Monday, May 24, 2010

Wii, Wii, Wii All the Way Home...

Oui, we have a Wii.

For those of you who don't know what a Wii is, it's something which allows you to waste vast amounts of time and energy in an alternate reality.

Kind of like being a Tea Party person, but you can turn it off with the push of a button.

But anyhow...

Our son and our daughter each have Wiis, and we decided we (Wii?) ought to have one, too. After all, exercising with an oddly-featured digital copy of a personal trainer is so much nicer than doing the same exercises at the gym, where we have to endure the sideways glances and giggles of the buff, snickering gym rats as we try desperately to touch toes we haven't even seen for years.

The Wii is easy to install, assuming you have:

a. Access to an electrical engineer; and,

b. A space-age television with faster-than-light drive, a plagrastic variognometer calibrated in versts per angstrom per fortnight (squared), and the correct input plugs in an accessible location. (Note: There is no such thing as an accessible location when your TV is mounted on the wall...every available input plug you need is conveniently located on the back of the set, where it's dark, full of cobwebs, you cannot see anything, and you have about 1.5 inches of space in which to work.)

Miraculously, I managed to properly install not only the Wii, but also the wireless balance board. The wireless balance board is a high-tech device designed to transmit embarrassing information about your weight and body fat index to the Wii by way of the television set. Taken as a whole, the Wii system enables you to be insulted not by a living, breathing, sweating gym rat, but by a pudgy digital copy of yourself (cleverly known as a Mii, oui?).

So, we have a Wii. And we each have a Mii. My Mii is a wee me (as Fiona might say). And my Mii mocks me. What have Wii done...or we done?

Stay tuned to find out if my Mii gradually turns sleek and svelte instead of pudgy.

Wii'll let you know.

Oui.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

4 comments:

The Mistress of the Dark said...

much cheaper to become addicted to mindless games on Facebook. Plus you won't do yourself any damage :P

John said...

Yeah, what she said!

wv: stormeds--anti-anxiety pills you give to your dog that goes ballistic at the sound of thunder.

Mike said...

But the big question is when you get tired of it after a wiik can you hang laundry on it.

Amanda said...

YAY! We have fantastic family fun with the Wii. You'll love it.

When my father installed it, we had three engineers in the house. It still took hours and in the end the simple fix was to make sure the Wii console was the right way up when putting the DVD in.