Cartoon Saturday

I think I'll hurry up and get on with this before some dumbass tries to filibuster it ...

The Vatican announced on Monday that priests could not bless same-sex unions, calling any such blessing “not licit,” but said that the church should welcome gay people “with respect and sensitivity” without endorsing marriage between them; the World Meteorological Organization has decided to stop using Greek letters when the Atlantic runs out of names for hurricanes in future years, but has not yet made a decision on a recommendation to use the names of GOP lawmakers for particularly destructive storms; eight people, mainly women of Asian descent, were murdered and another wounded in Atlanta by a killer using a 9mm handgun; John Magufuli, the president of Tanzania and one of Africa's most prominent coronavirus sceptics, has died of Covid-19; and in San Francisco, an elderly Asian woman attacked and injured by a man who was apparently looking for an easy target turned the tables on her assailant, beating him so severely he had to be taken to a hospital.

This week, a look at how we've used technology to survive the pandemic. I've also included a couple of memes that I thought were particularly good ...

How things might have been ...  

Won't it be nice to go to concerts again? ...

I have the same problem ...

A man ahead of his time ...

The unfortunate side effect of bringing food to a virtual meeting ...

You really can do it all online nowadays ...

It's a valid question ...

The socially-distanced, technologically-enhanced dinner ...

How to make your toilet paper go farther ...

It works, but it really isn't as satisfying ...

And, as Walter Cronkite would have said, that's the way it is for Saturday, March 18th, 2021. I hope you enjoyed my little attempt to distract you from the cornucopia of bad news that surrounds us. Be sure to come back tomorrow for Musical Sunday, where we get things moving with a little Uptown Funk. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Great Moments in Editing and Signage

Here we go, again ...

I wonder where they're looking ...

Oh, yeah ... I'm sure this will help bring 'em back ...

Maybe this guy will decide to come back ...

Stand up for your rights! ...

I need to check the rate of pay to see if it will affect my Social Security eligibility ...

I hear it's popular with the Oath Keepers and Proud Boys ...

I don't want to hear anyone else griping about my lousy puns ...

Well, they would say that, wouldn't they? ...

Combat training gets more realistic all the time ...

For you ladies with three eyes, this is an unbeatable deal! ...

And there you go - another collection of great moments in editing and signage. If nothing else, it may help distract you from all the great moments in justice and legislation not going on at the Supreme Court and within the GOP.

Have a good day and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Poetry Sunday

Although it's not quite the middle of March, the weather here in NoVa of late has let us dare to hope that spring has finally sprung after the long and yucky winter. In the last few days, I've been able to start cleaning out my planting beds, getting the garden ready for the new crop of herbs and watching the perennials (like my chives and sage) starting to green again. And so I guess a little happy madness is in order, eh?

A little Madness in the Spring

by Emily Dickinson

A little Madness in the Spring
Is wholesome even for the King,
But God be with the Clown—
Who ponders this tremendous scene—
This whole Experiment of Green—
As if it were his own!

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

It's been quite a week ...

President Biden signed the popular (except with Congressional Republicans) American Rescue Plan into law on Thursday, making a bold move to bring the economy back to something like pre-Covid normal; New York governor Andrew Cuomo refused increasing calls for him to resign over a series of sexual harassment allegations; Linda Reynolds Australia's Defense Minister, has paid compensation to a former aide who she called a "lying cow" after she alleged she had been raped by a former colleague; the Minneapolis city council has approved a $27 million settlement to the estate of George Floyd, who was killed by a Minneapolis police officer in May of 2020; and the NCAA is suing a group of Virginia urologists who trademarked the phrase "Vasectomy Mayhem," claiming that Virginia Urology's phrase is too close to the NCAA's "March Madness" slogan and will "result in confusion, mistake or deception with petitioner and/or the goods and services marketed in connection with the NCAA."  I can't make this stuff up.

This week, a collection of cartoons without a theme ... because I'm feeling too lazy to sort them.

Using the right term is always important ...  

I would feel the same way ...

I think life may well be better the less you hear ...

If only it were a hallucination ...

Um ... no ...

Perhaps he can find someone to lens a hand ...

The GOP version of the fairy tale ...

Read the directions at least twice before starting ...

A flashback to my dating years ...

True enough ...

Have a good day and a great weekend. See you tomorrow for Poetry Sunday ... more thoughts then.

Bilbo

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for March, 2021

It's been almost exactly one year since today's Ass Clown awardee received his first award. Since then, he's tried hard for another head-nod, but has always been out-clowned by other people more outrageous than he. But this time, he's well and truly earned his second award.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for March, 2021

Tucker Carlson

(Second Award*)

Carlson, who hosts the most popular show on Fox News, ridiculed President Joe Biden Tuesday for his comment that the US military had created uniforms to fit women properly, created maternity flight suits for those who are pregnant, and updated requirements for hairstyles. Carlson mocked the President's comments, saying, 

"So we've got new hairstyles and maternity flight suits. Pregnant women are going to fight our wars. It's a mockery of the US military."

He went on to argue that China is surging ahead to cement its hormonal advantage, ramping up its "military masculinity" while the United States worries about pregnancy uniforms and female soldiers' hairstyles.

Mr Carlson is not known for his close relationship with accuracy, facts, or civility, and his comments drew quick condemnation from senior leaders at every level in the Defense Department. Pentagon spokesman John Kirby noted that "What we absolutely won't do is take personnel advice from a talk show host, or the Chinese military."

US Space Command's senior enlisted leader, Master Gunnery Sergeant Scott Stalker, referred to Mr Carlson's show as "drama TV," and reminded his audience that Carlson's opinion was "based off of actually zero days of service in the armed forces."

It bears re-emphasizing that Mr Carlson has never served in the military. He tried to join the CIA after his graduation from college, but his application was denied. 

Instead of serving his country in uniform or as a part of the Intelligence Community, he chose to become a reality-challenged shouting head in the employ of a network which undercuts and ridicules those who do.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown for March, 2021, is Faux News shouting head Tucker Carlson. In the picture above, he indicates the closest he is willing to come to actual facts and rational thought.

Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* Mr Carlson's first award was as the Left-Cheek Ass Clown for March, 2019. You can read that award citation here. 

Musical Sunday

I love to dance, and one of my favorite dances is the rumba. One of my favorite rumba tunes is a beautiful song by Juan Luis Guerra called "Burbujas de Amor" ("Love Bubbles"). Now, I speak virtually no Spanish, but I know a beautiful tune when I hear one, and the words in Spanish, although I had no idea what they meant, have always struck me as almost unbearably beautiful and sensual. But Love Bubbles?

For years, I wondered what the lyrics actually meant, and not long ago I finally got off my lazy patootie and beseeched the Google gods for a translation of the lyrics, which in English turned out to be ... well ... not quite what I had imagined. Here's the video, followed by both the Spanish and the English lyrics. Enjoy!

And now for the lyrics, first in Spanish ...

Burbujas De Amor

Tengo un corazón

mutilado de esperanza y de razón

tengo un corazón

que madruga adonde quiera

¡Ay ay ay ay ay ay!

Y ese corazón

se desnuda de impaciencia ante tu voz

pobre corazón

que no atrapa su cordura

Quisiera ser un pez

para tocar mi nariz

en tu pecera

y hacer burbujas de amor

por donde quiera

¡oh! pasar la noche en vela

mojado en ti

Un pez

para bordar de corales tu cintura

y hacer siluetas de amor

bajo la luna

¡oh! saciar esta locura

mojado en ti

Canta corazón

con un ancla imprescindible de ilusión

sueña corazón

no te nubles de amargura

¡Ay ay ay ay ay ay!

Y este corazón

se desnuda de impaciencia ante tu voz

pobre corazón

que no atrapa su cordura

Quisiera ser un pez

para tocar mi nariz

en tu pecera

y hacer burbujas de amor

por donde quiera

¡oh! pasar la noche en vela

mojado en ti

Un pez

para bordar de corales tu cintura

y hacer siluetas de amor

bajo la luna

¡oh! saciar esta locura

mojado en ti

Una noche para hundirnos

hasta el fin

cara a cara, beso a beso

y vivir

por siempre mojado en ti

Quisiera ser un pez

para tocar mi nariz

en tu pecera

y hacer burbujas de amor

por donde quiera

¡oh! pasar la noche en vela

mojado en ti

Un pez

para bordar de cayenas tu cintura

y hacer siluetas de amor

bajo la luna

¡oh! saciar esta locura

mojado en ti

Para tocar mi nariz

en tu pecera

y hacer burbujas de amor

por donde quiera

¡oh! pasar la noche en vela

mojado en ti

Un pez

para bordar de cayenas tu cintura

y hacer siluetas de amor

bajo la luna

¡oh! vaciar esta locura

mojado en ti

And now in English ...

Love Bubbles

I have a heart

That has been maimed by hope and reason

I have a heart that wakes early no matter the place

¡Ay ay ay ay ay ay!

This heart

Bares itself impatiently before your voice

Poor heart

That can't catch its sanity

I would like to be a fish

So that I could touch your fish tank with my nose

So that I could blow love bubbles everywhere, ohhhh

To stay awake all night

While soaked in you

A fish

To adorn your waist with corals

And to draw love silhouettes under the moon, ohhhh

To satisfy this madness

While soaked in you

Sing, my heart

With an essential anchor made of illusions

Dream, my heart

Be not clouded by bitterness, ay ay ay ay ay

This heart

Bares itself impatiently

Before your voice

Poor heart

That can't catch its sanity

I would like to be a fish

So that I could touch your fish tank with my nose

So that I could blow love bubbles everywhere, oohh

To stay awake all night

While soaked in you

A fish

To adorn your waist with corals

And to draw love silhouettes under the moon, ohhhh

To satisfy this madness

While soaked in you

A night

To sink to the bottom

Face to face

Kiss by kiss

And to live

Forever

Soaked in you

I would like to be a fish

So that I could touch your fish tank with my nose

So that I could blow love bubbles everywhere, oohh

To stay awake all night

While soaked in you

A fish

To adorn your waist with hibiscus

And to draw love silhouettes under the moon, ohhhh

To satisfy this madness

While soaked in you

So that I could touch your fish tank with my nose

So that I could blow love bubbles everywhere, oohh

To stay awake all night

While soaked in you

A fish

To adorn your waist with hibiscus

And to draw love silhouettes under the moon, ohhhh

To satisfy this madness

While soaked in you

I can't verify the poetic accuracy of the translation, but I'm sure you get the rather sensual idea.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. Any of you ladies who would like to dance a rumba once we can hold one another again, just let me know.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

Welcome to the first Cartoon Saturday of the new month!

As part of an attempt to impede passage of President Biden's "American Rescue Act," Wisconsin GOP senator Ron Johnson pointlessly insisted that the entire 628-page bill be read aloud ... to a chamber empty except for one Democratic and one Republican member; the Guinness World Records organization has certified the hair of Brooklyn's Simone Williams as the largest female afro on Earth for 2020 ... it measures 20.5 cm (8.07 in) tall, 22.5 cm (8.85 in) wide, and 1.48 m (4 ft 10 in) in circumference; Pope Francis arrived in Iraq for the first ever papal visit to that country; new reports indicate that top aides to New York governor Andrew Cuomo altered a state Health Department report to obscure the true number of people killed by COVID-19 in New York nursing homes; and in Missouri, a Baptist minister is on leave after delivering a sermon telling women to lose weight and submit to the sexual desires of their husbands to keep those husbands from straying.

This week, in honor of President Biden's invoking the image of "Neanderthal thinking" in response to the decision by the governors of Texas and Mississippi to reopen businesses without restrictions and eliminate mask-wearing mandates, how about a collection of cartoons about cave dwellers?

Some cave dwellers were more advanced than others ...

It still works ...

Landlords will be landlords, regardless of the era ...

The eternal disagreement ...

Applying for grants hasn't changed much ...

And it's tough when you have to do it again ...

Yes, a written language does enhance the viability of a book club ...

And there were other issues with stone-age book clubs, too ...

Political campaign contributions haven't changed all that much ...

The birth of the tire swing ...

And so it goes with the first Cartoon Saturday of March. The weather here in NoVa is nice, but still very chilly ... soon it'll be time to get back into the garden, although this year I'll have to battle the 17-year cicadas. Oy.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Musical Sunday features a beautiful, but rather odd song from Juan Luis Guerra.

Bilbo

Great Moments in Editing and Signage

And here we go with the first collection of Editorial and Signage gems for March!

Uh ... I think I'll just have the chicken ...

I wonder if the replacement of misused endoscopy equipment isn't at least partly responsible for the high cost of medical care ...

Do you suppose some bulked-up high jumper may try to snare it? ...

It would be a better price if the hose were included ...

I wish Virginia had that problem ...

Keep your sourdoughberman on a leash ...

Chicken cut from what, again? ...

You'd think it went without saying ...

From the Chinese translation of the Harry Potter stories, I guess ...

But, why? ...

Have a good day, and be sure to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday featuring the ever-popular Neanderthal thinking. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Of Minimums and Minorities

There are two things that seem to me to be of surpassing importance in looking at our political situation: the fight over the minimum wage, and the specter of minority rule.

The current push to increase the minimum wage from $7.25/hour to $15/hour is understandable, as are the arguments on both sides of the issue. In a capitalist society like ours, profits are the most important thing - every aspect of a business is geared toward maximizing profits while minimizing costs. It's obvious that a business owner focused on minimizing costs would rather pay an employee $7.25/hr rather than $15/hour. In addition to this, the argument is often made that the wage paid should reflect the capabilities required of the worker and the degree of responsibility inherent in the job. As the argument goes, the pay scale of the janitor who sweeps the floor and the CEO who makes multi-million-dollar decisions affecting the whole company need to reflect the reality of their positions in the corporate food chain.  

But it's equally clear that in most localities around the country, a full-time employee earning $7.25/hour simply can't make ends meet. That individual cannot pay the rent on a simple two-bedroom apartment, much less buy food, own a car, pay for medical insurance, take a vacation, etc. So, from the perspective of the worker trying to survive, a higher wage is crucial.

Irresistible force, meet immovable object.

Nobody could seriously argue that the CEO should not be paid more than the janitor. But simple fairness and common sense indicate that the janitor ought to be paid a wage that allows him (or her) to afford to live, not merely survive. The CEO doesn't need three homes on two continents, but the janitor needs to put food on the table, stay healthy, and get the children educated. The issue is one of economic and social fairness, not of pure profit.

The fight over the minimum wage illustrates another ongoing issue, which is the growing specter of minority rule in the United States.

Despite the fact that most progressive policies (a living wage, affordable health care, and a basic social safety net, for example) are wildly popular with large majorities of the working-level population, the conservative senators and representatives those people elect are dead-set against them. How does this make sense?

It's been noted over and over again that the conservative members of Congress as a group represent tens of millions of citizens fewer than their more progressive colleagues, and yet they continue to oppose legislation that is supported by the people they represent. In the Senate, for instance, routine use of the filibuster serves to block legislation that is popular with voters, but is opposed by the monied interests who pay for election campaigns. The conservative tail is wagging the progressive dog, while howling that the progressive dog is failing to be "bipartisan" ... which, in the telling, means failing to roll over and accept the positions of those who advocate positions their constituents do not support.  

This is crazy.

I don't know what the answer is. Well, actually, I do. The answer is for each side to recognize the fundamental interests of the other and cooperate seriously in search of a realistic accommodation. Unfortunately, this requires common sense, compassion, and a willingness to abandon political dogma and the use of simplistic bumper-sticker slogans ("socialism," "death panels," "own the libs," etc) in place of rational thought. Sadly, I don't see that happening any time soon.

I think that if the filibuster is eliminated and more progressive policies are enacted, the voting population will be able to see what works and what doesn't. They will see the difference between government by popular and people-oriented policies and government by fear and the unyielding support of profits over workers.

It's time to give sanity a chance.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Ten Things I Believe

Not that anyone asked, but here are ten things I firmly believe:

1. In general, any woman can do any job any man can do, but the reverse is not true, as men have a hard time bearing children.

2. A man and a woman doing the same job with the same responsibilities should earn the same wage.

3. There is absolutely no fundamental difference (other than obvious differences of physical appearance) among humans of different colors, races, or ethnicities.

4. Differences among humans are a function of cultural practices or political and religious beliefs, some of which are illogical or incomprehensible to those of other cultures or belief systems.

5. It's misleading to talk about a "minimum wage." It's more accurate to talk about a "living wage." Any adult working a full-time job should earn enough to cover the cost of his or her housing, food, medical care, and other basic necessities, plus enough extra to create a modest savings or enjoy leisure pursuits. A fixed minimum wage ignores the fact that the cost of living varies from place to place, and that a mandated minimum wage may actually be a starvation wage in many high-cost areas.

4. An experienced or highly-skilled worker deserves to be paid more than an inexperienced or unskilled one.

5. A CEO or owner of a business, because of the responsibilities he or she has for the success and direction of the company and the well-being of its employees, deserves to earn more than the average employee. He or she also has an obligation to ensure that the company's employees at every level earn a wage on which they can comfortably live. It's immoral for a business magnate to own multiple properties on different continents if his or her employees have to work multiple jobs to make ends meet.

6. Every United States citizen has the right to vote for his or her chosen representatives. Government at every level has an obligation to make it possible for every citizen to vote, and to make it easy and efficient for them to do so. Attempts to restrict voting rights for political advantage are despicable and immoral.

7. This country needs immigration laws and policies that look like they were designed on purpose. I have made my own proposal, which I will happily share with you if you haven't seen it. If you don't have any ideas for immigration reform other than building walls and deporting everyone who looks suspicious, shut up.

8. Our police deserve our respect and support. In return, they need to respect us, and be held to high standards of conduct and behavior. Police who abuse their authority and power should be fired at once.

9. If the only part of the Constitution you care about is the Second Amendment, you are a fool.

10. Joe Biden is the President, and he defeated Der Furor by more than seven million votes. The country is much better for it.

 

Have a good day. More thoughts as I have them.

Bilbo