Monday, January 24, 2011

Confessions and Redemptions

We all have our deep, dark secrets ... the things we never want to admit to anyone because of the shame and embarrassment they might bring down upon us. But sometimes, you just have to hang your head, grit your teeth, and admit the terrifying reality you've buried deep inside for so many years.

I don't give a %#$! about professional sports.

There, I've said it.

The result of that sad confession, though, is likely to be a mass un-friending of me by all my old high-school friends who have been using Facebook to share their breathless following of the Pittsburgh Steelers as they march toward their Super Bowl matchup with the Green Bay Packers. And since all the beautiful girls I lusted after in high school have finally decided - now that I'm a pushing-60 grandfather - that I wasn't so bad after all, we just can't have that.

So ... confessions be damned! I declare myself, here and now, to be a born-again, rabid fan of my hometown team!

Go, Steelers!

Terrible Towels beat Cheeseheads any day!

Our quarterback's name has more letters in it than your quarterback's name!

We've already won twice as many (6) Super Bowls than you have (3), and only that washed-up has-been team from Dallas (we won't dignify them by mentioning their name) has been to the Super Bowl as many times as we have (8) ... and we've won more of them than they have.

"Steelers" even sounds more powerful and impressive than "Packers".

Our cheerleaders (especially those from good old NA High) are cuter than your cheerleaders!

Just phone in your concession now, Green Bay, and save yourselves the embarrassment.

Have a good day. Root for the right team on February 6th.

More thoughts tomorrow.



Amanda said...

I hope your team wins!

Raquel's World said...

Wahooo For the Steelers! I just found my love of football this year when my son played (middle school) But nonetheless I love it!
My other son is a die hard Steelers fan. I may actually watch the Super Bowl for once.

Mike said...

ME: So Bilbo can you tell me where you went to high school?

Bilbo: NA

ME: You are old aren't you!

KathyA said...

Pox on you!

Bandit said...

Is this post about the Steelers (BOO) or about aging cheerleaders? There was a story on Yahoo about the oldest NFL cheerleader. She is on the Cincy Ben-Gals squad and is 42 years old. She aged well!

I do agree with you by also saying poo on Dallas.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Here we go!

I think if you are in Pittsburgh, the love for our teams is so infectious that you have to cheer for them.

I know nothing about any sport, but when the Pens or the Steelers are winning...I always feel great for them...and well for the economy in the Burgh that needs as much stimulation as possible.