Thursday, March 05, 2009

Things Somebody Else Said

I'm a little distracted this morning because I'm looking forward with the usual great excitement to my semiannual dental exam at 8:00. On the good side, Laura the dental assistant is a very nice person who keeps coming up with innovative ways to chide me for not flossing well enough: last time, she told me that if I don't floss, the uneven buildup of placque (plaque? plak? plack?) on my teeth will cause my head to be unbalanced, which will negatively affect my dancing. I didn't want to tell her that my head has been unbalanced for years, as all of you already know. On the bad side, well, it's a dental exam. How pleasant can it be?

Anyhow, in lieu of deep thought, here are a few random quotes for a Thursday. Mike can do the videos, I'll do the verbiage...

First up is a cautionary note for my blogging friend Andrea, who reviews music CDs in her "Elfslut Says" column on Livejournal. From yesterday's page on my "365 Stupidest Things Anyone Ever Said" calendar comes this quote from a press release publicizing the music of a band called Infernal Method...don't let this happen to you:

"This is strictly a pantagraphic hauntography of proto-mantic motherworlds. Mysteriograms of toposonic radiances are deconstructed and raptoluminal resonances at residual numinophillic nemeta sites are reiterated in the myoboreal precincts."

Oddly enough, these sound very much like the jumbles of words Alan Greenspan used to roll out while he was snowing Congress before the economic meltdown. I wonder if he's now making his living as a music reviewer.

I ran across this quote from King Farouk of Egypt years ago, and still think it's as astute commentary on world politics as any I've seen:

"The whole world is in revolt. Soon there will be only five Kings left--the King of England, the King of Spades, The King of Clubs, the King of Hearts, and the King of Diamonds."

Of course, England now has a queen, but that's beside the point...

American humorist Will Rogers is one of my heroes - a genuinely funny, astute, and gentle observer of life and politics. His death in an airplane crash in 1935 was truly a national tragedy, and deprived us of someone whose commentary we could really have used today. Among the many comments for which he is justly remembered is this one:

"If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around."

Yeah, Rush Limbaugh and Nancy Pelosi, give it a try. I'd like to see a dog laugh.

And finally, from writer and historian Hillaire Belloc comes this comment about our political classes that rings ever more true:

"The standard of intellect in politics is so low that men of moderate mental capacity have to stoop in order to reach it."

Could this be why there are so many ... uh ... stoopid people on Capitol Hill?

Okay, that's enough for now. I need to brush my teeth and floss about 15 times so Laura won't look at me with her usual disapproving frown.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.



Amanda said...

I know we're told to floss floss floss but I keep thinking of all the old people in my life. They NEVER flossed and have most of their teeth.

Still, to be on the safe side, I try to remember to do the tedius flossing and have started flossing Aaron's tiny teeth.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

As much as I hate the is better than the OB-GYN. Trust me on that.

Anonymous said...

Mistress of the Dark:

The comeback for your comment from the male side: digital prostate exam. That being said, I'm quite happy to leave the child bearing to the tough, smart half of the human race!

Bilbo's perpetually anonymous friend

fiona said...

Oh dear Bilbo, only you could post about an innocent dental exam and have OB-GYNs and Digital Prostate Exams appear in your comments...

wv - ranting - AKA "Bilbo" lol

Mike said...

I'm checking comments and thought, HEY, where's my comment? Oh right, I didn't leave one. I was going to come back later. Here I am, commentless.

Wv - curicti - What killed the caticty.

Mike said...

THAT'S what I was going to comment on. Flossing. The best thing you can do to extend your life. Up to six years. And here's how to do it.

Get a shower 'stick on' mirror. Stick it. In the shower. Keep the floss on the shelf in the shower (get one). After you shower, floss. When your done flossing hose the mirror and shower wall down and you're done. No mess to worry about.

Foggy mirror? Take some soap, rub on the mirror, take one swipe of your hand over the mirror. This leaves just enough soap film to keep the mirror from fogging.

Wv - cookedn - What the devil did.