of the Tax and Other Gripes

Last evening I went to the local H&R Block office for my annual date with Pat, the nice lady who takes the folder full of W2's, 1099's, 1088's, 911's and other mysterious numbered forms and turns them into a document which shows how much I have to pay in taxes to make up for the people who don't think they have to pay their own. Not that I was mentioning Tom Daschle, you understand. This year was a bit of a wash: the refund I will get from the Infernal Revenue Service almost exactly balances out the amount I have to pay to the Commonwealth of Virginia. I will actually come out about $50 ahead once everything is done.

In Spanish (help me out here, Twinkie) I think they call this La Crocka de Caca.

You all know by now that I don't mind paying taxes. I am, after all, a citizen of this great nation, and there are certain responsibilities that come along with the attendant privileges. What I do mind is when other people don't pay their taxes. Or worse, when other people don't think they need to pay their taxes. I'm not rich enough to hire battalions of tax accountants to find loopholes in which to hide my income, or squadrons of lawyers to protect me from the consequences if I don't pay what I owe. Nor am I a state government that can get out of its obligations by issuing IOUs (are you listening, California?).

That $50 I'll eventually get back will let me take Agnes out for the nice lunch I won't be able to afford once I retire and try to live on what's left of my 401k.


Moving on to another topic guaranteed to raise one's blood pressure...terrible mothers.

You will have, of course, heard of Nadya Suleman, the woman who, after fertility treatments (!) has given birth to octuplets. Ms Suleman is single, unemployed, lives with her mother and already has six children -- including twins -- between 2 and 7 years of age. The octuplets were born prematurely and are in intensive care in the hospital, at huge expense to ... someone other than the mother. And she has hired publicists "to handle the hundreds of media inquiries from around the world." Who do you suppose is paying for the publicists? Do they double as nurses for this woman's 14 children?

Your tax dollars at work.

Another terrible mother in the news: a middle-aged Iraqi woman allegedly responsible for recruiting more than 80 female suicide bombers and being involved in at least 28 terrorist operations. She calls herself Umm-al-Moumineen, or "the mother of the believers."

When I think of good mothers, I think of my daughter, my daughter-in-law, and Amanda. I don't think of psychopathic murderers like Umm-al-Moumineen or morons like Nadya Suleman.

We live in a crazy world.

Tomorrow, I promise a more cheerful post. Today, I'm angry and just need to get these things off my chest.

Have a good day. Pay your taxes. More thoughts tomorrow.



John said...

Oh yeah, least I still have that to look forward to! Thanks for sharing.

wv: hypersau--must be way beyond sau!?

Amanda said...

Hey wow! Thanks for putting me in the good mothers category Bilbo :)

Taxes. Hmph! Richard and I have had a day of questioning the amount of taxes he's paying. Something is not right...

anOCgirl said...

OMG the story of that iraqi woman really makes my blood boil. she targeted vulnerable women, lured them into a situation where they would be raped (or shamed in some way but it was rape most of the time). and then rather than console them, she would convince them that suicide was the only answer to keep them from shaming their families as well. if that's not the worst girl-on-girl crime, i don't know what is.

twinkie said...

You know what else I've never been able to understand? Even when I qualified for it? Earned income credit. Let's see? I make minimum wage, therefore I pay NO taxes (well, almost none) AND I get money back that I didn't pay INTO the system? LOTERIA!!! I hit the jackpot! LOL

I used to tell everybody around me, "Can you hurry up and pay your taxes so I can get MY refund back? Thanks." Just to make them mad. tee hee.

Also, how can you NOT know that your "forgot" to pay your taxes? Seriously? Besides, don't you have somebody hired to handle that?

Speaking of bad mothers and I doubt this will make it to national news but somebody here locally was arrested over Super Bowl weekend for getting drunk off their you-know-whats and "sicking" a dog on their nephew because they thought it was FUNNY. So the kid was mauled as this drunk biznatch kept saying, "Attack Attack" and laughing her bleepppppp off. Nice auntie! OH, the kicker? The family watched on and laughed until they realize the dog WASN'T kidding.

fiona said...

I don't even pretend to understand the whole "Tax" thing here. In the UK the gvmt deals with all that and it comes off weekly/monthly no Tax returns required.
Ahem - don't see myself on your good mother list...just saying!

Mike said...

At least Daschle removed himself from the nomination process unlike the dweeb that is now our tax overseer.

And apparently you haven't donated to the "help poor Nadya" fund. I've got their address in case you need it.

@Fiona - I was expecting an 'eejit' there.

Bilbo said...

John - hypersau = a really fast female pig.

Amanda - I call 'em as I see 'em. Good luck with Richard's taxes.

OCgirl - welcome to the Middle East. Set your watch back 1700 years.

Twinkie - wow!! Woke you up, didn't I??

Fiona - it comes off every paycheck here, too. You just have to give more at the end of the year if you didn't tell the gov't how much to take. And as for the good mother's list, well, your post today qualifies you...

Mike - burn the address. That's a REAL eejit there...

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Taxes here tend to pay a lot for things we don't want or to people we don't like.

Leslie David said...

I just did my taxes-I get $800 back from the Feds and owe $8 to the state. I already know where the $800 is going--airfare to Spain.

Bilbo said...

Jean-Luc - it's universal. The Klingons probably complain about their taxes, too.

Leslie - need someone to carry your bags...?

craziequeen said...

Morning from a snowy UK, Bilbo :-)

Motherhood stories like the ones you have highlighted really break my heart. Speaking as one who cannot have children I would like the shake these ungrateful women firmly by the throat for being such terrible mothers.

I hope with every fibre in my being that the 14 Suleman children do not pay for her stupidity - but I feel they will.....

Question - who paid for her fertility treatment? She is obviously fertile - the first 6 children pretty much prove that!


KKTSews said...

craziequeen--my sister is a Reproductive Endocrinologist and I know two things relevant to the Suleman situation from discussions with her: 1) implanting 8 embyros in a young, proven fertile women is way out of bounds of the standard of care for this specialty and 2) the procedure is expensive so your question is a good one. But it is NEVER covered under insurance, so someone paid and not the public, at least for the procedure.
What gets me is what happens to any of her kids as they have the audacity to grow out of being babies? She's "obsessed with babies"? What does she do to them or for them when they are no longer snuggly and tiny?
Makes me want to vote for forced sterilization to protect humankind.