Musical Sunday

The way the world is going now, is it any wonder? ...

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

Oh, for Pete's sake ...

Der Furor has paid a $110 thousand contempt of court fine imposed by a New York judge after he (Der Furor, that is) failed to produce documents in response to a subpoena issued by the New York state Attorney General; celebrity doctor Mehmet Oz and former hedge fund CEO David McCormick are preparing for a runoff election after finishing in a near dead heat in the Pennsylvania primary elections this past Tuesday; as if we didn't have enough to worry about, cases of infectious monkeypox are being investigated in the US, as well as in several European countries, Canada, and Australia ... with all the monkey business going on in the GOP, there are fears of a serious outbreak among Republicans; Taliban authorities in Afghanistan have ordered female news anchors to cover their faces while on television; and in Finland, a small brewery has launched a NATO-themed beer to mark the country’s bid to join the military alliance ... the brew is called "OTAN," which is a pun on the Finnish expression “Otan olutta,” which means “I’ll have a beer,” and the French abbreviation for NATO, which is “OTAN.”

This week, since hard-core conservatives are trying hard to impose their religious beliefs on the entire population, I thought a few cartoons featuring religion and The Almighty would be appropriate ...

You'd think God could get any domain he/she wanted ...  

It rather depends on which side you're on, doesn't it? ...

At least they give you a warning ...

God tries the Microsoft approach to problem solving ...

He must be a Labrador Redeemer ...

Food truck in the Garden ...

I think that sounds truer every day ...

You'd think an almighty and omnipotent deity would have more to worry about ...

Yeah, marketing ...

Where you can stretch your muscles as well as your credulity ...

Have a good day and a great weekend ... more thoughts tomorrow, when Musical Sunday returns.

Bilbo

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for May, 2022

It's time once again to heap dishonor upon a worthy ass clown. As always, the competition for this dishonor was intense and I had a difficult time sorting through the long list of unworthies, but I finally managed to decide.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, designation as

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for May, 2022

is presented to

Representative Elise Stefanik (R, NY-21)

Representative Stefanik, the third-ranking House Republican and chair of the House Republican Conference since 2021, has been noted for her extreme rightward shift and embrace of bizarre conspiracy theories. She made a real, if unfortunate, name for herself this past week when she published the following tweet (view in her Twitter feed here):

The White House, House Dems, & usual pedo grifters are so out of touch with the American people that rather than present ANY PLAN or urgency to address the nationwide baby formula crisis, they double down on sending pallets of formula to the southern border. Joe Biden has NO PLAN

— Elise Stefanik (@EliseStefanik) May 13, 2022

Consider for a moment the utter lack of class, dignity, and decorum of a sitting member of Congress accusing the President and members of the opposing political party of being "pedophile grifters" ... a term directly out of the fevered minds of those who gleefully swim in the Q-Anon sewer. Even at a time when one has come to expect childish and immature behavior from many members of Congress, Ms Stefanik's tweet hit rock bottom of the decorum hole and kept on digging.

Predictably, once the backlash over her tweet began, Ms Stefanik accused her critics of deliberately misinterpreting her words, and her communications director tried to divert attention by claiming she was referring to members of the anti-Trump Lincoln Project who are "protect(ing) known pedophiles who preyed on minors."*

And for all that she accused the President and the Democrats of having no plan to address the nationwide shortage of baby formula, she failed to note that while immigration detention centers do have supplies of baby formula for the babies of undocumented migrants, they are required by a law in place since the late 1990s to provide adequate nutrition to minors in custody. She also failed to note that the Republicans have offered no specific plan to resolve the issue, either.**

New York Representative Elise Stefanik is, unquestionably, an ass clown of the highest order and well-deserving of designation as the Left-Cheek Ass Clown for this month. Her constituents ... and the nation ... deserve better.

Have a good day, and come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* It is true that John Weaver, a co-founder of The Lincoln Project, was accused of sexual misconduct involving minors. Far from protecting him, however, the organization immediately cut all ties with Weaver and condemned his actions, issuing a statement at the time that "John Weaver led a secret life that was built on a foundation of deception at every level. He is a predator, a liar, and an abuser. We extend our deepest sympathies to those who were targeted by his deplorable and predatory behavior. We are disgusted and outraged that someone in a position of power and trust would use it for these means."

** Not to mention that 192 House Republicans voted against a $28 million emergency spending bill to address the nationwide shortage of baby formula ... and nine Republicans voted against a bill that would help poor families buy formula by expanding on a federal program to help low-income women and children. If only those children were unborn ...

Poetry Sunday

It seems that the favored emotion of the time is hate, as we've seen in the latest horrific mass murder in Buffalo yesterday. We don't just object to the beliefs of those who worship differently (or not at all), we hate them. We don't just think the political views of those with whom we disagree are wrong or objectionable, we hate them for being Republicans, Democrats, libs, cucks, RINOs, or whatever. There have been many articles and studies on the psychology of hatred (you can read one here), but understanding the blind hatred of many of the people interviewed on our evening news broadcasts is simply beyond my ability to empathize. It seems that some people just enjoy hating ... but not everyone can move on after the hatred as Laure-Anne Bosselaar suggests in today's poem ...

The Pleasures of Hating

by Laure-Anne Bosselaar

I hate Mozart. Hate him with that healthy

pleasure one feels when exasperation has

crescendoed, when lungs, heart, throat,

and voice explode at once: I hate that! —

there's bliss in this, rapture. My shrink

tried to disabuse me, convinced I use Amadeus

as a prop: Think further, your father perhaps?

I won't go back, think of the shrink

with a powdered wig, pinched lips, mole:

a transference, he'd say, a relapse: so be it.

I hate broccoli, chain saws, patchouli, bra—

clasps that draw dents in your back, roadblocks,

men in black kneesocks, sandals and shorts—

I love hating that. Loathe stickers on tomatoes,

jerky, deconstruction, nazis, doilies. I delight

in detesting. And love loving so much after that.

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. Try not to hate so much.

More thoughts later.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

Oy, vey ...

In the latest unintended consequence of Russia's invasion of Ukraine, the president and prime minister of Finland have announced they are in favor of requesting NATO membership "without delay;" in Canton, Ohio, a nonprofit grocery delivery service that provides affordable groceries to low-income residents had to cancel deliveries after thieves stole the catalytic converters from all their vehicles; North Korea has finally admitted the first case of Covid-19 within its borders; police investigators in South Carolina have announced that a man found "unresponsive" in his yard by paramedics had suffered a heart attack while trying to bury the body of a woman he evidently murdered; and in Canada, a member of the national parliament has apologized after he was caught logging on to a closed parliamentary session from a toilet stall.

This week, because the news is driving us all to drink, I thought a collection of cartoons about wine would be appropriate ...

I like this particular cooking technique ...  

I think this would be me if I ever got back into the dating pool ...

Homemade wine. Yes. But, no ...

Good advice. Before I met my wife, my method of selecting a wine was a careful reading of the label to make sure it showed castles or naked women ...

One of my favorite wine cartoons ...

Some wines might be improved this way ...

I've eaten at restaurants like this one ...

Reducing the choice to the essentials ...

I guess that would be it ...

Everybody's a critic ...

Salut!

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow, when Poetry Sunday returns.

Bilbo

Great Moments in Editing and Signage

Once more into the breach, dear friends ...

So far, there's no vaccine for David-19 ...

Dunkin' Donuts now available intravenously ...

An unfortunate sign of the times ...

I think that a lot of people have had their heads messed up by an orange worm ...

I think I'll go with the distilled water ...

Sponge Bob found a new job in HR after his acting career ...

He was told to what??? ...

Unfortunate editorial juxtaposition ...

Cannibals are coming from miles away to take advantage of these prices ...

Well, at least it's not Mexican-flavored ... unless the cemetery is in Mexico ...

And that's it for today's edition of Great Moments in Editing and Signage - I hope you enjoyed it.

Have a good day, and ignore the fact that it's Friday the 13th ... in this verkakte year, it's no worse than any other day.

More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

Mothers Day, 2022

If you came here looking for Musical Sunday, you'll need to wait for two weeks. Today, we revisit my traditional salute to mothers everywhere.

Today is Mothers’ Day, the one day each year we set aside to honor the lady we undervalue the other 364. It’s the day we remember the person who made our hurts better, explained our homework, cooked our meals, washed our clothes, drove us where we needed to go, warned us about our less-savory acquaintances, embarrassed us in front of our friends, and did her best to point us down the straight line of a moral and upright life.

Mothers are the wonderful and woefully underappreciated people from whom the Army and the Navy stole their one-time recruiting slogans - the Army's "We do more before 9 AM than most people do all day," and the Navy's "It's not just a job, it's an adventure." With all due respect to Soldiers and Sailors everywhere ... you guys ain't got a clue.

Somewhere in my web surfings I found this little riff on how we look at our Mothers at different ages:

Age 4: Mommy can do anything!

Age 8: Mom knows a lot!

Age 12: Mother doesn't know everything.

Age 14: Mother doesn't know anything.

Age 16: Mother is so old-fashioned.

Age 18: Her? She's out of it.

Age 25: Mom might know something about that.

Age 35: Before we decide, let's ask Mom.

Age 45: What would Mom have thought about that?

Age 65: I wish I could talk that over with Mom.

It’s true.

My mother passed away twenty-one years ago at the far-too-young age of 74. She spent a long and honorable life raising four children who, I like to think, made her proud ... most of the time, anyway. And in her twilight years, her once-formidable mind ravaged by Alzheimer’s Disease, she missed much of the result of her love and care and sacrifice – a son who finally knows how to dance (and who may yet write that book she thought he had in him), a small army of grandchildren, and six beautiful great-grandchildren who will never know her love and wisdom and the off-the-wall sense of humor that brightened the lives of everyone who knew her.

The next generation of Mothers has taken over. My beloved daughter Yasmin and the best daughter-in-law in the world, Tabitha, between them are raising the world’s six greatest grandchildren. And someday those wonderful grandchildren will sit down on Mothers’ Day and reflect – just as their grandpa does today – on the woman who gave up so much of her own life and dreams to make them who they are.

Take the time today to give your Mother a hug and a kiss. Someday, you’ll wish you had.

And so again this year, I wish all the mothers out there doing the world's toughest job, a very happy Mothers' Day and many more to come.

We couldn't be what we are, or do what we do, without you.

And lest you think I'm getting too maudlin about the whole thing, here's a picture from long ago of my Dad with four then and future moms: my daughter Yasmin, my sister Lisa, Agnes, and my mother ...

We're a weird family, but somehow we've all turned out all right. More or less.

Have a great Mothers' Day!

More thoughts later.

Bilbo

Cartoon Saturday

The first week in May looks a lot like all the other previous weeks in this crummy year ...

The leaked draft of a Supreme Court decision authored by Justice Samuel Alito appears to show that the heavily-conservative court is prepared to overturn Roe v Wade and other precedents and end the federally-protected right to abortion; Russian forces invading Ukraine appear to be looting vast amounts of grain in an attempt to further wreck the Ukrainian economy while lessening the impact of sanctions on Russia; in Arizona, falling water levels in Lake Mead caused by ongoing drought conditions has revealed a body sealed in a barrel, with more such discoveries expected; Representative Madison Cawthorne has said he "won't back down" after a naked video of him in bed was leaked, the latest in a series of bizarre behaviors from the young North Carolina representative; and - remaining in North Carolina - a woman has died after getting stuck in a bread machine for an hour ... the second time within weeks a worker has died while operating an industrial bread machine in the state.

We need cartoons, stat ... this week, featuring law, courts, and lawyers, because why not? ...

Really successful lawyers are born, not made ...

The GOP takes the next step on monitoring personal behavior ...

We're people ... until we aren't ...

Best legal invention ever ...

If Guy Fawkes had been a Republican ...

Clearly, it can ...

Uh, oh ...

Sometimes, it's the best form of community service ...

Modern presentation of jury decisions ...

Yes, that's worse ...

And that's it for this week's Cartoon Saturday ... I hope it helped you cope.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for May, 2022

From the embarrassment of "riches" that is the pool of potential Ass Clown Award nominees, it's often hard to single out a winner, but this time there's no contest ... we present the award for

The Right-Cheek Ass Clown for May, 2022

to

Senator Susan Collins (R, ME)

During Der Furor's efforts to pack the Supreme Court with deeply conservative sycophants, one of his consistently-reliable Senate votes came from Maine Senator Susan Collins, who piously supported the brazen theft of one court seat and the filling of two others with manifestly unqualified justices.

Now, as the leaked draft of a Supreme Court decision reversing the 1973 Roe v Wade decision which protected a woman's right to choose abortion reveals, at least two and probably all three of Der Furor's court appointees openly lied during their confirmation hearings when they agreed that Roe v. Wade was settled law under the principle of stare decisis. Collins reacted to the news with this comment: 

"If this leaked draft opinion is the final decision and this reporting is accurate, it would be completely inconsistent with what Justice Gorsuch and Justice Kavanaugh said in their hearings and in our meetings in my office."

Completely inconsistent with is a supremely political euphemism for lied. 

We might also note that Senator Collins twice voted against the impeachment of Der Furor for his attempt to strongarm Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelinsky and his incitement of the January 6th, 2020, insurrection, telling Norah O'Donnell of CBS News that 

“I believe that the president has learned from this case. The president has been impeached. That’s a pretty big lesson.”

If nothing else, Senator Collins deserves recognition as the most consistently gullible member of Congress, a person impervious to evidence and in service to the maintenance of a deeply conservative political, religious, and social agenda unpopular with the great majority of Americans.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, the Right-Cheek Ass Clown Award for May, 2022, is presented to Maine Republican Senator Susan Collins ... the woman whose failure to recognize and punish official wrongdoing at the very highest levels of government has led directly to the awful political, social, and judicial conditions we see in today's America.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow, when Cartoon Saturday makes its first appearance for May.

Bilbo

Poetry Sunday

My old friend Gonzo Dave sent me this poem a few weeks ago, figuring I would jump on it for a Poetry Sunday offering. He was right.

 

The Valuable Time of Maturity

By Mário de Andrade

I counted my years and discovered that I have 

less time to live going forward than I have lived until now. 

I have more past than future. 

I feel like the boy who received a bowl of candies. 

The first ones, he ate ungracious, 

but when he realized there were only a few left, 

he began to taste them deeply. 

I do not have time to deal with mediocrity. 

I do not want to be in meetings where parade inflamed egos. 

I am bothered by the envious, who seek to discredit 

the most able, to usurp their places, 

coveting their seats, talent, achievements and luck. 

I do not have time for endless conversations, 

useless to discuss about the lives of others 

who are not part of mine. 

I do not have time to manage sensitivities of people 

who despite their chronological age, are immature. 

I cannot stand the result that generates 

from those struggling for power. 

People do not discuss content, only the labels. 

My time has become scarce to discuss labels, 

I want the essence, my soul is in a hurry… 

Not many candies in the bowl… 

I want to live close to human people, 

very human, who laugh of their own stumbles, 

and away from those turned smug and overconfident 

with their triumphs, 

away from those filled with self-importance, 

Who does not run away from their responsibilities .. 

Who defends human dignity. 

And who only want to walk on the side of truth 

and honesty. 

The essential is what makes 

life worthwhile. 

I want to surround myself with people, 

who know how to touch the hearts of people …. 

People to whom the hard knocks of life, 

taught them to grow with softness in their soul. 

Yes …. I am in a hurry … to live with intensity, 

that only maturity can bring. 

I intend not to waste any part of the goodies 

I have left … 

I'm sure they will be more exquisite, 

that most of which so far I've eaten. 

My goal is to arrive to the end satisfied and in peace 

with my loved ones and my conscience. 

I hope that your goal is the same, 

because either way you will get there, too. 

Wouldn't it be nice if all of us could live with our consciences once the sands run out?

Have a good day and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts coming.

Bilbo