Sunday, August 08, 2021

Poetry Sunday


There's nothing quite like a warm, soft summer night, is there? Emily Brontë paints a wonderful picture of the quiet beauty we hope to enjoy, despite the ravages of climate change ...

Moonlight, Summer Moonlight
by Emily Brontë

'Tis moonlight, summer moonlight,
All soft and still and fair;
The solemn hour of midnight
Breathes sweet thoughts everywhere,

But most where trees are sending
Their breezy boughs on high,
Or stooping low are lending
A shelter from the sky.

And there in those wild bowers
A lovely form is laid;
Green grass and dew-steeped flowers
Wave gently round her head.


Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, August 07, 2021

Cartoon Saturday


Agnes and I are once again on the road this week, and so the usual news summary will have to wait until next week. You can enjoy the cartoons without it, right?

This week, in honor of ZZ Top bassist Dusty Hill, who passed away this past week at the too-young age of 72, a collection of cartoons about musicians and bands ...

Let's start with a few cartoons actually riffing on ZZ Top ...


Oy ... just, oy ...


and, of course, the ancient Greek version of the band ...


This isn't, strictly speaking, about a band, but I couldn't pass it up ...


It's a breakout act ...


Hail, yes! ...


Yes. Yes, he does ...


Everybody just wants to move too fast ...


For those times when you really want to lean into the music ...


You had to see this one coming ...


And that's it for this week, the first Cartoon Saturday of August and our sort-of homage to the late Dusty Hill. Hope you enjoyed it.

Have a good day and a great weekend, and come back tomorrow for Poetry Sunday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

Friday, August 06, 2021

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


And Away we go with the first set of Great Moments for the new month ...

Can't beat a view like that, can you? ...


The decision must have been made by Republicans high on the rush of having killed an impartial investigation into January 6th ...


Doesn't that sort of miss the point? ...


I wonder what the writer of this caption was thinking ...


I guess he's selling it because it didn't work as intended ...


The wildlife gets more brazen all the time ...


I guess they're easier to hit ...


What, it should have sounded like a V8? ...


I think this sign painter is probably looking for a new job ...


This strikes me as an odd trade ...


And that's it for this week - I hope you enjoyed this collection of ya-ha's. Don't forget to send me scans or pictures of editorial and signage gems you may run across to share with everyone else.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when Cartoon Saturday greets the new month.

Bilbo

Wednesday, August 04, 2021

Ass Clown Special Award


While the world of politics continues to dominate the nation's supply of ass clowns, the world of quasi-religious leaders also continues to churn out powerful candidates who are particularly dangerous because they wrap their ass clownery in the language of self-righteous religious belief. Today, we honor an ass clown whose language and actions are particularly stupid and dangerous, presenting an

Ass Clown Special Award


to

Greg Locke


Mr Locke, the extreme right-wing "pastor" of the Global Vision Bible Church in Mt Juliet, Tennessee, has gained notoriety for his fiery denunciation of Covid-19 as a "hoax," and for his vow to eject from his services anyone who enters wearing a protective mask. He not only refuses to accept the dangerous validity of the Covid-19 pandemic - with predictable effects for the followers he orders "do not get vaccinated" - but he has used his denial of the pandemic as a political cudgel to push his extreme conservative agenda, raging that only "crack-smoking, demon-possessed leftists" believe that President Biden is the legitimately-elected president. 

In a recent sermon, Mr Locke thundered,

"They're talking about shutting down this nation for round two. Talking about masking everybody back up, shutting down churches. My hind leg if they think they gonna shut this church down ... Knock on my door, ask me if I got a vaccine? My hind leg. Don’t let the door hit you where the good Lord split you."

So much for Christian charity and the biblical command to love one's neighbor.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, we present today's Ass Clown Special Award to Greg Locke, a man who represents the worst of self-described Christians and a deadly danger to those who blindly follow his hysterical ravings. We also award him a Gohmert Stupidity Scale rating of 3,000,000 ghm - the very top of the scale. He is a clear medical danger to those who follow his guidance, and those who come into contact with them. He deserves the condemnation of every rational human being, and especially those who profess to follow the example of Jesus Christ.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming. 

Bilbo

Sunday, August 01, 2021

Musical Sunday


We all remember the Good Old Days ... the days we remember with fond nostalgia, even though - at the time - they were no better than the Bad New Days. This wonderful song by the Statler Brothers speaks to those of us who are of my age or older, and who sometimes wish for better days ... better in memory, at least.


Have a good day, and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Saturday, July 31, 2021

Cartoon Saturday


Here we go again ...

The House Select Committee investigating the origins of the January 6th Capitol riot met for the first time on Tuesday, and heard gripping testimony from four of the police officers who battled the mob of loving and gentle tourists; according to contemporaneous handwritten notes from former acting deputy attorney general Richard Donoghue, Der Furor pressured then-acting Attorney General Jeffrey Rosen to simply declare that the 2020 presidential election was corrupt, telling Rosen to "Just say that the election was corrupt + leave the rest to me and the R. Congressmen;" beloved gymnastics champion Simone Biles withdrew from the Olympic competitions, citing the mental stress affecting her ability to perform at her best; GOP representatives Matt Gaetz, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Paul Gosar, and Louie Gohmert held a silly news conference in front of the Justice Department, attempting to divert attention from the Capitol riot hearings by demanding "answers" about the treatment of people they paint as "political prisoners" ... they were then blocked as they tried to gain access to the DC jail to ensure the imprisoned insurrectionists were being treated well; and in Montana, two Helena residents were arrested after an investigation into an aircraft abandoned on Highway 93 south of Hamilton revealed that the plane had been stolen from a Helena area aviation company.

After the past week of political chicanery, you need cartoons. This week, let's just look at cartoons based on puns and wordplay ...

Cheese it, the cops! ...


It would be a step in the right direction, anyhow ...


For those of you unfamiliar with the reference, look here ...


Pick the right one ...


Perhaps they can settle their differences with an archery contest ...


It ain't over 'til the fat alien sings ...


It may be a long trip ... he should pack a Bach's lunch ...


Beware the side effects ...


Not to worry - civility is pretty well dead in most parts of the country ...


Tracked by the sound of the flush ...


And that's it for this week's edition of Cartoon Saturday; hope it helped you get over the news of the week.

Have a good day and a great weekend. Come back tomorrow, when Musical Sunday takes a nostalgic look back to the days we thought were better. More thoughts then. 

Bilbo

Friday, July 30, 2021

The On-Crack Ass Clown for July, 2021


Ah, the stupidity ...

The list of people serving in Congress who are unqualified to serve in such an important position is very long, and seems to grow longer all the time. Today, we recognize the amazing ass clownery of one of the most ludicrously unqualified members of the Senate as we name

The On-Crack Ass Clown for July, 2021





In a tweet he sent on July 15th, Senator Tuberville said,

"Growing up, look at the things that we as government have taken control of and you name me one thing that's been prosperous. I thought long and hard and it doesn't work."


"Everything the federal government takes over is a disaster."

Senator Tuberville clearly has no concept or knowledge of history, having failed to remember such federal government disasters as the interstate highway system, safe and effective Covid-19 vaccines, safe food and drugs, victory in World War II, and astronauts walking on the moon.

Senator Tuberville also has only the vaguest concept of the government in which he serves, stating in November of last year that

“Our government wasn’t set up for one group to have all three branches of government — wasn’t set up that way ... You know, the House, the Senate, and the executive.”

The three branches of government are, of course, the Legislative, Executive, and Judicial, as anyone with passing familiarity with the Constitution would know. The Senator also has no grasp of history, as the numerous examples in this article show.

It's hard to believe that the people of Alabama could have elected such an uninformed and uneducated buffoon to the Senate, but here we are. At a time when the nation needs sound, solid, and adult leadership, we are represented at the highest levels of government by the likes of Tommy Tuberville. Heaven help us.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the On-Crack Ass Clown for July, 2021, is Senator Tommy Tuberville - one of the dimmest bulbs in the low-wattage legislative chandelier. Because of the potential he represents for long-term damage to the national interest, he is awarded a score of 1,500,000 on the Gohmert Stupidity Scale - the upper end of the "Dangerously Stupid" range, allowing plenty of room for growth.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when Cartoon Saturday marks the last day of the month.

Bilbo

Wednesday, July 28, 2021

Ass Clown Special Award


I'm starting to get really depressed by the proliferation of amazingly stupid, proudly hypocritical ass clowns out there. There are days I'm divided between presenting ass clown awards every day and giving the whole thing up as a waste of my brain cells. But I'm going to soldier on and keep pointing out the idiots, because someone has to.

Although there are reinforced battalions of ass clowns in politics that could keep me busy for months, I have decided to turn to that other rich source of hypocrisy and bad behavior - religion - for my latest award.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, I hereby present an

Ass Clown Special Award


to

Monsignor Jeffrey Burrill


Monsignor Burrill was the top administrator for the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops until July 20th, and had taken a strong position in favor of denying Holy Communion to President Biden because of his support of abortion rights. He resigned after a Catholic newsletter alleged that cellphone data showed he had repeatedly used the Grindr dating app and visited gay bars ... after all, Catholic dogma forbids sexual relations outside heterosexual marriage and considers same-sex relations and marriage “intrinsically disordered.”

One can argue (and many have) that the use of Burrill's cell phone data to expose his private life is a violation of privacy and an offense in itself. Nevertheless, given the Catholic Church's long and sordid history of priests involved in sexual abuse and its uncompromising opposition to those who oppose its teachings on topics like abortion and homosexuality, Burrill's rank hypocrisy is illustrative of the larger problem of hypocritical behavior on the part of many religious leaders.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, this week's Ass Clown Special Award goes to Monsignor Jeffrey Burrill - a prime example of the hypocrisy of many modern religious leaders.

Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Tuesday, July 27, 2021

Abracadabra, Please and Thank You


Let me begin by clearly stating that I'm no saint. I have behaved badly from time to time, and have done things that, in retrospect, I am ashamed of. I always try to do well and live right, but I do occasionally fall off the wagon of good behavior.

Okay, now that that's out of the way, what the heck is wrong with people nowadays?

People of every age, religion (especially religion), color, and culture are behaving like total, self-absorbed, self-righteous idiots. Look at the world around us ...

Because Der Furor needed to blame his mismanagement of the Coronavirus pandemic on something other than his lack of leadership and common sense, he harped on the theme of a Chinese virus - the "kung flu." And what happened? Brainless morons assumed this meant it was okay to assault elderly oriental people on the street, because their fearless leader gave them license to do it.

We might have beaten the pandemic with the vaccines developed in record time by dedicated scientists ... but because so many people have been conditioned to believe that their personal freedoms and desires are more important that the lives and safety of those around them, and because there are politicians to whom their power and agenda are more important than the lives of their constituents, more than 610,000 Americans are dead, and the number continues to climb in states where rights and freedoms are more important than the common good.

"Karens" and "Kevins" (the male equivalent) feel empowered to launch their fears and prejudices like weapons at any time and place, making them look like spoiled and undisciplined children.

The absolute right to unrestricted ownership of guns has led to terrible carnage on our streets, but because the Second Amendment is more important than the preservation of life, there is no chance of rational thought or discussion of ways to minimize the danger.

People treat each other badly in general because they see their leaders behaving badly without consequences. Remember that video of Der Furor shoving the Prime Minister of Montenegro out of the way so he could preen at the center of a group photo? And look at the behavior of fools like Marjorie Taylor Greene, Jim Jordan, and Ted Cruz. Is this how we want our children to behave?

My parents always stressed the importance of good behavior and acceptance of responsibility for our actions. They were unfailingly polite and generous and expected us to be the same. Their philosophy was that we should always behave well toward others until they give us reason to do otherwise ... then you have room to launch back. I've tried to follow their example by trying to be slow to anger, but more than willing to make it worth someone's while if they push me to it.

I remember seeing a movie long ago in which a character commented that there were two kinds of people in the world - diplomats and door mats - and that you didn't have to be both. The message was that you could be polite and diplomatic without letting everyone walk over you. It's a good thing to remember nowadays, when it seems that many people equate politeness and good manners with weakness and submission.

On his TV program for young children, Captain Kangaroo often invoked his magic words - "Abracadabra, Please, and Thank You" - as a way of teaching young children the importance of being polite. Where's the Captain now, when we need someone to model good behavior?

This has been a sort of stream-of-consciousness post*, but right now I'm being bothered by the miserable behavior of most Americans and don't know what to make of it. If you see me acting badly, you have my permission to give Calvin a dollar on my behalf ...


Have a good day. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

* I hope it made more sense than one of Der Furor's stream-of-unconsciousness rally speeches, if nothing else.

Sunday, July 25, 2021

Poetry Sunday


One of the best features of my garden is its ability to attract butterflies and hummingbirds. The bee balm plant I received as a gift from one of my neighbors, although much the worse for wear from the beating it took in fierce storms earlier this summer, pulls in the beautiful little birds who have more energy than anything but a caffeinated two-year-old ... and we honor them with today's poem by Jonathan Greene.

HUMMINGBIRDS
by Jonathan Greene

Can fly every which way.
Taught helicopters to rise
straight up from the ground.

What does not work for us
works for them: being overly industrious,
overeating, surviving a sweet tooth,
a non-stop exuberance.

No down time to sing alleluias,
even after arriving at a distant home,
having crossed continents.

Never thinking to preen
to show off a ruby throat,
iridescent feathers.

Consider yourself blessed
by their visits.


Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. Greet the hummingbirds and the butterflies as honored guests if they visit your garden.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo