Monday, May 17, 2010

Useful Latin

Looking for a way to make people think you're better educated than you really are? Try sprinkling a few Latin phrases into your daily speech. No, not "Latin" as in suspected of being here illegally, but "Latin" as in what the ancient Romans spoke. Of course, the Roman empire actually fell, but we're still using their language, which ought to count for something. So that you don't have to go through the flailing agony of actually learning Latin (which, trust me, can be a pain), here are some useful Latin phrases for you to use in your discourse...

"Domino vobiscum." - The pizza guy is here.

"Sharpei diem." - Seize the wrinkled dog.

"Nucleo predicus dispella conducticus." - Remove foil before microwaving.

"Nokiam interruptus." - Hold on, I'm going into a tunnel.

"Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi ad infinitum." - Better take the nose ring out before the job interview.

"Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum." - A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.

"E Pluribus Motorolis." - You just can't get away from people talking on their cell phones.

"Veni, vidi, Pesci." - I came, I saw, I moidered da bum.

"Revelare Pecunia!" - Show Me The Money!

"Sic semper tyrannus." - Your dinosaur is ill.

"No Quid Pro Quo." - I'm sorry, we're all out of quid.

"Cavaet humanus sic tofu burritus e toga." - Beware of the man with a tofu burrito in his toga.

"Nunc Tutus Exitus Computarus." - It's Now Safe To Turn Off Your Computer.

"Veni, Vidi, Vichy." - I came, I saw, I capitulated to the Germans.

"Veni, Vidi, Velcro" - I came, I saw, I stuck around.

"Et tu, pluribus unum?" - The government just stabbed me in the back.

"E pluribus septum." - Multiple nose piercings.

Next time you need to sound erudite, you'll thank me. If your idea of political activism consists of simply shouting mindless slogans, you might as well sound good doing it.

No charge!

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.



Jean-Luc Picard said...

A very clever list!

Mike said...

Why no latin phrase for 'no cahrge'? Maybe the Romans charged for everything.

Wv: lacifin - I don't even have a five dollar bill.

Amanda said...

Good one!

SusieQ said...

I LOVE it!